a place that isn't home

who: dean and lullaby
where: all over the place
when: late afternoon onward

Lullaby knew Dean was on his way, she'd texted him earlier in the day to see if they could do something later, and he'd said he'd get there eventually. Lullaby's version of eventually was going to be slightly sooner, because she couldn't stand to be in the house for another second longer. Or on the property for that matter. So, she'd bundled up, because it was not a warm day out, really, and started walking. The dirt road was pretty long to begin with, and if she got to the end of it she'd just...stop and sit there to wait for him to drive up. It wasn't like there was going to be any other traffic on the road or anything. But she was exhausted feeling she was so tired from lack of sleep, and she just...wanted to be anyplace but that house. Absolutely anywhere. She'd perk up again when he got there...she always did, for more reasons than one. But for the moment, she was trudging up the road, hands buried in the front pocket of his hoodie that she kept swearing she was going to return to him. She had a scarf on too, and a hat, that had little bear-ears sewn onto it. She'd been bored. What she didn't need today was an umbrella...the sun hadn't shown up all day, and it hadn't rained either. It was one of those days where it was dreary, kinda dark, and generally unpleasant. That really hadn't helped out her whole stuck feeling and her twitchyness about wanting to get the hell out of that house for a while.

Dean turned down the road and had been surprised to see her walking - he knew that he was later than she could have expected had he been coming straight from school, but still. He'd had first aid immediately after school, and then he'd gone round to the old house to talk to Billy about a few things. Mostly, the state of her room. He'd had a few ideas about it that he wanted to talk to the other guy about. He'd also wanted a second opinion on the house and on Thia and he knew that Thia trusted Billy. Of his two tasks, the first had been accomplished - Billy was going to get Thia's room put back together again first and foremost, and then he was going to let Dean loose on it. He'd been on board with the teen's idea, thought it was a nice one. And agreed that nobody else needed to know - it'd be a nice surprise. As for the second, well, that had been rather less successful. It wasn't that Billy hadn't cared that Thia was uncomfortable, he just didn't have a whole lot to add there. Maddie was looking into it, as far as they could tell there was nothing threatening, or dangerous and nobody else except for Dean and Thia could feel anything wrong. It was just a mystery. Billy had, though, offered to go into Thia's dreams to see if he could get a better understanding of what was going on. That hadn't been anything Dean was was willing to ask him to do, but he hadn't turned it down either.

He slowed the car and pulled over next to her, wondering if she'd be able to manage the skewed door, or whether he'd be better to get out and open it for her.

She was relieved when the car pulled up and she made her way to it, eyeing the door with a wrinkled nose. She tried to get it open, really pulling hard on the handle, but it didn't quite work out for her. So she thunked her forehead down on the top of the vehicle. "I can't get iiinnnnn." she moaned, even if she didn't know if he'd hear her.

He heard her alright and, well, there was the answer to his question really. Dean got out of the car and walked round, grabbing the handle and giving a sharp tug-lift-yank that was needed to open the door. He was getting better at that. "I'm thinking of taking a hammer to it this weekend, see if I can bash the door back into shape," he told her as he opened the door fully and gestured with a flourish that she should get in. "Course, I might just fuck it up even more, but... May as well try - it's that or go round breaker's yards looking for a replacement."

She gave him a tired but genuine smile and flopped into the car. "Thank you." she said. "And...I don't really think that you could possibly make it worse. You'd have to try really hard." she observed, pulling her feet back a bit so he could slam it shut. "So the only way to go is up?" she suggested.

He shut the door and hurried round the other side, sliding back in again, though he made no attempt to drive off - they couldn't talk if he was driving. "Well, I could make it so the door won't shut at all," Dean pointed out. "But I'm willing to risk it - how are you feeling today?" he asked her.

She was curled on her side on the seat, which was comfortable despite the condition of the rest of the car. "Tired." she answered him honestly, because she was, and it was probably pretty obvious. "And I trust you not to hit the car so hard that the door won't shut at all. I have faith in your abilities to make things better. You can do it." she encouraged, giving him a cute little smile. She was teasing, just a little. Even if she did figure that he wouldn't mess it up, that he'd probably just fix it at least a little bit. He was a smart boy, and he knew how things worked. "You? How was school?" she asked, knowing he probably wasn't actually going to give her real information on school, but hey she might as well ask. It wasn't like it was Dean's favorite subject, but it wouldn't be her if she let it slide.

"It was, apparently 'pirate day' today - you'll note from my non-pirate-like attire that I gave that one a miss. Like I didn't do 60's day yesterday and I'm not intending on doing pyjama day tomorrow either," he told her, wondering whether the fact that she was tired was a good excuse for him to shuffle over and put his arm around her, give her energy. Or something.

She giggled a little. "Homecoming week." she said. "I forgot it was getting around that time. Pirate day you didn't indulge in? Why Dean." she said, tsking, and sounding overly dramatic. "People will say you don't have any school spirit." She tilted her head to the side and eyed him. "I'm trying to picture you with an eye patch and a big hoop earring. Have to say, it's really a rough kind of image switch. I don't think I can actually manage it."

"'School spirit'? God, please - you're sounding like Janice. I swear - if you start saying 'ra ra ra' I'm just going to have to... I dunno, but it won't be pretty," he mock-threatened. "But no, I'm not a pirate and going around all day saying 'mwha, me hearties' like half the people at school did?" he questioned, actually doing a pirate impression, complete with face. "Not really me either."

That made her giggle, a little surprised one that had her sitting up more properly. "Oh god, do that again!" she said. "That was awesome. All you need is a parrot and an eyepatch and you'd be golden." she assessed, obviously very amused with him at that point. Internally, she was kind of feeling pangs of what she was missing. Homecoming week had always been fun because it was pretty much a week where people got to be silly and no one took their classes that seriously. Even a lot of the teachers dressed up and participated. And...she wasn't there. She couldn't be doing things with everyone else and she was going to miss the dance, too. Don't start, Lullaby, okay? Not right now. You're already feeling kind of shitty don't go and make that worse.

"Hey - I thought that you couldn't imagine me with an eyepatch?" Dean challenged. "What, an accent and an impression completely changes your mind on that, does it?" he teased.

"Yeah but I also didn't figure I could picture you doing that pirate face thing, but that really sold me." she informed him. "So you'd have to get one to complete the image. I'd have to see though, so I could properly get a picture of it all. And yes, an accent and impression apparently do worlds for my ability to imagine things. I'm totally sold on you being a pirate. You just need all the garb, and then we can steal a ship, and set sail. It'll be great." She paused. "Because in this little imaginary fantasy I'm part of the pirate package deal thing. I could learn to make a good deck wench or something."

"A 'deck wench'?" Dean asked, doubtfully. "I'm not sure there's even any such thing. And anyway, I don't do the pirate thing - you know how I feel about fancy dress. It's just not me. I'm the miserable bugger that doesn't go in for that type of thing," he reminded her, coming to a realisation that he'd been flirting again. He'd promised himself he was going to stop that nonsense.

"I used it in a sentence, there are now such things as deck wenches. I've just made them up. So there. They exist now." Lullaby insisted. She gave him a cute smiley sort of expression, that was just a touch impish. "And pirates don't dress fancy, they dress raggedly. Or so says Disney. But okay if you weren't going to be a pirate because they're too fancy, what would you go in for?" she challenged. "It better be good, I liked the stealing a ship thing."

"Then I'm going to disappoint, I think - I'm just me. What you see is what you get and everything," he shrugged. "Kinda boring really - you deserve a more interesting best friend to keep you entertained."

She looked at him, and smiled, a genuine, sweet sort of smile that she couldn't have suppressed if she'd tried. Which she didn't. What she did suppress was the urge to lean over, kiss his cheek and give him a hug. "I think you do just fine, Mr. Conway." she told him. And there was that note of truth to it, too, it carried in her tone. "I'm not disappointed at all." Cue him deciding now is a good time to start the car moving. she predicted.

Dean returned her smile a little then did exactly as predicted and turned to the wheel, glancing over just to say. "So - orphanage? Since you're tired - and I'm sure being out hasn't helped," he pointed out, before turning back and pulling the car away from the side of the road and concentrating hard, executing a slow and wobbly three point turn before heading them back toward the main road.

She almost thought for a second there that he wasn't going to immediately jump to cutting off communication effectively but then he did. She didn't mind too much though. "Take me anywhere you want to go." Lullaby said, curling back up properly on the seat again. She reached up to take her bear-ear hat off, and settled to watch him while he wasn't paying attention to her. She'd kind of picked up on the fact now that she enjoyed that. She also wasn't examining that pretty much at all. In fact, to say she was ignoring the shit out of it would probably be accurate.

It was comments like that one that reminded Dean just how oblivious she was. That, coupled with her views on lines and her declaration she had none. Because - if she was even slightly aware... That was a loaded statement, really, wasn't it? But he headed them toward the orphanage anyway, because she was oblivious and she didn't mean it like that - so much so that it wouldn't even occur to her that it could be meant like that.

When she recognized where he was driving, she sat up a little bit. "Dean, can I try something?" she asked, reaching over to put one hand on his shoulder. She only recognized she'd done it after she realized that it was probably weird. But...she hadn't given him a hug yet, or sat over by him, or anything, and...now she was touching his shoulder. For like...no reason. That was awesome of her, and she took it back, clasping her hands in her lap instead. "I don't want to..." she trailed off a second. "I'd like to see if I can channel for you without being there. If I could draw off of you to do it."

Dean had jumped a little as she touched him, not expecting that. And then, of course, he looked at her and the car swerved. He braked and pulled over, glad that they were still out of town. He needed to learn better than this. He slowed the car to a stop and put on the parking brake, before turning to her. "But you're tired anyway," he reminded her, not saying no.

"I'm tired cuz I haven't been sleeping." she admitted, sort of shrinking back a little more. She'd of course seen the jump he'd done and she felt bad about it. Well that was a lesson for her, now wasn't it? Yes, it was. So...she'd not do that. "I mean, yeah, there's the energy issue but...anyways, I just want to see if I can do it without having to have that source. Okay? Just--just in case." Just in case something stupid happens again and we're holed up for a week someplace due to siege of some kind. I want to know if I can still help you.

"You don't have to go back there tonight, you know," Dean told her, knowing he told her this often. "We can figure something out - not sleeping it's - it's not good for you. Just say the word and we'll - you just have to say," he told her. That house. He hated that house.

She gave him a weak little half smile, and wished to hell she could just say what she wanted to. 'yes, for the love of all that is holy take me away from that house. It doesn't like me. It still doesn't like me. I don't get used to it, it's just one long, constant bad feeling and I can't sleep. I can't concentrate well. I don't want to be there, please take me away'. Yeah she wasn't ever going to say that. Ever ever ever. Watching his eyes for a few long moments, she glanced away, then held out her hand to him, wanting him to hand over his so she could get on with her experiment. But she wasn't going to take his hand like she usually would, where she'd just snag it and pull it over.

He held her gaze as she looked at him, holding his breath at the same time, until she looked away and he exhaled, knowing that she wasn't going to tell him what he wanted to hear - that she'd let him take her away from that place. He'd not really expected it, he knew - but he'd hoped. He took her hand and waited.

Lullaby drew in a deep breath, clasped his hand, and pulled it over just a little. Not enough to make him move, but just making herself more comfortable. She wrapped her other hand around his as well, and started to draw off of him. She opened up the channel as wide as she could with the energy he provided, and started to slowly draw in the rest from him. It was slightly different, since it was the same source, but she didn't feel any worse as she did it. She of course made sure she wasn't overloading herself, clearing him out fast or anything. Though, considering she'd been doing it on a daily basis, there was less to clear anyways. He had a relatively low level that built up, and if it kept building obviously it would get worse and worse, but since she kept clearing it, it wasn't that overwhelming. When she was finished, she opened her eyes, and smiled. "...and all was well again." she said. It was possible she forgot to give him his hand back.

He ticked his eyes away from her face as she opened her eyes, so she wouldn't catch him staring. "Erm, thanks," he told her. "I - You - thank you," he added, starting to want to tell her just how much he appreciated that and what a difference it made to his life and everything, but not knowing how to put that into words.

"You're welcome." she said, now realizing that she still had his hand. It was warm in hers, and her fingers had warmed up a little bit in the process. She'd been a little cold from her walk. Which was a detail she didn't need to be focusing on, or thinking about. So she let him go, and shoved her hands back into the hoodie's front pocket. "So..." she quirked a little half smile that didn't actually last that long. "Take me somewhere you want to go." she said, stressing the important part there.

