Aftermath

Who: Syn and Seph
When: laaaaate late
Where: Martens' house, Seph's room
Warning: rated R

Seph had gone through the hours following the events in the cemetery in something of a daze. Syn had forced him into the shower while she more or less settled Eli downstairs. After scrubbing his skin almost raw, Seph hadn't gone to seek her out. She was busy. Instead he'd gone to lay down and -- surprisingly -- sank immediately into a dark, dreamless sleep. He hadn't woken when she came in at some point an untold time later, just automatically made room as he always did. It was sometime in the dead of night when he stopped sleeping peacefully. Seph's eyebrows drew together as his blue eyes twitched back and forth under their lids. He was dreaming that he was carrying a body again, over his shoulders. But instead of neat brown hair, it was long and blond and soaked in blood. And the legs that hung down over his other shoulder had vines and thorns carved into them ... over her tattoos .... He rolled over roughly, making a noise in the back of his throat.

His moving made Syn stir, and she'd been only sleeping in the loosest sense of the word. She came more awake, arm around him tightening. She got a little bit of what he was seeing, broken fragments that she couldn't quite connect together in the right way. Distant images that she just knew she didn't like. At the sound he made, she rested her forehead against his. Seph. She called, soft as it echoed between their minds.

In his dream, Seph heard his sister call for him. He turned around, the body of their mother suddenly in his arms instead of behind him. She was naked and much paler than she should've been. Or at least the parts that weren't covered in blood were pale. She was so light, though, and easy to carry, and he didn't want to put her down on the ground out here in the woods. She'd get dirty. The image of her wasn't a memory that he held himself, but one he'd gleaned from Syn's mind. Syn? he called back, starting to walk toward the sound of her voice. Even though it came from everywhere.

You're dreaming. Come back to me. she called, getting as close as she could physically as she shifted again. She tugged the covers over them both better since they'd gotten tangled in the course of sleeping. She nuzzled against his cheek a touch. Come back. Come back, come back.

Oh. With their mental connection, it really was that easy. Seph's eyes opened to the dark of his room, and for a brief second he felt the ghost-weight of Bridget Reyanne Kayos in his arms before that faded too. He lay still while he got his bearings. Did I wake you? he murmured internally.

Syn continued nuzzling, really slowly. A little. I don't think I was sleeping that well though. Are you okay? she asked. She got the feeling of their mother. There, drifting, something. And she didn't want to focus there because she knew that they had other things to focus on. That and she had enough of her own issues with their mother and what happened to her. Enough that she didn't want to bring up more bad mental imagery...she knew he'd gotten it from her in the first place.

He thought about that for a moment, eyelids slipping a teensy bit more closed as she nuzzled his cheek. Seph shifted some, not enough to dislodge her, but enough to get his legs back into a more comfortable position. I dunno, he finally answered truthfully. Are you? He looked at her out of the corner of his eye. The dream slipped away from him completely, and he let it.

She nodded, nuzzling more by his jaw then. Her cheek still hurt, and before she'd come to join him, she'd noticed that it had bruised, and was probably dark by now if a little swollen. Still working that out myself. she admitted. Though she tried to project a calmer sort of mental state than she truly felt. She was still off balance, and she needed to work out why.

He had -- blissfully, for the moment -- put what he was going to do to Eli out of his mind. Concern for Syn, instead, bubbled up. She had worse physical injury, of course, it was how she felt that concerned him. Seph rolled over on his side to wrap one arm around her and draw her in closer. Her calm projection didn't fool him much. Tell me, he encouraged, fingers threading into her hair.

She sighed, and snuggled into him, resting her face in against his neck. I don't know what to say or where to start. she admitted. I'm worried about you. I'm worried about Eli. I'm still shakey over...feeling things earlier, and I can't tell you how grateful I am that you did it. But I know...I know it had to cost you something and I don't even know where to start making it up to you. She knew of course that he wouldn't expect to have it made up to him. That wasn't the point.

Seph had a brief moment of emotional scoffing. He of course didn't expect any sort of making-up of anything. It was what he'd wanted to do, it was all part of protecting her. Nevermind that it was the end of a human life ... she hadn't been any sort of saint. She'd reeked of bad karma. He knew that his mind wouldn't let it be that simple, but ... he'd have to cross those bridges when he came to them. I'll be okay, he assured her. Though 'okay' was really relative, wasn't it?

