Alternate Focus

Who: Thom and Ashbelle
Where: Their house
When: Evening

Thom had spent the rest of the day alone, avoiding contact with everyone. He felt numb at first, then progressed throguh to anger, pain and feeling the weight of his own stupidity. His rage was all directed at himself for ever putting himself in this position, for doing what he never did and naively believing that it would all turn out right in the end. For being a fool and an idiot.

The anger passed eventually, leaving behind it something else, a determination, a knowledge of where he would go from here. It was cool and calm and collected and so, so clear. It made so much sense and he knew what he had to do now. He walked upstairs, out of the basement when it was the right time. It was Sunday, 6 o'clock - dinner with his mother. Come hell or high water - the only thing that had stopped him being there was the inbetween. His mother was already sitting at the table when he walked into the dining room and he placed the knife she'd given him in the middle of the table. "I want to learn how to use it properly," he said, quietly.

Ashbelle looked at the knife, noticed the new wear on it, and wondered what other marks her son would put upon the blade, like her father had watched the ones she'd put on herself. Ticking her gaze up to eye him, she didn't answer immediately, taking in his body language, and wondering if she were sensing something wrong, or if she were merely looking for something. Since he'd gotten back, she tended to overreact when it came to his moods, at least internally. She kept it mostly to herself, but she was aware she was doing it. "Then you'll learn how to use it properly." she said. "Would you prefer lessons from someone in town? Is that all you would like to learn?”

"I've been thinking about that - about what else I'll need. I don't think learning to shoot would go amiss, I'm already taking martial arts, but I'm thinking of stepping up on that too. With everything that's been going on in town lately - time to stop messing around, I need to start taking everything seriously." Which was almost laughable coming from Thom, since a lot of people would say he took everything seriously anyhow.

That got a pause from his mother, definitely. She was looking at him assessingly. "Are you alright?" she asked simply. She really wanted to ask more, but she knew that it probably wouldn't get her anywhere, so she was going to start there. He didn't seem alright, and she was hoping he wouldn't cut her out or anything, but it was possible. Teenagers did that sort of thing a lot, and he'd taken to it even more lately. There was a lot going on with him, and she was sure she didn't know the half of it--even if she kept much better tabs on him than he probably was aware of.

"Not really, but I'm working on it," Thom admitted - he'd never been particularly good at lying to his mother. He made himself look her in the eye, unwavering. Strong, he could be strong - he would be strong, he'd be fucking strong, dammit. He'd always been good at that, he'd been losing it lately and he was going to get it back. back on track - that's where he needed to be. That's where he would be. Even if it took every ounce of his iron self control.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" she asked. "And eat something, Thomas." she aded. She set her own utensils down and took a drink of her milk, attention all on her son. "You know if there's anything I can do, I will." she added.

Thom picked up his fork and started pushing his food around his plate, before taking a small bite, chewing mechanically and swallowing. "I broke up with Leija today," he said after a while, not looking up - he couldn't say that and retain control if he met her eyes, he knew that much. Even if he'd rephrased what had actually happened. She never loved me. he was sure of that no - there was no other explanation. Even if she'd been playing down what she felt for Lockwood, you didn't pick up and put down love that easily. That quickly.

"Oh..." Ashbelle said, frowning. "I'm so sorry, Thom. I know how much you cared about her." she said, real sympathy there. Ashbelle herself had made a career out of avoiding any types of romantic entanglements, and really, that had worked out for her. But living a solitary life wasn't something everyone was cut out for, and she never really wanted her son following in her footsteps on that score unless he really wanted to. He didn't seem to, as far as she could tell. She didn't deal with this very often though, the last time being that witch of a girl Em. Who she still harbored ill feelings for, in her secret, motherly sort of way.

I loved her. He pushed his food round for a moment, then made himself look up, not quite meeting his mother's eyes, but doing a good impression of looking in that direction. "It's probably for the best. And I won't have to worry about her being and angel and everything will be less... complicated. And with the way things seem to be going lately... It's for the best." Wow, and he almost sounded like he meant that as well!

His mother didn't buy that. Not really. She could understand why he was saying it, certainly. But that didn't mean she thought it was anywhere near the truth. No, those were the words of someone who was attempting to convince themselves of something. "Thomas I know I came down rather hard on things when I found out she was an angel, but I don't want you to think that you have to live your life free of complications. Some people are worth them, and frankly, they just happen. One day you look up, and there's someone around who's going to throw a wrench into the whole works. That's alright."

Yeah, that's what I thought too, Thom thought, bitterly. He'd thought that Leija was worth it - he knew he still thought that somewhere. But she didn't share that - at least, not with him. "We were talking about my skills," he said, instead, as though his mother hadn't just said all of that. "I've been working on spells more recently - I think I'm getting better," he added, taking another bite of his food.

Ashbelle sighed heavily, and gave him a light Look for that, but she didn't press the subject. Not right now, anyhow. There might come a day where she brought it up again, but until then, it was considered dropped. She'd said her bit, he could do with it what he would. And currently that was probably filed under 'ignore', much like her initial talk of angels being trouble had been. Perhaps one day her son would learn to listen to her before he got bitten by something. She imagined it might come around the time he stopped having 'teen' in his age. "That's good, it should help you. You can go through and reward the house against everything again if you would like. It hasn't been done in a while. All of the markings I put in are in the closet under the stairs, against the back wall." All carefully hidden, thank you.