"You're still tired - the orphanage would still help you get some energy back," he pointed out, feeling the loss of her hand. He might have been tempted to reclaim it, but even if he'd been able to come up with a good excuse, she'd hidden them in her - his - hoodie, hadn't she?

She made a face at him. "And we've been there like...most days. It's cold and it's cold out, and I just kinda wanna go someplace with you that isn't somewhere that feels so..." she paused, trying to figure out the word. "Required." she landed on. "I really don't care where we go, Dean, just so long as it's someplace you actually want to be."

I'm already somewhere I want to be. No, mate, seriously - you can't say that out loud, he told himself, firmly. "Okay, welllll - how about we go for a drive, find a town where they won't know you on sight and, I dunno, find a cinema. Or grab a pizza - but with less food, since neither of us is big with that. Play normal for a while," he suggested to her.

She actually perked up at that. "Really?" she asked. That sounded...kinda too good to be true, actually. She knew it shouldn't, but it did. Then she smiled. And even if she still looked a little tired, it was bright and genuine. "I'd love that." she said. "Do we have the gas money? Or...any money?" she asked. She was thinking of towns that were near enough that it wouldn't be a huge hassle, but were far enough away no one would recognize her at all. There was Munising. Or they could make the trip to Escanaba, or Iron Mountain...hm.

"I have some - it's the beginning of the month, mum just sent my allowance across, so we're golden," he assured her. "You'll have to tell me where to go and everything, but I know I'd like to get away for a while. And - I know we were talking about doing that this weekend, but you asked me what I'd like and everything. And - yeah. That I'd like."

"You want to get out of town too?" she asked. She was hoping this wasn't purely for her benefit, but he had confirmed it was what he wanted...so she was going to go for it. "Okay. You get a couple choices. There's Munising, which is probably closest, but also has the least to do. There's Iron Mountain, which is way bigger, has way more to do, but is kinda far. Like, an hour's drive. There's Escanaba, which is I think maybe like, a tiny bit closer than Iron Mountain, but I don't know as well either so I dunno what there is to do there." she said.

"Let's go to Iron Mountain," Dean decided after a moment's thought. "Though - could you text Sophie and warn her I'm going to be late home? And you'd better tell her I don't have any homework to do tonight because of.... homecoming. Yeah, tell her that," Dean decided.

Lullaby giggled a little and took out her phone. "Am I contributing to you being a delinquent, and without even trying?" she asked. "And am I totally lying here? Do you have homework, and you're just going to be blowing it off to spend time with me in a random town?" she asked, arching a brow at him and smirking faintly.

"I'm not gonna tell you - reasonable deniability," he told her, though the truth was that the teachers hadn't really been giving that much out this week, with homecoming and everything and he didn't have anything due the next day, thus - it could be done over the weekend. Simple.

She laughed, and reached across to poke him in the side playfully. "Reasonable deniability. Fine, I'll just assume that you're a perfect little angel and aren't actually putting anything off, cuz you would never ever do that in a million years." she teased. She also keyed in the messages to Sophie, vaguely wondering why he wasn't doing this, unless she was less likely to protest if Lullaby was the one doing the asking. Or telling. Whatever.

Dean wasn't doing that because the moment she'd replied, he pulled away, heading them down the road. He thought he knew the vague direction of where they were headed, but he'd not been there before and he wasn't familiar with the roads outside of Marquette - this could get interesting.

"You realize you've condemned yourself to like...an hour of silence, right?" Lullaby asked absently, waiting for Sophie's message back. "Unless you get better at talking without looking at me?" Technically, he should be able to pull that off without a hitch, because he didn't have to look at her when he spoke. It was harder for her to communicate with him than the other way around. She sounded amused, though.

Dean bit his lips slightly, torn between replying and risking an accident and just not replying. It was like a twitch and in the end he gave in, slowing a little as he looked over. "Habit. Sorry. Radio?" he suggested, cutting what he had to say down to the bare minimum as he looked back at the road.

"Sure. We can practice you talking and not looking at me some time when you're not driving someplace you've never even been." she said, leaning over to turn the radio on, and she searched through a few stations. "Okay there's the oldies station, the country station, the kinda older rock station, the new pop crap station...there's a couple of those, and college radio. I guess. I don't listen to the radio much." For obvious reasons.

There was another minute or so of Dean weighing up with frustration what he wanted to say, before he actually spoke, the frustration written all over his face as he looked at her for a second, still speaking this time as he got the car out of its wobble. "Me neither. Sorry."

She winced faintly at the frustration level, and gave him a sympathetic sort of look even if he didn't see it. She switched to the older rock station, because it was better than nothing, and while sometimes she liked the college radio station, a good sixty percent of the time she had no clue whatsoever what was even being played. So they were going to be hit up with like...early nineties stuff instead, and random seventies rock, and a few other random bits. Though the station did seem to have a rule that they had to play something Pink Floyd every hour without fail.

Dean settled into the drive as they headed further out of town, letting the radio fill in for the lack of talking, even if he doubted either of them was actually listening to it. but, maybe it'd help his problem - he always had so much to say to her.

Lullaby had a whole lot to talk to Dean about too, but didn't figure getting into any of it was a good idea while he was driving, and she didn't want to frustrate him further. Soooo, she just didn't say anything, and smiled as they eventually pulled into Iron Mountain. "Okay there's two towns here. Kinda making one big town, because they're on top of one another. Iron Mountain and Kingsford. Not that you needed to know that or anything, but there you have it." she said. "There's a pretty park up off the road at that second light up there." she said.

Dean made himself not look round as she talked, though, with the radio blasting, he didn't get all of what she said, losing the inflections in the noise. he got the park part though and pulled over before it, turning off the engine. "So - what's this thing you Americans have for random names?" he asked, finally able to talk to her. "Caleb was talking about a town he passed through that was called 'Big Cabin'." Which reminded him of what his friend had apparently found there, and the girl on the internet. And the fact that he still hadn't heard from the guy. Not good.

"Big Cabin?" Lullaby asked, before giggling. "Okay that's random. That's fantastically random, even. All I can say is up here? Most of the names are native american, so that's why they're kinda...funky." she said. "Like Ishpeming and Negaunee are native american. Marquette was after some guy who came through who...I don't know. Settled things or something. Then there's Baraga, which was after a bishop, I think, and if we ever take a ride out that way? We'll see Bishop Baraga, this huge ass statue randomly stuck up on a cliff, so it overlooks the water and roads and stuff." She looked out the window, and saw there were other people around, which made her nervous, but...they'd come here for a reason, right? So she could go outside even if there were people and everything, and they weren't in Marquette. He'd wanted to be somewhere else, they were now. Only they were still in the car. So she smiled at him. "Are we getting out?" she asked. And okay, she couldn't quite help the nervous sort of light excitement that was running through her.

"I was actually talking about 'Iron Mountain' - my current running theory was that the settlers ran out of originality long before they hit the mid-west," he told her, before opening his door and getting out, walking round to open her side. "And yes, we're getting out." And he was ignoring the Big Cabin issues.

"Well that definitely does cover the 'unoriginal' thing. It was mountainy and there was lots of iron laying around?" she suggested. "I say it's slightly less silly than 'big cabin' though. Because really..." she said, getting out, and she stepped closer to him without thinking about it, looking around all over the place, and she resisted reaching up to pull the hood up. She put her hat back on though. Her ridiculous, stupid hat.

"Nobody knows you," Dean told her as he saw her looking around. "And anyway, if they see you, all they're going to see is that hat - they're not going to be looking at your face. Come on - want to head into the park, or find somewhere inside?" he asked her.

She nodded, looking up at him, then she made a face and poked him in the stomach. "Are you dissing my cute teddybear hat?" she asked, wondering if she could get away with snagging his hand, and in the end, she did it anyways, because she kind of wanted the support...not to mention she could draw energy easier that way, and make up for skipping the orphanage today. She leaned back, like she usually did, to tug him forward. "Let's walk around the park first, then we can find somewhere inside, when I'm a frozen little bunny."

He stepped into place beside her as they walked, close and then slowly drifting out a little as he realised, though he didn't let go of her hand - she could draw off him better with touch, he decided, giving himself the excuse. "Yeah, I'm dissing your hat. Though more 'making fun', because I don't really know what 'dissing' is," he told her.

"You don't know what dissing is?" Lullaby asked. "Well that's got to change. Okay. Dissing. Like...making fun of things, putting them down. You are totally dissing my hat, just because it's got cute teddybear ears on it. So...same thing, basically." she said. "I'd ask you if you're embarrassed to be seen with me with it on, but you already are being seen with me, so that's out. Of course, if you asked really nicely, I could probably take pity on you and take it off."

"I'm not embarrassed to be seen with you - though that probably has more to do with you than with the hat," he informed her as they followed the path in the park around at a slow pace. This was weird, he realised - he was overly aware that there were other people around. And it was insane, but he felt twitchy not having his gun on him. He needed his head examined.

Lullaby looked around at everything at once, while they walked for a few minutes. She kept sort of half walking closer to him, then remembering herself and drifting back again. When they got closer to groups of people, that was when she would start to close in. She wasn't getting any looks though. Nope, not at all. They were just two people, out for a walk, as far as anyone else was concerned. She was smiling, however. Even if her behavior unconsciously spoke of nerves, she was still smiling. Appreciating being outside in public in the daytime. "Well at least we know you're not hung up on appearances..." she said finally turning her attention back to him, and she beamed at him.

When she started to drift in as they walked, Dean started to drift away from her - until he realised that she was doing it when they got near to people and then he let her hand go completely and stepped round the back of her so he was walking on her other side, before putting an arm around her shoulders and drawing her in. The reposition would have actually meant something if he's been carrying, but he wasn't. Still, it would have felt odd on the other side. He felt better with his arm around her though - like there was less issue of anyone spying her, that protective urge kicked up a little.

She didn't fight him to keep his hand or anything but had felt a little weird for about two seconds, until she suddenly had an arm around her instead, which worked out just as well for her. She could deal with that. She hadn't really wanted to make him uncomfortable or the like, and she'd been curious if that was the case, but she wasn't overthinking it. She was determined to not overthink things right this second, because she was happy to be outside. Which was still shining through for her, and she was still smiley. Pushing in on the corners of her mind, however, were some of the things she'd wanted to talk to him about in the first place. "I went for a walk last night." she told him, glancing up at him as they walked.

He looked at her, absently noting that this gave a different angle. They didn't normally walk like this, but it made him feel better in ways that were actually totally allowed. Platonic ways. "You did?" he asked her, assuming she meant early on, after he'd left.

She was looking up at him in return, thinking much the same thing. That it was kinda different to walk like this, but not in an uncomfortable sort of way. "Yeah. Well. Technically it was early this morning. I met someone. A girl named Alexis. I guess she goes to school with you now, she's new." she explained. She made a little bit of a cute face. "And I need a cover story that doesn't sound like I have like...crazy parents that keep me under lock and key and homeschool me."

"You don't need a cover story - you're nearly nineteen, you don't attend school anymore," Dean replied without missing a beat, the answer seeming obvious to him. "And wait - what? How early this morning?" he asked, pressing more this time.

She made a tiny face. "I know but I don't feel nineteen, and I don't actually actively remember I'm not." she said. "But you're right. Sorry." she said, sighing internally. That was going to take a long time to get used to. "And...I dunno. After three?" she suggested. Then, quickly put in there the last bit. "I left you a note."

"Well, you'd better get used to it - did you remember your name?" he asked her, though the lecture wasn't at all unkind and it was definitely overshadowed by the rest. "You went out? Alone? In the middle of the night?" he asked her, unable to believe that. "And - where. Thia? Where did you leave me a note? Not somewhere I could get it, obviously. Least you could have done was text me," he told her, vaguely aware that he may be being unreasonable here.

"Yeah, I remembered the name." Lullaby assured him. She'd been very sure for that. She frowned a touch at the rest of it. "On my bedside table? I promised I'd leave you a note, so I left you one. I didn't want to wake you up though, and I'm pretty sure if I texted you, that would have done it. But if anything happened and you just happened to come by, you wouldn't worry because you'd know I was just gone for a walk. Plus I had my phone on me, in case of an emergency." Somehow she wasn't sure that would placate him.

Dean wondered if he'd mentioned that he hated that house. And her in it. Or, in fact, her anywhere that wasn't near him. He was a creepy stalker, he really was. "You should be living somewhere you can actually get some sleep," he said instead of further complaint - the fact he knew he was being grossly unreasonable had him backing off any further opinion.