She pulled back, just enough to thread her fingers through his hair to get it out of his eyes, so she could hold his gaze. Will you? she asked, the fact that she was still so concerned about it all easy to see in every fiber of her being. You'll really be okay? You promise me?

He of course couldn't look away from her. He never could, that was part of the problem. If he even considered it a problem anymore. I can't promise you, he admitted, internal voice very quiet. His eyes ticked back and forth between her's. All I can really promise is that I'll try.

Pain flickered behind her eyes. Sharp and immediate, and her chest ached around her heart. The last thing in the world she wanted was for anything to cause him more grief. She hugged him again, arms going around his neck to cling to him tightly. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry, I want you to be okay, I wish you hadn't done it, I should have, it wasn't up to you, I should have then you'd be okay-- the thoughts of that nature spun endlessly in circles in her head as she hugged him. She had wanted the bitch dead, but not at the cost of anything Seph-related. He was more important and always would be.

Seph was a little blinking-surprised by that reaction. He hugged her back, however, trying to project solid and comforting and There feelings. No, don't, he sent to her, trying to interrupt her circles. I don't regret it. ... I did it for you. It's okay. No, you shouldn't have done it, it's not ... it's not good for you. This is what I am. He rocked her a little as he spoke in his mind, keeping his tone soft and gentle. His hand smoothed over the back of her hair.

No it's not. Just because you're capable of it doesn't mean that's what you are at all. I am too. she hadn't had opportunity to before, that was all. It would cost her something if she did, hell, just being in range cost her something, but she knew if she had gotten there on time she wouldn't have hesitated. Hell she might have done worse. But that was neither here nor there. I don't want anything to go wrong for you over something you did for me. she added, nearly inaudible even in their heads.

For some inexplicable reason, that made Seph smile a little bit. It was kind of funny, in an ironic way; they both lived to protect each other. Hell, they'd argue and bicker over who got to do the protecting where. He gave her a gentle squeeze and nuzzled his cheek lightly on her's. To stop something potentially bad from happening to you? Anything it does to me will be worth it, he said, and sounded absolutely sure of that. She had a gun, Syn. She knew you, probably expected you to be there. She didn't see me coming a mile away. No matter the fallout that might still be yet to come, he felt like he'd done the right thing. The very impulsive and violent thing, but the right one.

Syn shuddered a little, at the potential of how wrong things could have gone. God, it could have gone so very differently. What if she'd started shooting? What if she hadn't missed? She knew her brother well enough to know that he was damn good and she didn't doubt his ability even the slightest bit, but that didn't change how Evelyn might have behaved. It brought on a wave of her own determination, to once again figure her abilities the fuck out so she could make sure nothing was going to happen to him. And even if it did? It would still be okay. She had to do it, and soon. I love you.

He was naturally getting echoes and resonances of the hypotheticals that were dancing through her mind. Seph pulled her in even closer, so they were fully snuggled together. "I love you too," he murmured out loud into her ear. "I'm not going anywhere without you." He turned his head to kiss her temple gently. Even if the circumstances were utterly unnatural, Seph knew that to be true. If one of them died? The other wouldn't be far behind. It was just the way they worked. There wouldn't be any grieving and moving on. It would end both of them. It was comforting, in a way. Even though he wanted her to be happy and fulfilled in her life, he wanted her with him too. All the way. It was a confusing paradox sometimes, but ... they each needed the reassurance.

That made her feel better, and she smiled a touch, some of the tension that she'd wracked up since earlier that day releasing. Not all of it by far, but some. It was partially his words, and partially the feelings about the two of them not having to deal without each other. That wouldn't happen. She knew she was incapable of it. As stable as she could be, that all went to hell if she didn't have her brother. Even the thought was enough to make her feel emotionally gutted. So his reassurances were helping, little by little. "You better not." she murmured. "You're not allowed and I make the rules." Her voice was soft and a tiny bit hoarse, mostly due to disuse for a while, but partly due to emotion.