"I'll do that when I get home from school tomorrow," Thom agreed, grateful to have something to do. He wondered if there was any way that he could surreptitiously ward next door, but he didn't know how he'd do that and he couldn't ask - that would be toeing the line too much. He would work on figuring out whether there was anything he could do with the tree, now that they were using it more again.

Ashbelle's mind was running along the same lines, even if it was for entirely different reasons. "You could practice more by warding next door." she said. "As you said, with everything going on around here, it might not be too bad an idea to watch out for them. Are you going to be attending the funeral?" she asked, her voice going slightly more delicate at the last bit.

Thom was really glad that he was looking down at his food in that moment, because he could hide his moment of surprise better. Did she know? Had she guessed? Leija had worked it out... That thought distracted him with another sharp pang. That had only been days ago. Just days - when she'd come to him and told him that she knew what he was. Only days ago. And he'd thought she loved him there, and suddenly here they were. Had something happened? Some weirdness where he'd missed weeks, maybe months? For everything to change so swiftly? Or had she really just been toying with him the way it seemed to him that she must have been - playing him for a fool, seeing how deep she could lure him in before breaking his heart. None of this made any sense, except he knew that there was no way she could have ever loved him. "I - I could do that," he managed. "I'd feel better knowing that Isaac was protected," he added, warming to the subject a little. "Though I'd have to make sure his parents were out. Find the right time. They wouldn't have to know - right?" He looked up. "Because they don't know about all of this. Isaac had to tell them that we just got lost, last week. They don't know about... the rest." He paused, considering her question. "I don't know about the funeral - I didn't know her that well. I don't know if I should be there." Because the last time you talked to her, you abandoned her to demon cats.

"You should be there if you want to be there. That's a decision only you can make." Ashbelle said. She'd been to enough funerals in her time. She knew the thought process. "If you want to be, go. It's no one's business but your own. And as for them knowing--no. They don't need to know. I've done a lot of that in my time. Half the time it's much easier if they don't. Quick, quiet, no fuss, and it's one less thing you have to worry about in the grand scheme of things. I'm always a huge supporter of pre-emptive maintenance."

Thom took this in with due consideration. "Is there anything else I should be doing - generally?" he asked, knowing they were skirting around subjects, but they were good at that. Knowing where the lines were drawn, what they could and couldn't discuss. Keep it general, non-specific. They could be concerned about the populace at large, that was allowed. They could discuss preparation and skills. Anyone could do that, it wasn't a protector thing.

Ashbelle paused as she thought about that. "Keeping along those lines, possibly some more of that. Make sure there are safe places to go. Make sure they're known." Definitely let your protected know. Pound the point home if you have to. "I would take a few days and write down every situation you find conceivable, and some you don't think would happen but could be possible, and start figuring out contingency plans. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best." She took a drink again and paused in thought. "Gifts are always nice." she said, not connecting the statement to anything, but putting it out there as a way to get things to someone. She'd done a lot of that. "So is leaving things places, especially if no one can trace it back to you, or they don't know it's there at all."

"I'm good at gifts," Thom agreed with a small smile, letting his mother know that he'd already started on that tack. He'd have to think of more for her and making them non-traceable wasn't a problem - one of the delivery firms in town had a level of confidentiality he trusted and the internet was a joy when it came to anonymous giving. "I'll work on contingency plans," he agreed. And bolt holes - though he knew that it wouldn’t take much to make Kaysen consider here one of them. He'd already found her in his basement once, so the idea was already implanted. "And you'll set me up with a guy in town? I mean, I know you're busy and everything..."

"I'm never that busy." Ashbelle said immediately. "I'll have it set up for you tomorrow. Are there days specifically you're looking to take lessons? Times?" she asked. "If you write out a schedule for me, I can arrange it, I'm sure. Or as near as." And people tended to want to give Ashbelle her way, really. She had a lot of pull in the town and she wasn't afraid to use it now and then.

"I'll let you have a schedule of my current commitments by morning," Thom promised her, perking up a little at the thought that his mother would make time to teach him, grateful in ways that he couldn't quite pin down right now for that fact. "Thank you," he told her, putting what he couldn't say into those two words instead. "I... Thanks."

"You're welcome." Ashbelle said with a smile. She wanted to assure him that things would be alright, but couldn't quite do it. He'd get over the girlfriend, she was sure, but He was right about the fact that things were in fact getting worse in town. Worse, and worse, and they didn't seem to have any sign of stopping anytime soon, so she wouldn't do that to him. She didn't even know if he would believe her, but on the off chance that he did, and things got worse...no. All she could do was be there if everything crashed down, and she planned to be. Hopefully he knew she'd be there.

He wouldn't have believed her anyway, so he was grateful when she didn't try and say anything of the sort. He didn't think that things were going to be okay - maybe it was just because his entire world seemed to be collapsing around him, maybe it was actual fact, but right now, he didn't see how anything could possibly be alright. He pushed his food around his plate a little more, then set down his fork. "I'm kinda tired," he said, quietly. "I'm sleeping better now, but I'm still playing catch up. Do you mind if I skip the rest of dinner and call it an early night." Very early night, in fact.
se7enw0lfe: "No. Go ahead." she said. She paused. "I'm here, if you need anything." she added. Which of course, he knew, but she reiterated when she could. "Sleep well." she added, wondering how long he would be haunting their basement. She hoped it wasn't very long term, but she wasn't going to say anything about it.

"Thanks mom," Thom said, standing and leaning over to kiss her on the cheek. "I'll see you in the morning - sleep well."