She couldn't argue with him there, and thought about how when she'd first come upon Alexis, she'd been wishing he were there. Her armed escort, even if currently he was just her escort without the armed part. That didn't actually seem to make a difference in her head...she still felt better and safer with him there. "I know." she said. "But...anyways, I met a girl, she was nice, and we're going to hang out sometime. She was a little strange, I guess...but...hey, yay for new friends?" she suggested.

"You're changing the subject," Dean told her, lightly. Except she wasn't - that had been her original point, he knew that. She was just deflecting off of his concerns. "I mean - new friend is good. But - strange how? Please tell me not 'strange like she could turn out to be a vampire' strange. If you're getting together with her again, it'll be in the daytime, right?" he pressed.

"Was the subject that I should be living someplace I can sleep properly?" Lullaby asked, wondering which subject she was supposedly changing. "I agreed, and everything. Or are you still twitching over the fact that I went out again?" she asked. And she supposed that really, she probably could be pissy about that, only she wasn't and that was in her tone. Intellectually, she understood she was a big girl and could make her own decisions and didn't necessarily require him to be someone who tried to tell her what she could and couldn't do or where she should and shouldn't live in roundabout ways, through disapproval, but she got that he was just worried. So, she could handle it, just so long as he didn't start actually telling her she wasn't 'allowed' to do things. So long as it stayed in that stage of disapproval where he could express his opinion with ease, but didn't graduate into full on ordering her around, he was within dealable limits. Though, even if he did start doing that, they both knew perfectly well she was under no obligation to listen to him. They worked like that on a lot of levels. They had strong opinions, said opinions were duly noted, and when required, gently ignored. "I think I would have noticed she was a vampire, after hanging out with her for a while, and we're getting together in the daytime, in theory. That was part of the plan anyways." she explained. "And weird like...she knows about the weird and that was one of the first things that got discussed. Like...I guess she just randomly tells people this stuff. I thought that was kinda...strange. So personality-weird, not anything else. And you know, it really says something about our lives that I had to clarify that. That a statement like that really did need the disclaimer of 'no she isn't a creature of the night'." she finished. Then paused and added something else. "Would it make you feel any better to know that when I first saw her, I'd wished you were there?" she asked.

"That was one of the subjects, yes. And, you know - if you'd feel better with me around, you just have to call me," he pointed out in relation to her final question. "I just... After everything that's gone on, I worry about you, y'know? Like you'd worry about me if I went off wandering in the middle of the night, alone. There's - we know there's badness out there. We don't even know what it all is." Plus, we still haven't found your father. "And - Billy didn't know that guy was a vampire when he was attacked, so they're obviously not all as obvious as the ones that hit town."

One of us carries a gun, and is a ridiculously good shot. That would be you. Lullaby thought. Though that didn't change the fact that he was right, she would worry about him if he was off wandering around by himself. She also was thinking about the fact that the last time she'd gone out for a walk, when she'd visited her grave, she had run into a vampire, and it hadn't hurt her at all. Which...as she looked up at him, she figured Dean could probably live the rest of his life happily and never know that. All it would do is freak him out more. "You can't babysit me all the time." she said. "You were asleep, or you should have been, and I wasn't going to bother you in the middle of the night, just because I was restless. That would be really really unfair, to expect you to just...I dunno. Come with me, when it would be a huge hassle, and you have school, and we're not just across the hall from each other anymore, and..." she sighed.

Then come back home and be across the hall from me again, Dean thought. But - he couldn't keep on with that like a broken record. She'd even agreed with him that she should be elsewhere than she was now, yet there was no suggestion she was coming home. She clearly didn't intend to, so he should just shut up about that. "It's not babysitting, Thia. And I know, I just..." He didn't know how to end that acceptably, so he simply let it trail off, hoping she'd get it.

"You worry." she finished for him. "I know you do. And I'm sorry you do, and I don't mean to make you worry. I just...sometimes need to not be stuck in that house. Or anywhere, I don't know." she said, reaching up to tuck her hair behind her ears properly, and she looked down for a few moments as she gathered her thoughts. "And it feels like babysitting. Like...you'd just want to go with me because you happen to be better at defending yourself than I am. You'd want me to take you with because you'd want to make sure nothing happened to me, and that feels like babysitting. That feels like..." she again had to trail off for a second so she could find wording. "It feels like I'm your responsibility, not your best friend."

"You're not my responsibility - that suggests that this is something I have to do, whether I like it or not. That's - it's not like that," Dean told her, stopping and turning to her, his arm slipping down from her shoulder. "I want to be there for you. It's not babysitting, it's..." He broke off and looked down, then ticked his eyes back to hers. "I'm sorry - I just - you're right, of course. And I'm just... Stupid and overprotective and... I'm sorry."

"You're not stupid." she said first. Whenever he said that, she always corrected that immediately. She also stepped closer, putting her arms up around his neck. "And don't be sorry, either." she added, because she didn't really feel like he had anything to apologize for. Not really. "I can't justify to myself calling you in the middle of the night to come get me so I can go for a walk." It was way too much to ask of him. "And I'd rather you be overprotective than not care at all, I just don't quite know how to compromise here. I want to, I'd like to figure something out that makes you feel better but not be like...I don't know. On call. You know I'd text you if anything really serious was happening, right?"

He slipped his arms around her waist and looked down at her - only to feel too close, too open, especially given the way he'd been acting lately. He took a step back, out of her hold, thrusting his hands into the pockets of his jacket. "The compromise is for me to grow a brain and stop worrying so much. Come on - let's find somewhere inside, it's getting cold," he said.

Lullaby stared at him a hurt expression flickering over her features. She shoved her hands into the front pocket of his hoodie, and tried to think of something to say. She didn't really want it to just...stop like that. As much as she hated to think about it, she was starting to wonder if she shouldn't just hide it from him. Just do what she was going to do, hope she didn't get hurt, and hope there wasn't anything she wanted to share with him when she was out. Like meeting someone new for the first time pretty much since she'd died. In the end she couldn't think of anything, and instead she just nodded, and started to walk past him, not especially paying attention to where she was heading, but there were buildings over that way. He'd said inside.

He caught the expression and opened his mouth to say something, only then she was walking away. He cursed himself for a fool, and a foolish one at that and followed, saying a little behind her, not saying a word.

She walked til they were at the edge of the park, then stopped, half looking around. There were a lot of stores and the like downtown, a lot of little restaurants. But neither of them ate a lot. Though...Dean could probably use some food, regardless. "There's a little bar slash pizza place up that way." she said, gesturing. "Called The Library."

"Sounds good," Dean said, but without much enthusiasm, still beating himself up over fucking up again. He was good at that - he should just learn to keep his mouth shut and to not get into situations where they were too up close and personal for him to handle.

Leading them there was no issue. It was hard to miss. She remembered liking it because it was one of those places that was a basement establishment, which meant they had to walk down concrete steps to get to the place, and all the windows were tiny street-level ones. Inside, it was a dimly lit sort of place, but Lullaby quickly assessed it was light enough that she wasn't being seen through. It was cozy, small, and the entire place floor to ceiling was lined with book shelves. There were newer books in one section, but really? Most of them were old. She smiled a little, because...god, it had been a long time since she'd been there. The last time when she was maybe thirteen or so. Taking off her hat, she shoved it into the front pocket, and then tugged the hoodie off too, since it was more than warm in there. She watched Dean out of the corner of her eye, stepping off to the side so she could get a better look at him...considering he'd taken to walking behind her in the past few minutes or so.

Dean slipped off his jacket as they entered the warmth of the place, but he was firmly following her lead as he looked around. "Seems nice," he offered, glancing over at her.

She gave a light smile, then glanced back over as a waitress showed up to seat them. She asked if they could have the back round table, and they were obliged. "I'm antisocial. Whenever I go to places to eat I always want to sit off by myself." she said, a weird little tidbit he wouldn't ever have known otherwise. She sat down, and hung the hoodie up on the little coat hook nearby.

Dean hung up his jacket next to the hoodie and sat down, pushing the sleeves of his shirt up a little so that they were resting just below his elbows. "Why?" he asked her, glad to go with the new subject. Though, when they'd had a few minutes of not talking really, could it even be called 'new'? he wasn't sure.

She thought about it. "I think it kinda comes from being deaf?" she said. "Like...there's a lot going on around you if you're in the middle of a busy restaurant. So, if I'm trying to concentrate on what one person is saying, then it's harder for me to do with a ton of people around. And most people are trying to hear me, and I know I'm not very loud. So it makes communication harder. Especially if I'm with more than one person, which I know, I'm not right now or anything, but still. It's kind of ingrained now." she explained. "Like I sat outside at lunch for as long as possible during the school year, and then in the winter, I usually found a classroom to eat in instead of eating in the lunch room or whatever. It was kind of...overwhelming."

He smiled slightly. "Yeah, I know about overwhelming," he agreed. "I was just never good at big groups. One on one? Fine. But with groups, I just kinda shut up and stayed in a corner, unless someone specifically came to talk to me. Same when I went out to eat and stuff. I'd just get really quiet - I couldn't concentrate on everything that was going on everywhere. It was just too much," he admitted, knowing she'd understand. He'd never really discussed it with anyone else, but Thia knew.

She did, and she nodded, making a little bit of a cute face. "Yeah, otherwise it gets to be too confusing and you're missing things and people have to repeat themselves, and...best to avoid all that, it's less frustrating for everyone. And for me, I don't have to repeat myself six hundred times...I tend to get really quiet unless directly spoken to as well in situations like that. Like I'll make an effort to follow what's going on, it's just hard to participate."

"Right, exactly - and I don't know who gets more frustrated at endless 'what?'s - me or the person I'm talking to," Dean agreed, before giving her a little smile. "I've never had that problem with you," he told her. He hadn't - not ever. It was one of the reasons he'd liked her in the first place. Why he'd found her so easy to talk to. Sure, she was easy to talk to, but she was also literally easy to talk to - she did all the things he liked and needed in communication. She always looked at him when she was speaking, she walked with him, not behind him or in front of him - that list of tiny things that irritated him about most people and which were entirely absent in her.

She smirked a little at that. "Exactly. I don't like having to say something over and over either, it's like by the time someone actually gets it? The point is missing anyways. Like I'll never ever in my life try to tell a joke at a party. It just won't happen and then there's that uncomfortable bit where people put it together, but because the timing was so dragged out it loses it's funny." Propping her head on her hand, she looked at him for a long moment, and smiled softly. "I never have any of those problems with you either." she said. "You don't miss anything I'm saying either, even if I'm quiet. And I don't miss what you're saying. You're always really good about making sure that I can hear you, even when we're not in a situation where I can see you properly. Which...I'm not sure if I ever properly told you I appreciate, but I really do."

Dean smiled a little, but shrugged it off. "Not anything I wouldn't do anyway," he told her, brushing away the compliment as always - though at least he'd managed to not say that everyone did that this time. He knew they didn't, after all. "Oh, which - did I tell you? Joshua invited me to a party tomorrow night..." he told her.

She had been going to say something further, but then he mentioned the party. "No, you didn't tell me. But hey, a party should be fun." she said. She was wondering if it was for homecoming, or some like...college party or something, but didn't feel like it was her business to ask. "Don't get yourself hungover again." she teased lightly, partially reaching out to poke him in the arm but she stopped herself short, and clasped her hands together on her lap under the table instead. Outside the invisible timer had gone off, she was positive, so she'd need to not be touching him.

"I won't," he promised. "You - you don't mind? I mean, I'd... That is I wish... It'd be nice if you could... But - it's a, well, in Marquette and..." He broke off, telling himself just to cut his losses and shut the fuck up. After all, there was no reason why he shouldn't go to a party without her and she couldn't go anyway and she knew that and even if she could, he really didn't want to be asking her to go with him, though if he did, he could easily qualify that it'd just be as friends, so. But she couldn't, so he should just leave it.