"'Cause you're mistress of the universe," he agreed, his voice equally soft. Seph's fingers dipped into the hair at the back of her neck, gently stroking even as he held her as close as he possibly could. It never quite felt close enough, especially not since their minds had become linked. But it seemed to be helping her, and so he wasn't about to stop any of it. He knew how she felt; out of control, recently faced with a harrowing reality that didn't crash down too often. The reality that they could lose. Even if they'd die together, neither one of them wanted to. There was still too much to be done, they were only 19, for god's sake. You are my universe, he murmured internally. And I'm always gonna be here for you. To take the bullets and give them, both.

I don't want you to do it alone. Syn protested lightly, still in the process of calming down. He was good for that, and it was still working. I'm with you, it shouldn't all be on your head and I don't want it to be. Next time, don't leave me behind. Please. I'd rather be there with you than left without, while you're... she trailed off. She'd finally hit on one of the larger issues she'd been having even if she hadn't been able to pinpoint it until she'd said it. She didn't want to be left behind.

Seph felt her realization and mulled it over for a minute. He hadn't thought about it like that, really. He was more trying to spontaneously protect her. He pressed his cheek to her's and looked at the dark wall on the other side of her. I didn't mean to, he told her quietly. I ... really didn't plan it at all. I didn't even know where Eli was going, I just ... What? Wanted to watch him? I followed him, got caught up in it. That girl -- Lydia -- she wasn't prepared. And he just ... Yeah, that didn't even need to be said. Eli being at all useful in that situation wasn't going to happen. I couldn't stand the thought of that woman getting near you, he added in a low mental murmur.

She listened, and nodded, a tiny incline of her head. She could see where it had sort of gone off sideways, unplanned, things falling into place as they had without forethought put into it. Next time, bring me with you. I don't care what happens, I don't care what might go down. I just want to be there when it does. She meant it, wholeheartedly. She didn't want him doing anything like that without her. It just wasn't the way her world view had things, and it was throwing everything off to see it otherwise.

Okay. What could he be but agreeable? It wasn't that he didn't want her there, didn't think she could handle herself; Syn had faced down scarier shit than he had, in some senses. He just knew that she didn't want him playing hero, and he could understand that. If the situation were reversed, he'd be saying the same thing. Seph gave her a squeeze and softly kissed her cheek. He didn't really have much more to say at the moment, so he just focused on snuggling her properly and sharing comfortable and calm vibes with her. It always made him feel better to comfort her, so it was mutually beneficial.

It was definitely working for her. She snuggled back, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Then she smiled, expression pressed into his neck. That a boy. she said, warmth flooding through her tone, maybe the light edges of playful behind it. Which signified more than anything that she was feeling better. He was okay, he wasn't going to leave her behind anymore, and whatever was going to happen was going to be dealt with together. You know...you were very badass today. she added.

Oh you think so? he sent back, sounding faintly amused. He'd lost it there at the end, he knew, had gone a teensy bit over the deep end ... but it had felt disturbingly good. It had felt powerful and sort of righteous. I didn't have my sunglasses, though. I should be more prepared for this kind of thing. Even though the words were flippant, his tone wasn't entirely. It had been an incredibly stressful day, he wasn't far enough away from it quite yet to turn it completely into a joke.

Yes, I think so. Syn said, still smiling, and she nuzzled his neck a bit. Her mind brought up the images she had of him, and the way he was just...there. A presence to be reckoned with, the man with whom not to fuck. There were times when he got like that, usually when everything was going to hell, and he'd been there and solid while she hadn't been. That to her was badass. Not to mention some other things, but all in all, she did like glimpses of him like that.

If it wouldn't have been totally ridiculous, Seph might've chest-puffed a little. During those times -- always in the past at least, who knew now that she'd drawn attention to it -- he was never aware of himself. Just of what he felt he had to do. Because it was always when everything was going to hell. Seph snuggled in closer, pressing his forehead to her shoulder. Which maybe wasn't so badass of him, but ... he wanted to. It felt a little odd to know that she could see him like that, but not entirely in a bad way.

Synnove played with his hair, still smiling to herself. You're my hero, you know. You come through whenever I really need you to. And he looked good doing it. That was something she didn't put words to, though she couldn't hide the sentiment that was drifting around beneath her articulate mind. There was just something so powerful about him when he clicked into a certain frame of mind, when anything in his way was either going to have to get out of it fast or was going to be run the fuck over.