She watched the process of him tripping over his words in a fantastic display of vocabulary failure, and was left blinking, and not entirely sure what she should address first. Which she was saved for a minute, because a waitress came over, but Lullaby told her they'd need a couple of minutes more, but hey at least they had menus now--which she ignored, in light of attempting to figure out what to say. "Okay, I'm not sure exactly where to start? So I'm just gonna start talking." she eventually landed on. This could go badly. "It's sweet that you wish I could go with you." she said. "And if I could be someone else for a night, I would. I'd love to, even. Even with all those issues we just discussed that would all be happening for a few hours at a shot that a party would have? I'd still love to go. But yeah, I can't, but anyways, it's still sweet of you to wish I could go with. I'm um. I'm not sure why you'd think I'd mind though. You're you, you're gonna get invited to parties, and you should go, and I don't know why you'd think I'd mind in the first place, I know that you need to like...spend time with other people and everything and I kinda don't like the idea that you do think that I would mind? Or that if I did for some reason become that weird crazy girl who wanted you to only hang out with her and get all possessive and smothering and everything that you would take that into account...I'm not--I don't get a say, Dean." She made an attempt at a smile, but didn't quite manage so she abandoned that. "Go to the party. Have fun. Don't drink too much, or eat something before you start drinking." she added. "There'll be a dance on Saturday, too. Be part of the school, and part of everything."

"Course you get a say," Dean told her, not even glancing at the menu. He'd never really seen the point of menus - when he ate out he just randomly picked something off the list and then didn't eat it. It all tasted the same to him anyhow. "And - I know you wouldn't mind, really. I just... You wouldn't be you if you were the kind of person who'd mind. I guess, it's - I mind, if that makes sense? I mind that I still get to do all those things that you don't get to do anymore. And I know you don't mind me doing them, but still, I just - when I am, I just - I think of you and it's like... It's not fair. That's all. And I'm not going to the dance on Saturday. I couldn't do two nights in a row. And even if I don't drink much on Friday I know there's... I might end up with a migraine," he told her, clutching at that excuse. "Two nights in a row would just be asking for trouble, so I'll just - stay somewhere quiet."

She followed, and felt all sorts of emotions that she couldn't quite identify. And she wasn't looking to, either. It was confusing to say the least. They were all mixed up together, some good, some bad, and they all flowed around and into one another so she couldn't pick anything out to really land on. She kept looking at him, for a long span of moments as that confusion didn't clear in the slightest, and then looked down, at the little generic candle on the table. They were cheap, lame little candles that a lot of places had, a fat red holder with facets cut into the side, a scentless oil votive burning inside. It gave the table a warm glow. All of them together gave the whole place a warm feel. Why did this feel more important to her than it probably should? It felt important. It felt like a lot. Maybe she was being overly emotional due to stress and lack of sleep. Or maybe it was important, and she just didn't want to look too hard at any of it. It all played into one of the things she kept waiting for. She understood that. About how she always figured that Dean really needed to spend more time with the living. How honestly, he needed to get out of the house more. Meet new people, make other friends. Do things that were flat out healthier for him than hanging out with her, and taking care of her. Hell. He was even trying to do that even though they weren't under the same roof anymore. "You're supposed to get to do all those things, okay?" she said eventually, ticking her eyes back up to his, and seeing bright afterimages of the candle flame in her vision. "You didn't--" die "--you're just supposed to. And yeah, it really sucks that I can't anymore but that doesn't mean you shouldn't, or that you should feel bad because I can't, and that's not fair at all either, and you shouldn't have to feel like that and it shouldn't effect what you do and don't do and...and even if you are hung over I can fix that for you before you went to the dance, I don't know about a migraine, but I just...I don't get a...or if I do get a say then I say you go, and have fun, and do all those things, and go to the dance, and Dean, I--" please don't do this to me. Please don't make me into your excuse. Please please please. Please tell me I'm not the reason that you're shutting yourself off when you don't have to be, because I don't think I can handle that. Please tell me that I'm not some black mark of guilt over your life. God I don't want to be that, I don't ever want to be that...

"I don't want to go to the dance, Thia," he told her, starting to reach for her hand and then stopping himself. He plucked a paper napkin from the dispenser and began to play with that instead. "If I wanted to go, I'd go - I don't want to go. I'm not - I'm not all that fussed. If you don't believe me, ask Andy - he's been asking about you recently anyhow, wondering where you've got to. I told him you'd moved out and he's been asking for your email and stuff," he told her, deflecting things.

She didn't say anything for a few long moments, because she was dealing with the fact that her stomach seemed to have dropped out. She quite abruptly didn't feel well. Mostly it was because he just...brushed off almost everything. "You said you mind." she said, voice quieter than usual. "That when you're out doing things that I can't, that you..." She broke off there, and shut up. She could feel that she was really upset, and didn't know if she could swallow it back down as quickly as she should. She was twisting the ring he'd given her around and around her finger beneath the table, where she still had her hands. She was having trouble looking at him, but of course had to keep glancing back so she didn't miss what he said.

"Do you really think I could go out and not wish you were there?" with me. He thrust that thought to the back of his mind. It was unneeded, the sentiment remained the same without it. "You're my best friend, Thia - I want to share things with you. I miss you when you're not there. And yeah, when I remember why you're not there, I think life's pretty fucking unfair. But I still don't want to go to the dance," he told her, firmly.

It's not about going to the dance. Lullaby thought. Then figured she should probably share that. "It's not about that. The dance thing, it's not. It's about..." she stopped, to give herself a second. More of those floods of emotions that were all over the place happened again. She reached up to drag one of her hands through her hair, and she shut her eyes for a moment, blocking it all out so she could start over. Thoughts ran through her head that were unhelpful, and she tried to shove them back hard, so they could quit distracting her. Eventually she opened her eyes again and found his. "I don't want to be this thing in your life that means you don't do things because of me. For any reason, direct or not. I don't want you to feel bad about anything to do with me." She gave herself points for her voice coming out steady, even if it was quiet.

"You're not a 'thing' in my life, Thia - you're my best friend. And it's... you can't think that being in my life isn't going to affect my choices about things. That you're not going to have an impact on my life. Even if this hadn't happened to you. You'd still be influencing my decisions. What I did and didn't do, the choices I made. Everyone has an impact on everyone else's life, especially when they... They care about each other," Dean told her, speaking fast, slightly annoyed at her right now, though he didn't raise his voice in the least - he so very rarely did.

"I know that, I just..." she drew in a deep breath and forced herself to let it out slowly, before she attempted to refocus. And really, that fucking insane emotional mix going on could stop any time now. Really it could. "I worry." she said finally. Guess they were coming full circle around to both having issues that stemmed from worry. At it's core, that was really it. She worried about him. And she didn't want this happening to him.

"Don't," Dean told her, his annoyance dissipating - he could never maintain it that long with her anyway. "Would it make you feel better if I told you that you're never going to stop me doing anything I wanted to do? Like the party on Friday. Sure, I asked if you'd mind, but - I already knew what you'd say, so that was an easy one," he admitted. "And if I'd actually wanted to go to the dance without you then I'd have told you I was going like I told you I was going to the party. If I want to go, I'll go." I'd just miss you while I was there and think about how much better it'd be if you were with me and in no world could I ever tell you that.

"Yes, that would make me feel better." she confirmed. "Okay." She didn't know if she felt fully settled, there were lingering doubts and worries there, but it was better than before. And probably as good as she was going to get. She was silent for a few long moments, then gave him an attempt at a light half smile. It worked out alright for her. "If you miss me too much when you're out without me, I'm just a text message away." she added. That was the better emotion to focus on. That it felt good on some levels to know that he missed her when she wasn't around. That even if he had a life and school and places to go and people to talk to that he still would like her to be around.

Dean smirked slightly. "Do I not text you enough already?" he teased, going with that to try and lighten things up again. "I wouldn't like to be thought of as a phone-hog."

"Nope." she said, her smile brighter this time. "Definitely not enough. You could probably text me at least three more times a day before I'd consider you a phone-hog." she added. "I'm a geek and like getting text messages." she said. Then paused, wondering if she could ask him something about what happened early that morning...but she wasn't sure what to do there. "You want to share a little mini pizza with me? Since neither of us eat much and the waitress has been hovering over there since it was clear we were in the middle of a discussion?"

Dean shrugged. "Sure - I guess we should buy something in exchange for the nicely warming heat, right?" he suggested. "But - your choice. I'm not fussed about what we have," he added, looking over in the direction of the waitress, who immediately headed in their direction.

Lullaby ordered for them, getting her favorite and figuring Dean really wouldn't care, and she got herself a cherry sprite, too. She liked bar-made cherry sprites, they had cherries in them and everything. Then, off went the waitress, and she turned her attention back to Dean. Her question was still on the tip of her brain, but she didn't know yet if she could bring it up so she brought up something else, first. "Is Thom Harkin still dating Leija?" she asked. "The girl I met, Alexis, she said she kind of liked Thom."

Dean shook his head. "No - Leija and Thom split up a while back. She - she dumped him because she liked Caleb," he added, hesitantly, not really knowing how well Thia knew Thom, considering Dean was Caleb's friend. Really, he preferred it stay out of relationship politics. But then again, Caleb was out of town and he hadn't seen Leija around much either. "Alexis - is that the girl you met?" he asked. God, he was bad with names.

Lullaby nodded. "Yeah, that's her. I gave her a little advice, I just was curious if he was still dating Leija or not. But if he isn't, then maybe she's got a shot." She didn't usually get involved in relationship drama between people either. About the closest she came was her intensely strong opinion on Jezebelle and Journey. ...and she supposed she had for Dean and Janice too, but she couldn't actively do anything there and therefore hadn't. Either way, it required it to happen to someone really close to her.

"Maybe," Dean agreed, though he knew it didn't just take someone being single to give you a shot. It required them having the slightest inkling that you were an option in that respect. And to be at all interested. God, did he know that one.

"Guess we'll find out, if she actually tries." Lullaby said. It was kind of a statement that she made that didn't have any heart to it, however. She wasn't actually paying that much attention to that. It wasn't what was on her mind. "...so, can I ask you for some perspective on something?" she asked. Apparently, she was going to bring it up. She just didn't know who else to ask, and anyways, he was her best friend, right? And she knew that he was kinda maybe friends now with Joshua too...did that mean that it was less okay for her to ask? Was there a rating system? Did it work on a sliding scale or something? She knew there were rules, she just...wasn't exactly sure what those rules were. Particularly because there were mixed genders going on. Like, was Joshua going to be more important and the loyalty would go there because of guy-rules? Or was she because she was the best friend? She was overthinking this. Way, way overthinking this. She just hated the idea of putting Dean in a bad spot, considering she really hated her own spot in things in the first place. Shit. Grr. But...this was why she needed the perspective in the first place.

"Course you can," Dean told her, looking a little thrown that she even felt the need to ask permission on that. "What's up?" he added, putting the napkin down and giving her his full and undivided attention, resting his elbows on the table as he turned to her a little more.

As he turned his full attention on her, she started to fidget, which meant she was twisting the ring he'd given her around and around on her finger. "I got a text this morning. Like...early-early." she explained. "It was from Joshua. And...I don't know, he was drinking, and I think maybe alone, and that's really got me worried, because when people start drinking alone that's never a good sign. But...I don't know, anyways, so we're texting and everything's fine then he hits me up with that whole 'can I ask you a question, promise you won't get mad' sort of thing, and that's never a good sign either." She sighed, trying to make herself stop fidgeting. "Then he...kinda said a bunch of things and asked me that whole 'do you think you'd ever want to get back with me ever ever ever' thing."

Dean froze and had to remind himself to start breathing again and force himself to relax. He had his own views already on this, after all. It would just be different to hear it directly from her. "What did you say?" he asked, after a moment or two.

"I had no idea what to say." Lullaby said, looking fairly miserable. "I texted him back to say that we probably shouldn't talk about it when he's been drinking, and I wanted to stay friends. Which I hope that he kind of gets what I meant there, but I still feel like I messed up or did something really wrong, and I was really kind of happy the last time we'd hung out because it felt normal and okay and not weird and now I wonder if he was just kinda holding onto some idea that we'd get back together, and now that he knows we aren't if he's just gonna..." she made a vague gesture. "...go away. He said he wanted to see me tomorrow, but still...he could change his mind." She bit at her lower lip a moment, and eyed him. "Did I do the wrong thing? I didn't want to lie, or...I dunno."

You're not ever going to get back together? Dean thought and only just stopped himself from saying, he was that surprised. He'd been convinced... But, really - had he been? He'd believed it, he'd been sure. But he'd had no reason to think that, had he? He knew he hadn't - that had been the reason he'd said nothing to Joshua that night. Because he'd known it was all in his head, just another reason why he would never have her. Because she belonged to someone else, even if they weren't together right now. "If there's - if there's no chance of you guys ever getting back together, then it'd be wrong to string him along," Dean told her, eventually. "And - I take it there's no chance?" he asked, this fairly tentatively.

"That's what I was thinking, I don't want to be that girl who does something that awful, that'd be really unfair, and I just..." She sighed. "I didn't see this coming. And maybe that just makes me stupid, I don't know. But..." she looked at him and shook her head. "No. I...I care about him. A lot. I think about him, and I miss seeing as much of him as I used to. But I don't miss him like that. I'm not...even when I'm around him, things have just changed for me. I don't think about like...kissing him or anything, my mind isn't on those tracks. I'm not like...pining or anything, I just...we broke up, and I did that for a reason, or a lot of them, and I just..." she paused, as their drinks came, and she took a second to fish the cherries out of her soda so she could eat them. "I don't feel like that about him anymore. I just want to be his friend." She bit at her lower lip. "That's probably asking too much, isn't it. Like...most people when they break up have the sense to know that their ex probably isn't going to want to be around at all, huh. Should I...I don't know, not try to keep up a friendship if he drops his end cuz of this? Like if he doesn't actually come see me tomorrow and stuff?"

Dean thought for a moment before speaking. "I talked to him about you - the other night, when we were drinking," he admitted, mentally going through what had been said that night and fencing off those parts that he wasn't wiling to share with her. "He was saying kinda the same thing about you - except without the whole not getting back together thing. I mean, about the friendship thing - he wasn't sure whether you wanted him there or not."

Frowning, she took a second to let that sink in. "...why would I say I wanted to, hang out with him and stuff, and not?" she asked. "It wasn't like we broke up on bad terms. I didn't break up with him because he was an asshole or I hated him or anything. It just...does he think--" she broke off, kind of thrown now. Or, well, moreso than she already was.

"From a guy point of view? 'Let's just be friends' is kinda seen as a way of letting someone down gently. I know you didn't mean it like that, but I - I wasn't... it'd be different, y'know? If I was him, in that position," Dean told her.

"Well, it kind of was letting him down gently, but not in the...'hey go away I don't want you in my life anymore' way, in the 'hey I'd like to step back to that place where we were friends before' way." Lullaby said. "Does that not happen? Like...does that not work in reality and I'm just being really fantastically naive here?"

"I dunno," Dean admitted. "I... Don't have a huge amount of experience there. Sometimes? Maybe? But - you have to both want to be friends, y'know? If he wants more than that, if he can't just be friends then..." Dean trailed off, starting to hold a mirror up to his own situation, but he batted that thought away. He was okay with just friends. He was. This was fine. "I think you just have to work through it." He wondered whether to bring up the situation of the other girl. Whatever the hell her name was - he couldn't remember. Had Joshua said anything about her? Probably not. not if he'd been asking about getting back together again.

"Would it be worse if I did? Like...is it just going to be really hard on him if I want to be around him and stuff but don't want...more?" she asked. "Like is that just going to make him all miserable? I don't...I've never been in this kind of situation before, I don't really know what to do or what would be best." she said. And it didn't help that she didn't have a normal life, either, and she had to wonder if her wanting to keep Joshua as a friend was selfish of her if she didn't want more, because she didn't have many people in the first place...shit.

"If Joshua can't handle just being friends with you, Thi, then it's up to him to tell you that. It's not up to you to second guess him and try and decide what's best for him," he told her, firmly. "If he can't handle it, then he can't handle it, but - he's got to decide that. And at least you'll know that if he stays around, he's doing it because he wants to be your friend and not because he thinks you're going to get back together again. He'll be around for the right reasons."

She nodded, glancing down and righting the ring on her finger, more for something to distract herself than because it was crooked. "I think what's kind of throwing me is I didn't see it coming. Like...I didn't know that was an issue to begin with. I think I'm just...I don't know. Blind, probably." She sighed, and tugged her fingers through her hair. and probably fantastically stupid. Which keeps coming up more and more often.

"You just always think the best of people," Dean told her. "That's not a bad thing - but it means you get surprised when people don't act the way you think they should. Joshua - he loves you. Course he's gonna want you back. And - you broke up because of what happened. Because you couldn't be there like he needed you to be, because you couldn't handle it. So - he had that little hope, y'know? Maybe now that's not there anymore he can actually get on with being friends. That won't be in the way. When you know there's no chance at all - it's easier to concentrate on just being friends," he told her. Now that was something he knew for a fact.

I dunno, it hasn't helped me lately. Went through her mind, but she shoved that way, way far down. Where it belonged. "Okay." she said. "I don't want to do that, the make decisions for someone thing. I just...worry, I guess. I don't want to make anything harder on him. And I had thought all this was done and now I know it's not, and--yeah. I just don't want to do that. I don't want to be that girl, who's around, and making everything worse, or whatever. He's a good guy, he doesn't deserve that."

"He's also a big boy who can take care of himself," Dean told her, then paused. "Should be able to take care of himself. And if he can't, he'll have to learn. And I'm sure that if you're making things worse, he'll just... You want me to talk to him?" he offered, cringing a little at that thought. How would he even approach that? When Joshua was so sure that he was the next in line?

Lullaby shook her head. "No." she said. "That would probably just be fantastically uncomfortable for like...everyone." she assessed. "Just...when you see him, see if he's okay in a roundabout way? Even if it's just kinda..assessment, you don't have to ask. I'm sure he'd kinda...not be happy I told you." she said. Then she made a face. "I'm sorry if I shouldn't have, I didn't know if there were guy rules I was going against or if I still could cuz you're my best friend, and...yeah shutting up now."

Dean shook his head. "No - guy rules are more... if I was a friend of Joshua's then I could never go for you type thing. Not that... I mean... That is, I..." Shut the fuck up Conway, damage done, don't make it worse, he told himself. He really shouldn't have even said that.

It caught her attention and she glanced up, sort of waiting for him to finish that sentence, but then he just...didn't. What exactly did you expect him to say? Idiot. she told herself. She wondered if she told him she had to go to the bathroom if he'd by it, considering they hadn't eaten yet, and she generally didn't eat...like ever. Probably not. She needed to quit looking at his eyes and wanting to reach out and brush the hair back from them. Her hands disappeared under the table again, just to stop herself. "Okay. I was just um. Wondering. I didn't want to put anyone in a bad position." La la la nothing to see here, moving on, moving on...

"Right, but - you wouldn't. I mean, no guy rules - I just - that was a bad example. But, you know... Okay, like - Leija. I mean, Caleb's interested, so... Even if I was, which I'm not, but if I was, then she'd be out of bounds. Cos you don't do that to a mate. That's all I mean," he babbled, unable to stop himself. "That's all..." he concluded, looking across at her. Except it wasn't all, was it? Not to him - there was the thing, because Joshua wasn't his friend. Not like that. Sure, there'd been the other night but... And, were they going to become friends? And would that change anything? And if it did, would it change things between him and Thia? And was he okay with that? Maybe he should just be okay with that, because what it'd change would be to firmly hit home that that which he knew was impossible was even more impossible, since he seemed to be having a bit of a hard time with that lately. It was just all too confusing.

She watched him as he rambled, with all the sort of half tripping over things, and all. It was a little easier to take, when he shifted the example away from her, but what he was talking about kind of left questions in her mind. Like...okay Dean was hanging out with Joshua now and such, was their friendship going to outrank she and Dean's? Guy rules were confusing. And she didn't really know what they all were, so that didn't help her out any. And she didn't know if she could ask, without arousing suspicion, and anyways she shouldn't be thinking about it in the first place. Because her stupid Thing with Dean was just...going to go away. Any day now. So it wasn't anything she needed to think about at all in any fashion, because it didn't matter. And she should really probably say something. "Okay. Thanks for explaining it to me."

Dean reached for another napkin and started twisting it round in his hands, trying to think of something to say to distract from this huge moment of discomfort, which she'd obviously caught on to - hell, she would have had to be blind to miss it. "I'm sure Joshua'll be fine," he offered, after a moment. "Just - I guess... Be his friend and if he doesn't tell you to fuck off, you're doing something right?" Which had been the advice he'd given to Joshua the other night. But maybe people shouldn't list to his advice - look at him, he was making a right mess of things really, wasn't he? "Or, y'know, don't listen to me - I dunno."

"I don't think you've steered me wrong yet." Lullaby said, giving him a light half smile. "So...okay. I'll just keep doing what I've been doing and hope he doesn't fuck off and never speak to me again." she said, sighing and slumping in her chair a little. He'd said he wanted to talk, he'd said he was sorry, but she still has that lingering doubt. Hopefully everything would be okay, and she wouldn't fuck things up really bad. Please let me not fuck this up... Maybe their food would get here soon and she could focus on that and shut her brain off. Because it was running in circles.

"I don't think I've really steered you at all," Dean shrugged as the napkin ripped in two and he let one piece drop to the table as he began to shred the other.

She watched him shredding the napkin, and wondered to herself if he was agitated, or if he just did that, and because they'd never actually properly been out to eat before together, that she just hadn't seen the behavior. There were lines around him, but they were kind of...not really heavy, and just weird little wispies. Nothing really readable for her. "Yes you have." she said. "...remember when you were saying that bit about how I'm a part of your life and I influence it? Well...you influence mine." she told him.

His eyes ticked to meet hers as she started talking again and he pushed the napkin to one side - now a pile of little bits. "That's different," he offered, as the waitress arrived with their food. Really, he was glad of the distraction for a moment or two, not that one small pizza was that much of a distraction, but Dean could pick with the best of them.

Lullaby thanked the waitress with a little smile, and looked genuinely happy to get the little baby pizza so they could share. She was looking forward to it, and she took one of the four little slices, pushing it over towards him. "Eat some, please." she said. "And how is that different? Is indirect influence not as important as directly sought advice?" she asked. "I think it's the same. I mean, you've had heavy influence on me, how I see the world, and my place in it." Her mind careened off into other directions and she mentally kicked herself, wishing she would quit that already.

Dean picked up the slice and considered it, before putting it back down again, at a slightly different angle, her statement attracting his attention more than her question. "I have?" he asked her, for a moment genuinely puzzled by that, though if he'd actually sat down and thought about it, maybe he wouldn't have been.

She stared at him. "...of course you have." she said, as if she were a touch confused that he needed that confirmed. "When you found me, I..." she paused and glanced around, but they were actually fairly off by themselves, and she was quiet in the first place. Still, she lowered her voice a touch. "I barely even believed I was real. Or more, I thought I was a ghost. And it took me a really long time to try and think of myself as anything but a monster, too. There's been a lot of things that you've helped me with, just by being around and being a good influence. Not playing into my head tripping on things. And with the place in the world thing, I didn't figure I had one. And I'm still getting over that, but you help with that all the time. Like...hell right this very moment. We're out someplace. Together. In public, where other people can see me, and...it's kind of scary but the longer we've sat here the more I feel relaxed about it, and I can't even tell you how good just that feels. Like maybe one day this isn't going to be so hard." She nibbled at her pizza for a moment, then added one last bit. "And you influence the way I consider myself. I've made you a few promises I intend to keep in regards to risk taking and everything to do with that. And I wouldn't do that if it wasn't for you. So...that's positive too."

He watched her intently as she talked, but when she came to the end of that he simply didn't know what to say in reply. He thought about it for a moment or two, but then he ended up just ducking his head a little and picking the piece of pizza back up, this time actually taking a bite. he liked it, though - what she'd said, though he had to admit the pizza was okay - he just had no idea how to react to that kind of thing.

She hadn't figured that she'd get much of a response. He generally blew off things like that, or ignored them wholesale, and that was apparently what he was going to do now. It gave her a pang, and she glanced down. You are never ever going to acknowledge just how important you are to me, are you. went through her head. So she didn't say anything either, not sure how to say anything, or where to go from there, and instead she just shut up and ate her pizza, eyes mostly down on the candle again.

He took his time with the pizza, actually enjoying the novelty of being able to eat without having to force himself to swallow the food. He wondered if he'd ever reach a point where he felt comfortable admitting to her how much hearing her say things like that meant to him, what a difference it made. He could try, he knew, but he'd just end up falling over himself and she always got that confused and sometimes slightly upset look on her face when he did that. So - he was eating pizza.

She finished her piece, and sat back, taking up her pop, and she drew her feet up onto the seat with her, knees drawn up to her chest as she slouched. Her eyes were mostly down on the candle, but sitting back farther, she could pay more attention to him, and sort of without looking like she was staring. Or at least, she hoped that it came off that way. She didn't want to get caught staring. Especially not right now. When she was feeling all kinds of vulnerable, and she couldn't even say why.

Dean finished off the piece of pizza and paused for a second, before reaching for another. he didn't eat it straight away, but he put it down in front of him as he looked across at her. "Thank you," he said, after another pause.