Funny, he always thought the same thing about her. When Syn was angry? Or hell, even really focused? She practically buzzed with power. It was tantalizing. You almost expected to feel the vibrations in your skin when you touched her. He found it -- though he'd have trouble admitting it out loud -- very erotic. But she had him more focused on himself now, and what she thought about him. ... it comes really natural, he responded, breathing in the scent of her so up close. I just ... do it. I dunno about it making me heroic, really. But it was obviously pleasing to hear, he knew she could tell.

My definition of heroic and everyone else's might not quite coincide. Syn said, amused. I said you were my hero. Because you are. I know you'd never let anything happen to me. It was the way it was. And yes, she secretly (or not, at current) enjoyed seeing him when he was like that. Probably sick and wrong, but definitely true. She couldn't help it.

Well I won't, he stated. It was a fact, just like gravity. He took a second to ponder the feeling she was giving off, that she liked it when he was that way. Seph pulled back a little to look at her face, brushing some hair lightly out of the way. His mind was sort of questioning, interested in poking at that feeling with a stick, seeing if it would move or not.

She looked back at him, and a slow sort of smirky smile crossed her lips. "What?" she asked, slightly innocent lilt to her tone. She knew that it probably wasn't going to fly, what with the fact that she really wasn't innocent and he knew that, and he had felt what she had been feeling a few moments before in regards to him. There weren't any secrets when you had your minds and hearts hooked up on a direct line, after all.

Seph gave her a wry look. "You know what," he responded, switching to verbal as she did by instinct. They seemed to do that, follow one another's speech methods. Unless something was really wrong. Though he did like that expression on her face. It was just ... kinda mischievous. He pinched lightly at her side, starting to smirk himself. "You like-like it."

She laughed, batting at his hand where he pinched her. "Hey." she scolded. "Okay so I do, something the matter with that?" she asked lightly. There was a touch of a challenge beneath her tone. Like she was just daring him to have a problem with it. Or to say something else about it.

He put a mental thumb over his immediate thought, which was to remind her that some people thought there was a big problem with that. He didn't want to go there at the moment. He was busy having fun with her. "Do I look like I think there's something the matter with it?" he countered, his own tone light and teasing. "I don't want any trouble now, lady. You can ogle my badassery anytime you want."

Syn giggled at that, grinning at him impishly. "That's right." she said. "No arguing with me. And besides, who can blame me? Did you see you? Hmmm? Noooo I don't think you did. I did. And I say you were very, very...interesting...in all of your badassitude." Because making up words was fun. She had a mental flash of him, all focused and angry and there was blood on him, and okay she tried to block that one but it so didn't work out for her.

"Interesting, huh?" he echoed, unable to stop himself from grinning back at her. It gave him stomach-butterflies, it really did. She thought he was hot. When he got like that, at least. He could see it in her mind. It wasn't a huge secret between them or anything, Seph had learned what got her fires stoked, but ... still ... It made him want to do it more. Amongst other things that he was really trying not to let slip through. It just wasn't working. Bitey, pin-y, forceful things.

There were obviously advantages to having the mental hook up. Then there were times like this, when it might just be more damaging. Because she did get the other imagery and feelings, and nothing quite turned Syn on like the sorts of things that his mind brought up. It was just the way she was. She liked when a guy could take charge, and she liked when things skipped over soft and sweet and went straight for the heated need. Therefore it was just a touch belated when she managed to remember to answer. "...yeah. Interesting."

Seph wasn't really sure what they were talking about anymore. He was more aware of the feel of her and the breathy quality to her voice, so much so that he'd pretty well lost the thread of conversation. The feelings evoked in her by his own thoughts and feelings were unbelivably tantalizing, regardless of what kind of hell the rest of the day had been. Maybe it was just more evidence of their screwed up wiring, but all the love and need he felt for her were tangled up in other sorts of love and need. And it wasn't just him. Seph just stared at the dim shape of her face in the dark.

She stared back at him, almost motionless save for the light thread of her fingers through his hair. There was the faintest twitch of a smile that quirked on her lips, a helpless expression. These were the moments it was the most difficult to remember that the things he(they?) wanted weren't right, or at all doable. When she kinda sorta forgot about it.