She noticed he was having another piece, and was proud of him for that. Which was probably a weird thing, but it was there. She didn't quite expect the gratitude, though. And she didn't know what it was for, either. For what she said? For choosing decent pizza? For shutting up for ten minutes? The possibilities were probably endless. Her eyes did lock to his the moment he looked up, however, and she wondered if he would notice. She hoped not. It might be indicative of her paying too much attention. "For what?" she asked, possibly just a heartbeat or two too late, but she had to ask herself if she was really asking, first.

He didn't notice the too much attention thing, after all, they paid attention to each other. That was simply something that they did. "This," he said, after a moment, indicating the pizza - though, really, he'd meant more than that, which was why he hadn't launched into explanation mode straight off. "I - I don't know if I've ever reached for a second slice of pizza while it's still hot," he explained.

That made her smile. It was something that happened just a moment after he stopped speaking, and it was soft and genuine. "You're welcome." she said simply. "I'm glad I can do that, that it helps." she added, feeling good about that. Really good about it, even. It made her feel better, helped make up for the silence and the kind of shut down he usually did over things. She was glad that it was all working in that capacity, it was a positive she could hold onto. It never took that much to make her a happy girl, and that clearly did. It might have been a much more subdued happy than her bouncy excited happy...but it was genuine.

"It does," he told her, knowing that didn't really touch on how he felt about it, but it was all he could manage as he bit into the pizza so he didn't go off into a ramble that said more. That would end up being a bad idea, he was sure.

She continued to smile at him, and figured she should look away here. She was kind of becoming more aware that they were in a restaurant together. Like...out together, and there was candle light and stuff. It was almost like a date. Even if it wasn't. Because dates were not things friends went on, and he didn't in any way think of her like that, and nothing had been asked or set up and never would be and she wasn't thinking about him like that anyways, right? She just had a weird thing. And it would go away eventually. ...which still didn't change the fact that they were in a very date-like circumstance, and she wasn't sure how that had even happened.

"Are you not having any more pizza?" he asked, eventually, as he neared the end of his second slice. okay, so she didn't really eat, but then again - neither did he. And this is why you ordered the smallest pizza there was. Or she had. Or whatever - it was just pizza.

She shook her head. "I had my fix." she said. She was also out of soda, and set the empty glass on the table, but sat back again, and started twisting the ring around her finger once more. It was that or do something stupid, and she wasn't going to. She reminded herself again that the timer had gone off outside. So...she wasn't allowed any physical contact or anything of the kind. "You should eat it. It's good for you and everything." or not. Probably not. But that was her excuse and she was sticking to it.

His eyes flicked to her glass and he picked his still full one up, offering it over. "Okay," he agreed, finishing off his pizza and reaching for the third slice, still not feeling sick. "But, you can have my drink if you want," he offered. He wasn't going to drink it, after all. Food and soda? that was probably pushing it a little too much.

She smirked just the faintest bit. "Aren't you going to have it?" she asked. "It's generally considered the thing to do when one's eating." she pointed out. She did shift her position though, sitting forward again, feet back on the floor, and she reached for it to take a drink, anyways. She wondered if the fact that they'd apparently now shared about everything on the table qualified in that category she wasn't thinking about.

"I'll stick with water," he told her. "I'm... I don't want to push it. Even if it is the thing to do," he added, taking another bite of pizza.

She took it and set it in front of her. "Well I suppose I can take it, if you're insisting. And you didn't drink from it at all, so I suppose that I also won't be picking up any cooties from you." she teased. She gave him a cute little impish sort of smile.

Dean gave her a Look at that, though it was a pseudo-stern one. "You saying I have cooties?" he teased. "I'm offended. And hurt. And will..." he bit back the original ending there of never come near you again, on the basis that it wasn't like he ever got that close anyway and he really shouldn't go around suggesting that was a possibility, when it wasn't. "...glare at you. Lots," he ended instead.

She giggled a little more. "You know theoretically, if you did have cooties, I probably would have been infected with them ages ago, and therefore it's a moot point anyways." she told him, poking him on the knee with her foot beneath the table. "But I won't get any fresh cooties or anything. And that's really only if you have them. But see, you are a boy, and I'm a girl, and I think that that's just the way it goes. I learned that in kindergarten. And you know, everything you need to know in life you learn in kindergarten."

Dean reached across and grabbed her ankle under the table as she poked him. "I'll take your word for it - cooties is another American thing, really," he advised her. "Back home we just knew that girls smell and were urrrrgh. It was a thing."

Lullaby grinned at him cutely, and poked him with her other foot just to see what he'd do. "Girls smell?" she asked. "Really? This from the lot of students who refuse bath time. I'm entirely unsure about that assessment, really, and I protest. I was never a smelly little girl. We kind of have this thing where we make a point to smell pretty and everything. You're just going to have to re-think this entire world view of yours."

Well, that was just a challenge, wasn't it, and he reached under the table to capture her other ankle as well, turning toward her slightly as he did so. "No - girls smelled of girl. And when you're a boy, that was yucky. See? It was all the flowery, nice shit that did it in the first place," he explained, as though explaining to a very small child, though there was humour in his eyes as he did so.

Lullaby made an attempt to cross her feet at the ankles to rest them on his leg, since he had hold of both of them and everything. "I see. So you, and by you I mean males everywhere so be aware you're speaking for your entire species, would be happier if we started to smell more like boys? And stopped smelling all flowery or sweet or pretty and everything? Like...we should really start going for something less girly?" She was trying to keep a straight face, but it wasn't working out for her by any stretch of the imagination.

"At five? Yes," Dean told her, allowing her to move her ankles, though he didn't actually let them go. "Yeah, at five, boys would be much happier if girls would just get down and dirty and not be all about the pretty."

She kept grinning at him. "See now, I was one of those girls who did." she told him. "Didn't you have any tomboys in your class? You know, the girls who wanted to play swords with sticks and go running around and who didn't mind getting themselves all scraped up and such? Or playing in the mud, because playing in the mud was awesome. Or playing outside with forts." she continued. "I still maintain that I'm building a snow fort when it flies, you know. And it's going to be awesome." And intensely childish but she was alright with that.

Dean let go of her ankles and rested on his elbows on the tabletop as he realised he had the urge to run a hand up under the bottom of her jeans and stroke her skin, maybe play the bells of her anklet against it. Or something. It was a something best avoided. So, hand removal - safest option. "Yeah, I, er - maybe we did," Dean admitted to her, losing track for a moment as he recognised and avoided the urge, and recognising with it that he'd been flirting again. "And - snow fort would be good." He agreed. "I talked to Isaac today."

"Oh? How is he?" Lullaby asked, watching him kind of trip over words, and she was giving him an amused sort of smile. But there was a subject jump. So she went with it. She just...didn't happen to take her feet back. "I was listening to the cd he left for me earlier." Actually she listened to that quite a lot. She didn't have a lot of music, and now that she had the laptop, she could listen to it on that. With a house where she had little to do but practice her innate gifts, try to keep Maddie from breaking anything or burning the house down, and schoolwork, she really appreciated that bit. But she was curious what Dean and he had talked about, considering it must be something.

"He's okay, seems good. His band's playing at the party tomorrow night," he told her. "Did I mention that his sister's going out with the nob that I hit that time? The one you met in the inbetween? Anyway, it means he wanted to know about fades, so I figured that - since he was a friend of yours and everything and you said he was a good guy that I'd talk to him about them and everything and maybe see how he took it..." he said, keeping an eye on her for her reaction. They'd discussed Isaac before, of course, but nothing had really been specifically said.

"Chance. And no, I missed that part." she said, blinking a touch. "That's...probably a volatile situation." she added, thinking about it. She knew what kind of school life Kaysen had, and knew Isaac was really protective, and she knew Chance's rep, and...oh yeah. That was probably a bit on the screwed side. When he got to the last bit, she stilled a little bit. Setting the glass down on the table, she looked at him, biting at her lower lip a touch. "...and?" she asked, voice a tiny bit quieter than usual.

"He was really cool about it - took it mostly all in his stride. I think knowing Chance helped, really. Because he knew the guy before he knew he was a fade, y'know? Mostly he just wanted to know what he didn't know. I could answer most things, tell him about other things - and I said I'd lend him our book," Dean told her. "He didn't freak or anything at any of it. Really, he took it all a lot better than I thought he would. He had a lot less questions, really. So - I was thinking that maybe we could think about, maybe, if you wanted - I could see about... telling him? I mean, he leaves you music - he obviously still thinks about you. And he seems like an alright bloke. And he was your friend, right? I mean - not pushing or anything and we're tlaking long term here, not like 'right now' or anything, but maybe it's something to think about. If you wanted. Maybe?" Dean asked, trying to get as much of that out before she stopped him.

Lullaby listened as he kind of got himself on a bit of a ramble there, and she couldn't help but smile at him. A soft little amused expression, and she waited til he seemed done to say anything. "Yes, he was my friend, and...maybe? I mean, I'd love to see him again. Just kinda...talk to him. See how he's really dealing, because before, he hadn't dealt so well with all the weird and everything so..." she trailed off thoughtfully. "Maybe after this weekend. He's probably going to be really busy with the party and then the dance and everything. I don't wanna kinda...crash that or whatever. I'm sure even if he took it well, there'll be a whole lot of 'what the fuck' going on. But...yeah. Maybe soonish..." And hey look, now she was nervous even though she herself said not within the next few days. awesome.

Dean smiled, though there was a slight touch of disbelief there. "Really?" he asked - he'd been anticipating another 'hmm, not really' from her. To get not only a possible 'yes', but a yes that had something of a timescale added onto it. He suddenly felt unbelievably nervous about everything. "Okay - whatever you want. Seriously, Thi. Whatever you want," he agreed, quickly.

She ticked her eyes to his and didn't say anything for a moment. She wasn't sure what to say. And of course her instinct when he first said 'really' was in fact, to take it back, but he'd said he thought it might be a good idea. And that had been part of the deal, right? That he was going to talk to Isaac, see what he thought on the situation, and now he had. And he'd said that he thought maybe it should happen, so...she was going to maybe go with that. "We'll talk about it on Monday, kay?" she said. "That's after everything else, and...and I dunno. Yeah." She made a little face at him. "Now I'm nervous."

"Yeah, me too," Dean admitted, honestly admitting to that, because he was. His heart was hammering, or so it felt and when he realised that, he reached for the charm on his wrist without thinking, holding it between his thumb and forefinger. Her heart was beating faster as well.

His eyes ticked up to meet hers, but he didn't say anything about it, though he looked a little abashed as he let the charm go, straightening it against the cord, as though to pretend that that was all he'd been doing in the first place, though they both knew the truth there. "We can talk about it on Monday," he promised.

She watched him check the charm, and it actually made her smile a little. Kind of an unreadable one, but it was there. She didn't actually know that she'd seen him do that. She knew he checked at least sometimes, he'd called her on nerves before...even if when he'd done that her heart had been thudding hard for entirely different reasons. ...which she shouldn't be thinking about right now so she needed to quit that. She didn't need the mental imagery. "Yeah. Then...I dunno. Um. Do me a favor?" she asked. "If I start getting intensely twitchy and everything, remind me that Isaac's my friend, and you think that it's a good idea to tell him? I'll probably need to hear it about sixty times at a minimum."

"Done," Dean agreed, easily. "And - if you want me to be there. Or in the next room. Or hiding round the corner. Or if you don't want me anywhere near... Whatever you want, however you want to play it - I'll... Just let me know, okay?" he told her, resisting reaching back for her feet again, feeling the need to touch her right now - and in their current position feet felt more natural than hands, weirdly. But hands seemed more acceptable, so he did neither.

"I will. I'll think about it. I don't even know what I'd wanna do there, if I should...go say hi? Or set something up? No clue. I'm lost on that score. How does one even figure out how to best assess that situation? It's not like there's a good way to do it. I'm sure no matter what happens he'll at least be a little freaked out and maybe I should just...leave it go. For a while. Or something." she said, now starting to make a worried sort of face, and she bit at her lower lip.

"Well, I was kinda thinking that I'd tell him for you, and then set up a meeting, or something," Dean admitted. At least, that was how it had gone in his head that he hadn't discussed with her at all. Dean being Dean, he had running plans for this kind of thing. He didn't have the specifics down, but he had broad outline plans for telling people, just in case she ever agreed to it.