That was most of the time for Seph. Especially when she was in his bed, all snuggled up to him like she was. His hand moved very slowly to brush a bit of her silky hair away from her ear. He should probably say something, think something coherent, ask her again if she was okay. But nothing was really coming out. Only having to move in a little bit, he very softly kissed the corner of her mouth.

Syn didn't stop him. Which was really her biggest downfall. She hadn't made moves to stop him in a while. Since California, really. And while things like this didn't happen spectacularly often, they did happen. Turning her face a little more towards him, she didn't kiss him, not yet anyhow, but she was there so he could kiss her. She could feel his breath against her lips, something that gave her stomach light butterflies.

Seph didn't take advantage of it, not right away. He just hovered there, feeling their breath mingle, and the warmth that was coming off of her mouth and sinking into his. It was tantalizing, and a brand of torture that he didn't mind in the slightest. It was delicious, really. The tip of one finger traced the curve of her ear very slowly.

At the slow, light touch, a shiver went down her spine. Goosebumps rose up on her arms, in a pleasant sort of way. Her breath hesitated for a second before she remembered to continue breathing. It was a sort of torture, but she didn't mind. She didn't know what he would do, and that was part of the appeal.

"You should sleep more," he breathed, though his tone said otherwise. Very much otherwise. That finger continued it's trail over her earlobe and down the side of her neck, barely touching. She was so snug and soft against him ... her mouth was so close ... Seph's blue eyes were dark on her face, watching her expression avidly.

Her eyes remained on his, and she tried to keep the shivers surpressed, but that so wasn't workin out for her. Nooo not at all. Tiny ones kept wracking through her frame. Syn was always fascinated with his eyes when he was like this. What she saw in them, the depth behind them and the emotions. She didn't think anyone in the world would ever look at her quite the way he did. No one had to date, and she didn't figure it would ever happen. "Probably." she agreed, again later than it should have been, her distraction not letting her mind catch up with current conversation until then. Her voice was soft, a breath like his had been. And yet she wasn't making any move to comply with the whole sleep thing.

It was strange, the way that dominance passed between them in times like this. It fascinated him in a really distant way. He loved it when she had it, told him what to do. Hell, he'd fantasized about the time she'd slapped him countless times since it happened. But trading off to please her? Taking the reins in a way that they could never ever tell anyone else about? There just weren't words for it. Seph drew it out a little longer, just curling his fingers slowly against the back of her neck. He tilted his head in just enough to brush his lips against her's. Just the barest suggestion of contact.

There was a soft sound, little more than an exhale, but there with the almost but not quite a kiss. It was always a little electrifying, the heavy feel to the air even when it also felt charged. Anticipation along with flutters of everything else came into play, and she drew her bottom lip between her teeth, letting it back out again just the tiniest bit moistened. How long was it going to be before he kissed her? What would it be like when he did? She couldn't wait to find out, and yet she didn't push at all for him to finish it. After all. He was in charge at the moment.

If Seph was a stronger man, he might not have done it. He might've let her sweat it out, rolled over and gone back to sleep. Or at least tried. More sleep probably wasn't really possible for a while after this. Even though they weren't really doing anything just then, his body was reacting to her just as strongly as it always did. He dragged out the anticipation for another few heartbeats before he moved forward that little bit again. Only this time it was to catch her lower lip between his teeth. Just to see what sound she made.

A tiny bit more vocal than the last had been was the sound she made, that along with an intake of breath. Her arm moved, sliding around his middle in some attempt to get closer even if they were already pushed up against each other. And mentally woven into each other. So yeah. But she did it anyhow, an automatic sort of reaction that said they weren't close enough for her liking. Luckily, she was distracted by the little jolts that were going through her system from him biting at her lip.

He held onto her lip, his own curling up a bit. Her eyes were hypnotic; they looked completely black in the dark of the room. But warm. Or maybe that was just him feeling the mental heat coming off of her. Didn't matter. Either way, it was ... beyond any adjective he really had. You belong to me, his mind murmured at her without him really having to project it. And it was true, just as he belonged to her. Their possession was mutual. No matter what crazy bitch-mothers tried to make him think.

So it was probably something bordering on(or full on toppling over and setting up house and planting trees and becoming a pillar of the community) wrong that she liked the possessive. Really, it was. People shouldn't be possessive like that of their siblings. But then again, people shouldn't be turned on by their siblings either and she was. But yes, despite the fact that she was an insanely independent person for the most part--she liked the possessiveness. She had it for him right back. I do. she agreed. Yours.

That seemed to give him move of a visceral thrill than even the way they were pressed together. She was his. She'd even said so. There wasn't anything in her mind that even closely resembled Eli at the moment, which of course only encouraged the overwhelming feeling of mine that had taken up residence for the moment. Seph relented to what they both wanted at last and kissed her, hard and immediately deep. His arm moved around her ribs and locked solidly there, keeping her captive at least for a few minutes.

That was better. She kissed him back, falling over into it easily. Far too easily, really, but definitely easily. Her capacity for resisting this sort of thing had diminished considerably, and now was a perfect example of that. She just didn't want to. What she wanted to do was kiss him, get as much of a taste of him in return as he did of her. That low drop in her stomach that spread warmth out rushing along with it.

As much as this was the real world, it wasn't at the same time. It was the always-odd-feeling dead of fucking night, so much emotionally-draining stuff had gone on during the day, it was dark and close and his room felt so cut off from the rest of the house ... when they were together this way, it was almost as though their mental connection spun a web around them that kept everything else out just as much as it kept them in. What was impossible in the daylight hours (as of now, at least) was delicious here. Seph made a deep soft sound against her lips and didn't let up for a second.

Syn threaded her fingers into his hair and made a fist, pulling at it--though not to get him away from her. No, if he tried that, she would have pulled him right back. She just didn't pay attention to little things like hair pulling possilby being a little painful. She didn't think he would mind. Nipping sharply at his bottom lip, she made a soft little moan, then drew in a breath before she went back to properly kissing him.

Seph so didn't mind. Even though she liked to be dominated, when she did stuff like that? It drove him wild. Which likely wasn't a good thing for his twin sister to know, but there it was. Seph pushed off the bed, rolling and getting her under him. It was an aggressive move, but he was far too in the moment to think about how well it might work out. His hips rocked against her's a bit as he nipped right back.

It shocked her a bit, but in a good way. The sound she made articulated that well. Very well. She even possibly pushed back against him, arms up around his neck as she kept him pulled in tight, not wanting him to pull back at all. Noooo no. Not yet. Even though yes, she was aware that they should knock this off, it just wasn't happening right this instant. No way in hell.

He half-supported his own weight, one of his hands finding it's way into her hair. He gripped and pulled in return, while the other slid down to get a hold on her hip. Feeling the way it moved under his palm was even more of a turn on. Hell, everything about her was. The sounds, the way she clung to him, just ... her. Seph was completely lost, and he couldn't care less.

The pull to her hair sent a rush through her system. Fast. It was like an adrenaline shot dumped into her veins, making her moan and shudder. When she pulled away from the kiss to breathe, she trailed kisses and nips along his jawline to his ear where she bit there, exhaling into it.

He groaned loudly, overtaken by a full-body shiver. His mind was spinning out of control, pushing forward into imagining all the things he wanted to do to her. All the things he was so close to doing to her. He could feel her heat. There wasn't much fabric between them, after all, and it was flimsy and he realized that his fingers had curled in her waistband and were starting to yank. With another groan that was far more pained than the first, Seph pushed himself back away from her. He kept going until he wasn't touching her at all anymore, on his knees at the foot of the bed. He was panting. It wasn't that he didn't want to fulfill every single one of those fantasies right then and there. He did. He very very much did. It was the timing. Neither of them were ready to handle that in any manner of means, and ... it had been an impossible day. It might hurt her more than she felt when he woke her up. And Seph couldn't do that.

She was left blinking, almost in a bit of a daze when he pulled away, and she curled up, eyes not leaving him. She had to calm down, breath taking it's sweet time to even the hell out, and her heart thudded dully in her ears. Syn had all sorts of awful ideas that went through her own head, things she wanted to do and just barely slapped down the urges for. It might have been because he was out of reach that she managed. If he hadn't been? She couldn't say for sure that she might have had the willpower. Not after the day she'd had. That both of them had had. Not actually managing to articulate it into words, the feelings she projected were a silent question of whether or not she should go back to her own room. She didn't want to, but...well. Neither one of them was doing particularly well at the moment, now were they?