She still looked a little nervous, and looked at him. "...do you know what you would say?" she asked. Maybe that would work best. So...if there was massive freaking out, she wouldn't have to see it up close and personal where she'd take that sort of thing to her ridiculously far off grave? She wasn't at all sure that she could manage it. That...would hurt. A lot. And probably want to make her hide for the rest of her natural life, not that she wasn't doing that right now. Shit.

"I'd think of something," Dean said - which he thought sounded a little better and more positive than 'no'. He suddenly wished they weren't sitting in a pizza palour - he wanted to be alone with her. He wanted to be able to gather her into him and move her onto his lap where they could talk properly and... Maybe it was a good idea they were here. They didn't need all of that for a conversation. They were communicating just fine here. Just because he'd feel better with it - but that didn't mean it was needed.

She smiled at that. "I'm sure you would." she said, sounding like she had honest faith in that. And really, she did. It was Dean, Dean did that kind of stuff. He planned stuff out all the time. Maybe he'd figure out a good way to say it that wasn't 'so I've been hiding Thia for about a month or so now, she's not quite dead, or she got better'. That wouldn't go over well, she was thinking. Really not. So...yeah. Whatever, she was overthinking, and she'd have a whole weekend to spin her wheels on this. ...which might not be a good thing. Oh well. she was still planning on going to the game kinda, when Dean was gone to the party. Maybe that would help clear her head. It was a theory.

"We'll talk about it Monday," he promised her again. Give her time to get used to the idea. Give him time to think of something - which he would. God, he so would. For her, anything, after all. "So - you wanna get out of here?" he asked her.

She nodded. Yes, she did. In fact, she kind of wanted to for a bit now. Like...yeah. She'd been sort of having twitches of her own that she was ignoring but they had in fact, involved not being in there anymore. "You still feeling good?" she asked, finally putting her feet back down on the floor, and she stood, reaching for the hoodie to tug over her head.

"I'm feeling fine," Dean assured her, pulling out his wallet and looking for the waitress, assuming that they needed to get the bill here and they didn't just go up somewhere else to get it. He hadn't actually gone out to eat without his parents all that much before, so wasn't entirely sure how this worked.

"We go up there." Lullaby said, nodding towards the register, and she grabbed his coat, grinning at him as she held it up like she was going to help him with it. Which, she would, she just figured she'd be getting a Look from him for it. Of course she was reminded of the whole he literally put his hoodie back on her the other night, after they'd been in the water, and...Remember how you were gonna not think about this shit? Yeah, go back to that.

"Right - yeah, I... Don't do this much," he admitted, standing and taking his coat from her as he looked a little embarrassed. God, this felt weird suddenly, like something he wasn't at all thinking about. "I'll just - go pay then," he told her, hurriedly, before heading off to the till without another glance at her.

She felt that little rush of Weird too, and sort of fidgeted at the table for a second, before she wandered after him, purposely taking her time so she didn't walk up behind him as he paid for their shared dinner. ...alright the 'd' word was definitely drifting in the forefront of her brain, but that totally wasn't at all what this was. No sir. She headed outside, even, into the little mini entryway before the proper outside, and she gazed out the glass door, wondering what they were doing next. Or if it was just 'going home' in which case, did that mean he was going to drop her off then go home himself? After like an hour in the car where they couldn't quite talk properly without him driving them off the side of the road into a tree? She didn't like the sound of that.

Dean joined her in the foyer after he'd paid, tucking his wallet into his back pocket again, before shrugging on his jacket. At some point whilst they'd been eating, it'd gotten dark out and he wanted to step closer to her, put his arm around her again like he had done before, to protect her even though he couldn't really and they both knew that. In any case, he didn't - because of the weirdness back there he'd really prefer to avoid. And forget and... He thrust his hands firmly into the pockets of his jacket. "So..." he said, in a 'what now' kind of a way.

She looked back at him and gave him a little half smile. "So!" she repeated. "Where to now? We could do that movie thing. Or we could go somewhere else, or...something." she said. Then she made a cute face. "That was just extremely unhelpful of me, wasn't it?" she asked. "Sorry. Okay. Um. Is there anything you wanted to do?"

Ignoring the loaded question that's only loaded in your own sick mind, Dean told himself firmly. "Erm - not sure I'm up for a movie. And, erm - it's late. I mean, I have school tomorrow and everything, so..." He didn't particularly want to go home. He'd enjoyed this evening. And he never liked taking her back to that house. That would never be on his list of 'fun things to do'. But a movie sounded like a very bad idea right now, all things considered. "I dunno," he ended.

She nodded and glanced away, out the door again. Right. He'd mentioned home, and school tomorrow. Which meant it was going to be the hour drive and then she'd be dropped off without a chance to keep talking to him proper-like. Damn. She didn't want to go home. But she also couldn't say 'hey, how about we just go back to your house, and hang out there'. Because he would still have to drive her home, and she had a feeling if she curled up on his bed she was going to fall asleep and anyways, he'd already given the excuse, he didn't want to spend more time with her. He'd done it before, she knew what it meant. Him mentioning school meant he was fucking off now, and that was it. ...she wondered if he was really going to hate the fact that there was still an hours drive with her still around, and he couldn't just turn around and go back to his own room. It made her feel bad, and she reached for the door, pushing out of it. "You do in fact, have school." she said, forcing herself to speak because she knew she had to. She gave herself points for sounding normal.

"So, we should - head back to Marquette, I guess," he suggested, not happy to say he'd take her home. He didn't want to take her home. He didn't even like referring to that house as her home, though he knew he should.

"Yeah. You don't wanna start driving too late...don't want to start going where there're going to be a lot of deer to watch. Which I'll help you watch for." Lullaby said. "They kinda like to play suicide run after dark. So...I'll watch. You drive." she added, talking for the sake of talking, really. She paused as she tried to remember where they'd parked, though, and realized it wasn't outside here, it was through the park. She shoved her hands in her hoodie's front pocket, because she found herself half reaching out for his hand, and that was bad.

He turned to start them walking, then paused and looked at her. "Stupid question: do you remember where we parked?" he asked her, hoping that she did- he wasn't sure where they were in the dark. He'd never been here before and, yeah - his mind hadn't really been on where they were going when they'd been walking earlier.

"Yeah, we walked through the park across the street there." she said, pointing over at it. "So we're on the other side." she explained. Then she flashed a little smile at him. "I was thinking the same thing, and remembered." she admitted, so he knew he hadn't been the only one who had had a moment of pause there. "So...crazy park of parkness, and not doom, then car on the other side." Sweet freedom for you. She walked up to the curb and like a good girl, looked both ways, but it wasn't busy out at current, so she was all good.

He headed across the road with her, wondering absently if it was safe to walk through the park in the dark, or whether they should head round by the road. Then again, if they walked round by the road with its streetlights, there'd be more chance someone would see her being ghostly, wasn't there? Choices, choices. Nowhere was really safe anymore, after all, or so it felt to him - or was he just really getting that paranoid these days? "I think I'm getting paranoid," he said, outloud, echoing his own thoughts. "Cos I'm wondering about the safety of a park in a quiet town after dark."

"We could go around if you want." Lullaby suggested. "I think it's okay. But...well. Neither one of us has anything nice like a weapon or the like. I should start carrying something. The thought just kind of makes me nervous, and I keep remembering what I said before, that whole 'don't pick up a weapon you don't fully intend to use' thing. ...which reminds me, I still haven't quite gotten in lessons with things, have I?" she asked rhetorically. "Um. Maybe I could get a bow and arrow from...there are too many houses right now. Home. ...for real home. I could probably practice that on my own."

For real home? Dean thought and so very nearly almost asked. But no, he would just... let that one slide. He wouldn't press there. "I would be, but - I came straight to yours without going home. I guess I could like leave it in the glove compartment, or something. Maybe that would be a better idea, all things considered," he contemplated. He had another moment of unrealism as he contemplated the changes in his life that had him talking so normally about carrying a gun. He remembered how much he'd hated it when he'd first started. He knew that one of the only reasons he now could deal with it was that he didn't let himself dwell too deeply on it. Moving on. "Yeah, you haven't. Maybe... I could - you could. I mean... I could take you round to mine every evening. Then you could practice with me and stuff. I've kinda skipped a few days as it is, so..." He trailed off a little. He knew how that one ended in his imagination. It ended with her staying. With him just not taking her back. But he wouldn't suggest that.

"Wouldn't that slow you down though?" Lullaby asked as she opted to walk them around the park, since he'd mentioned being twitchy about walking through. "You'd be oh...a million billion miles ahead of me, and then Oz would just have to try and catch me up, and we don't even know if I'm any good at anything, so wouldn't...I mean I wouldn't mind of course, I just don't wanna..." intrude. She'd promised she'd learn whatever he wanted her to, that still didn't mean she had to crash his own stuff. Like his time with Oz and all that kind of thing especially if she was just going to suck.

"You wouldn't be in the way. I mean - it'd be up to Oz, of course, but he's already said he's willing to teach you whatever, so... And I don't mind. I'd-" like you there. "I think it'd be good for you to learn. I think you should." He saw an in, an excuse, and he took it. "I mean, we could, like.... go back to mine and talk to him about it tonight, if you wanted," he suggested with affected casualness.

Oh thank god. rushed through her mind. She wanted to go back to his house, she really did, but there was something in her that absolutely refused to invite herself anywhere. Even if it meant she'd just be dropped back at the house where she didn't want to be. At all. "Yeah, we could do that." she decided, also sounding as nonchalant as possible on that score. "That is if you don't mind like...trips all over." she added.

"Oh no, that's fine," he reassured her, quickly, suppressing a smile as she agreed. "I don't mind at all, really. And then we'd know, you know and... Yeah. I don't mind," he told her.

She smiled back at him, feeling much better herself now. "Okay. Well then, let's do that. Though I still want to go grab bow and arrow stuff soon!" she added. "The day's kinda start getting long, there." she said, making a little bit of a face, and playing off just how much she felt like she needed to keep herself occupied, just to ignore the bad feeling that was constantly grating against her.

Dean quickened his pace back to the car a little, whereas before he'd been aware that he was dawdling. He didn't move too fast to make it hard to talk though, just a little enthusiasm that hadn't been there before. "Well, maybe you'll turn out to be better with a bow and arrow than I am," he admitted, pulling a little face in the darkness. "I feel all fingers and thumbs at times. That whole having to hold two things at once - not great at it," he added.

Lullaby laughed a bit. "Yeah, but okay let's be real here for a second...just how often would you actually need a bow and arrow?" she asked. "You've more than got things covered with your other areas of extreme, ridiculous expertise. And I might suck at it, too. In fact, I kind of predict a lot of sucking going on anyways with me and all things weapon related."

"'Other areas of extreme, ridiculous expertise'?" Dean queried with a laugh. "God, you make it sound like I'm good at loads of things. So, I'm a good shot, that's not plural," he admonished, trying to bring it more within realistic terms. "And, okay - a bow and arrow might have been better against the vamps. If I could have shot them through the heart or something," he pointed out.

Lullaby checked her shoulder into his. "Oh hush up. You're good at planning and strategy too, and remember the whole when zombies attack, you need to be the Q for us and build all sorts of neat gadgets and stuff cuz you're schematic-guy? Plus you're pretty calm most of the time...got solid focus and determination going for you...do you want me to go on here?" she asked playfully grinning at him. "And sure that one specific situation, it might've been okay. But name one other." Technically, she could name one other, she just wanted to see what he'd say.

"Bow and arrow's a hell of a lot quieter than a gun," Dean pointed out. "So any time that you need to be stealthy. And the zombie stuff - that's just us talking. I'm not actually going to be able to do any of that shit - you know that, right?" he checked, hoping that she did, in fact, know that. If not, they were really in trouble.

She laughed. "You know, I know that the practicality of you coming up with some amazing, technologically awesome thing is a pipe dream. But I would have faith in your ability to come up with something. You know, like in the remake of Dawn of the Dead. With the super crazy kill buses. You'd come up with something better than that. Or, we both would. I think together, our strategic abilities are pretty sound." she said. "And points for the stealthy thing, that's what I had in mind. So two instances. Either way...you would have us covered in near enough anything. And I'll see what I can do, or learn, but I'm pretty sure I could practice for ever and ever, and never be as good as you on the firearms front. You're...." she shook her head, trailing off. "Yeah." And you, Lullaby, are seriously riding a line right now, so stop it. Seriously. That whole thing was what sparked your attention in the first damn place, stop talking about it.