Seph didn't really want her to go either. He wasn't entirely sure what he wanted that wasn't falling back on her and picking up where he'd just stopped things. But that made the bed very dangerous ground. At least he was slowly starting to breathe normally again. He ran his hands through his hair and projected confusion back at her. But he didn't want to be alone. That much was obvious. Maybe just ... he needed a minute ... He slipped off the bed and took a couple of steps away from it, letting the air cool his skin off some. Are you okay? he asked.

Her eyes tracked his movement, refusing to let him out of her sight even if she really should probably give herself that little bit of time too. ...I don't know. she answered honestly. Though the general consensus in her head was also that she couldn't be bothered to care. She was in a strange sort of mental place, wreckage around her but she hadn't started really dealing with it. Like pain that was bareable because of medication--but you knew it wasn't really gone. You just couldn't feel it. Are you?

He glanced down at himself. He was still aroused, but felt vaguely like he was going to yark on the carpet. So, that was nice and confusing too. I don't know either, he replied. After a minute he turned around again and moved back to the edge of the bed. He felt the overwhelming urge to apologize, as always when stuff like this happened. Seph sat, but kept himself upright, hand moving almost shyly to find her's.

Synnove reached out to curl her fingers around his, eyes on his back and profile. She gave his hand a squeeze, not sure what to do now. She kind of wanted to get up move behind him, hug him from behind. But really that might be a bit much in the contact department right now. Probably wouldn't be very helpful to either of them. Is there anything I can do? she asked, not thinking he'd give her an answer, but she was hoping for one.

Seph squelched his automatic response to that question, because relief? Not in the cards tonight. And it wouldn't really be good for either one of them in the long run. He didn't think so, anyway. God, it wasn't like he could rationally think about much of anything at the moment. He squeezed her hand back. Don't think so, he answered honestly. The yearning was there to get close to her too, but he wasn't yet. ... anything I can do? He turned to look at her over his shoulder.

She met his gaze, and slowly shook her head. Nothing I can think of. she answered. My head isn't very clear right now. Like he needed that pointed out. It was messier than it had been in a while, really. Distant storms going on behind her surface thoughts and feelings, things she wasn't giving focus to and wasn't about to start, either. Not right now, and if she could help it, not anytime soon either. She did pull lightly on his hand though. Not hard enough to force him back down to her, but a clear indication that she would like him back now, thank you.

He could certainly sympathize with an unclear head. Though it was more of a normal state of being for him. His head was rarely clear in the best of circumstances. He recognized the hand-pull for what it was and moved to lay down next to her again. He felt ... calmer, if not really better, so that was okay. He settled on his side, still holding her hand. His arm twitched to slide around her, but he stopped it. She could set the pace for that kind of thing, because he wasn't entirely trustworthy. Or at all.

She stayed on her side, their held hands between them. Bringing them closer, she pressed a kiss to the back of his hand, then rested her cheek against it. We should get some sleep. Not that she figured either one of them were feeling particularly sleepy. She knew she wasn't. Exhausted, yes, but sleepy? No. And her exhaustion hadn't even registered in the face of what they'd been up to minutes ago. That had swept everything aside. Now in the aftermath of it, when everything still felt so unsettled(unfinished?) she was noticing the ache in her muscles, the burn in her eyes like they'd been open too long.

Yeah, Seph agreed. He was in largely the same boat: completely wiped, but wide awake. He wondered briefly if going to masturbate would quell that any, but decided that he didn't want to leave her long enough to do that. ... or make her listen to it. He shifted in a little bit closer and let his eyelids drift shut. I love you, he added quietly, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.

I love you too. Syn assured him, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. She moved closer to press a kiss to his forehead, and hesitated propped just a little bit up and over him. The hesitation was because she wanted to brush a kiss over his lips too. Wanted to very very badly, but she knew that would probably just start everything right back up again, and who knew if this time either one of them would have the good sense to back off. So she didn't, laying back down to where she had been. Not as close as she would like to be, hands clasped on the bed between them. Good night.