"I know, I'm not bad," he agreed, in a 'I've acknowledged this and now we're moving on' almost dismissive kind of tone. Dean never did very well at talking nice thing about himself. "Maybe you'll find something else you're good at or something. Or maybe you'll just get good enough at stuff to be able to defend yourself and not be worried that it's going to be used against you - which was the idea in the first place, right?"

"I don't know, you just wanted me to learn everything you were learning. So...it wasn't actually my idea, it was yours, so what was the idea?" she asked, watching him out of the corner of her eye. She knew he'd kind of touched on it, but...well. It wasn't like that time hadn't been chock full of trauma, now was it? She wondered if he'd changed his mind on any of that or anything. Probably not.

"I'd thought there was a time when you'd wanted to learn as well - before that," Dean told her, though what she'd said was right. He had his own, other, reasons for wanting her to learn. Wanting everyone to learn. So that it wasn't just all down on him. So they could do without him if they had to, so she never had to die like that again. It was just that the very thought of that brought him down. Somehow thinking of her learning to be able to protect herself - that was easier to deal with on a day-to-day basis than to dredge up the other reasons.

"I did. You just never seemed to want to let me. So...I'm glad you let up on that." she said. But she saw it, the change, the drifts of black lines coming off of him as they walked. She reached out, even if she hadn't been going to, to take his arm, since his hands were still in his pockets. It wasn't quite as good as taking one of his hands, but...she was going to see if he'd let her get away with this first. She wasn't entirely positive he would. "So...anyways, I'll learn what I can. I just figure I'll have something around at the other house so I can be less bored and yet being useful at the same time. So it's just practical." Plus, with that, I can get out beyond the perimeter for a valid reason, and maybe it'll give me the excuse to be out of there for at least an hour a day. She didn't say it though, she knew how bad Dean twitched about her staying there in the first place. There wasn't any reason to make that worse.

Dean nodded, but didn't say anything. He was grateful when she took his arm, taking comfort from the physical contact that he could never have brought himself to ask for, wanting more of it. Right now he wanted to hug her, hold her close for a few minutes and use that to banish the thoughts of her lying bleeding, and the reasons for that. Everything behind it - he wanted to shift those thoughts and memories again, stop them from clouding the current day, spoiling everything. This was why he didn't think - this was why he just kept pushing forward. He didn't do well when he looked back, when he stopped.

She noticed that he didn't say anything, of course. Hard to miss, that. Continuing to keep an eye on him, she wracked her brain for something to say, and landed on the thing that came to mind the most readily. "Hey, Dean...thanks for taking me out. I was pretty nervous, walking around and everything, but I just...really appreciate this. Even now since we've been out for a while and everything I'm not so nervous, and so it kinda makes me feel like maybe things will be alright. If I can get past the twitches in a short time, then I should be alright. Or that's my running theory and I'm sticking to it. But...anyways. Yeah. Thank you."

Dean looked across at her and tried a small smile. "No problem," he assured her, though his tone lacked enthusiasm, which disappointed him. He hadn't meant for that to come out like that. He ducked his head slightly for a moment before trying again. "I've had a good time too," he told her.

In that moment, she felt helpless. Like she couldn't quite do this the way she wanted to. She couldn't quite make something better for him or cheer him up. And they were heading around the corner towards the car, so...she didn't even have that much time, either. She was glad they were headed back to his house, but still. In the hour ride home he could change his mind on that. Lullaby opened her mouth to say something, but shut it again because she didn't quite know what to say.

Dean wasn't sure what to say either as they approached the car. He should, he knew. He should make an effort to move past thing funk that had descended and which didn't have any bearing on anything current at all. She'd just worry, like she did. And she'd have that whole ride home to be worrying in, since he couldn't talk to her and drive at the same time.

She slowed down as they got closer to the car. It wasn't necessarily intentional, but she did want to put off getting into it and doing that driving away thing where they couldn't talk. Especially now, what with it going to be dark in there. So there would be even less chance of communication. Eventually she just stopped them, still a good five feet away from it. "Dean are you okay?" she asked.

He stopped when she did, turning to her without a second thought in the darkness. "Yeah - I'm... Sorry, just a ... thing. It'll pass. I'm fine," he told her, brushing it off. He was just dwelling. He needed to not do that, it just brought things down. If he concentrated on the now, that'd be better, make things dealable. Now was good, he was enjoying the now. He could enjoy the immediate future - he just needed to not dwell on the past.

She shifted, and slid her arms around him, to give him a hug, which was the natural thing to do since he turned towards her when they stopped. "Is there anything I can do?" she asked. Other than hugging him, which she felt was ineffectual. She pondered being silly for a moment, but didn't have it in her right at that very second. So she left it as is.

The hug wasn't ineffectual at all. The hug had been exactly what he needed as he hugged her back, dropping his head to her shoulder for a moment and just holding her. Sometimes a hug did more for him than a thousand words ever could and he felt a little better when he stepped back from it. "You already did," he told her, sounding more like himself and giving her a little smile that seemed more genuine this time.

She looked up at him and smiled in return. He seemed sincere, and the lines had retreated somewhat, so she was going to call it good. Hugging him had apparently been the thing to do. Remember back in the day when I had to ask to do that? went through her mind, but she didn't share. "Okay then. So...we ready for possible deer dodging and classic rock for an hour?" she asked. She clasped her hands behind her back, but that was just because she had an inexplicable urge to tug him back closer again, and that was just stupid.

"Always up for new experiences," he agreed with a nod, heading for the car ahead of her so he could wrench open the passenger door for her. yeah, he was going to be seeing what he could do with that this weekend.

Lullaby got in, and curled up on the seat, giving him the thumbs up to slam the door shut again, as she leaned across to unlock his door for him. Now, she was just hoping that he didn't change his mind on taking her back to his house for a little while and she'd be calling things good. ...well that and she hoped they didn't get up close and personal with a deer on the way home. That would suck a lot.

Dean got in his side and started the engine up, turning the heating on a little higher to warm to cold interior up as he turned the radio down a little - if he was going to have to concentrate on driving in the dark with the possibility of things jumping out in front of the car, he wanted as few distractions as possible, though he was aware that Thia probably wouldn't be able to hear it anymore. But there was nothing to be done about that and he just wanted to get them home safely as he pulled away from the side of the road and headed out of town, back to Marquette.

The drive back was mostly uneventful. There were a few deer families hanging out on the sides of the road, and Lullaby pointed out what she thought was a coyote at one point, but the woodland creatures weren't feeling particularly suicidal or vindictive that night, so it was a quiet drive. And, she smiled as they weren't going back to Billy and Maddie's House of Crazy Weird Doom. God did that send a rush of relief through her, and she relaxed back in her seat more, taking a few minutes to watch him in the dim lights of the panel display as he drove. He always looked like he was really concentrating...which to be fair he probably was. He was careful like that.

Dean felt a wave of relief wash over him as they pulled up outside the house he was living in now, that he was loosely referring to as 'home', though that was mostly because every other possible identifier was just far too confusing with the various house-swaps. But, he'd got them back without incident and he turned off the negine and hopped out to open the door for her, since it only opened from the outside.

She helped with the push, and got out, smiling in a happy way and even after the car ride, she bounced a little on the balls of her feet. She liked this place much better. Sure, it wasn't home-home, but it was whole worlds better. Worlds. There was a distinct lack of horrible icky feelings! She was a fan. Plus, she recognized that she missed Oz and Sophie a bit too, and was looking forward to seeing them, even if it was just for a kind of 'hi, bye!' thing. She stopped herself before she reached for Dean's hand, and headed towards the house. She also stopped herself from a happy chorus of 'we're home, we're home, we're home!'

Dean watched her as she moved off, amused and pleased by her reaction, happy that she was obviously happy to be here, glad he'd had a reason to get her back here, even if that reason would only last for a little while. Even if he wasn't sure he could come up with another one to keep her here longer, or even if he should. Sure, he hated that house she was living in, but it was her choice to stay there and he'd be being a manipulative bastard if he started coming up with excuses to not take her back there just because she wouldn't leave.

Lullaby walked up the porch steps, but waited for him, because those same manners that wouldn't let her invite herself anywhere dictated that she couldn't just walk in, either. Regardless of history, or if she'd been living with them for weeks, or anything like that. But she did look happy and bouncy. "After we talk to Oz for a few, are you gonna show me your room?" she asked. "Did you keep the one that was mine, even?"

"There's only two rooms, Thia," Dean pointed out, though he was still tempted to see if he could move down to the basement to get a little more privacy. "Yeah, I'm in the same room you were." Which had been doing interesting things to his state of mind, last thing at night. Sleeping as he was in her bed. "But yeah, I can show you," he agreed, happy to do anything that wasn't getting back in the car and taking her back to that house.

"Yeah, well, I know it was Oz and Sophie's room before mine and maybe they would want it back and--shut up." she said playfully, making a cute face at him as she poked him in the back as he opened the door and they got inside. She kicked her sandals off just in side the door, and started to tug off his hoodie. She hung it up there, and fully plotted to leave it there too. She'd had the thing way too long. Then she peeked her head around as they walked through towards the living room, and she beamed brightly at seeing Oz and Sophie in there. "Hi!" she said. It was clear she was happy to see them.

Oz looked round, even though he'd known who was there before they got there, and he smiled at the two of them as well. "Hey, guys." he said. He was watching them as they walked in, paying attention to everything. Scent, body language, everything else he could monitor and people found him creepy for. He was just...checking.

Dean was aware of the way Oz checked - possibly not the full extent, but he was an observant lad and he put things together. And he also tended to modify his behaviour accordingly to adapt to that kind of thing. So, he hung back a little, letting Thia go further into the room than he did, and looking at Oz, rather than paying her any more attention. "So - we were talking about Thia learning stuff," he said, launching right into things. "And - everything's got a bit derailed since we're all split up," he explained. "And I was thinking that maybe I could pick Thi up on my way home each day and bring her here and she could start joining in on the training again."

Oz nodded. "Yeah, that can work." he said. He didn't mind teaching them both, he'd already said more than once he would do that, so he was cool with it. He'd sort of vaguely miss getting to spend some time with Dean without the girl around, but without her around 24-7 he was getting a little of that. Dean was just slightly less chatty again, which was to be expected, he supposed.

Lullaby looked happy, then asked more. "I was wondering too if I could borrow one of the bows from the other house, and arrows to practice with? I can probably do that on my own every day and stuff. If no one minded, I'd like to just kind of work at that..." She looked ever so slightly fidgety, not sure if she was overstepping, though she doubted that she would be.

Dean looked to Oz for the answer to that question, deferring to him without thought. he was fine with the suggestion, but it wasn't he who had to give that permission, it wasn't his decision to make.

Oz nodded. "Yeah, all of that should be in the basement." he said. "So go ahead. There's more than one bow...I suggest you grab the smaller one, and if that doesn't work for you or whatever, I'll see if we can get you one that's more suited." he added. Because she was in fact, a tiny little thing, and he had no idea how that added up with bows.

Sophie watched the others talk, not really joining it - the talk of weapons training, well, it wasn't really her area, though she gave Lullaby a smile of greeting. She'd been quiet lately anyway, doing what had to be done, but keeping herself much more to herself than normal. Dean hadn't even noticed, being too preoccupied himself, or so it seemed, and she'd been making efforts to try and not be too withdrawn when she was just around Oz. Possibly she would have made more effort with Lullaby, to talk to her, but the conversation topic was a good excuse to just keep quiet, not get involved.

"We can go find you one now, if you'd like," Dean suggested, turning to Thia as he addressed her.

Lullaby looked round at Dean and made a cute face at him. "You know, I am absolutely positive that it can wait." Then she paused. "Actually, where are they? Here in this basement, or back at the other basement?" she asked, totally not sure at all. Had they been practicing with bows and arrows or moved on to something else? She actually kind of kept up with what they were doing when she'd been living with them but didn't know any more.

"They're here," Sophie said, finally speaking up, since this was more her area. "All the weapons are downstairs in the trunk. It's up against the far wall, under the shelves," she told them.

"Oh! Well...then yeah, I guess we can do that right now then." she said, eyes hesitating on Sophie for a moment. There was a flicker of a worried expression that crossed her features, and if she hadn't been standing there with two boys who would probably be wondering what the hell was up, she would have asked Sophie if she was alright. It would be a bit too on the spot right now though, and figured if she did it, she wouldn't get an honest answer just because it was on the spot. Maybe she'd text her tomorrow, and see. Because there was a vague blackness around her. Nothing thick, nothing even that overwhelmingly noticeable, but there. She'd seen it before, but had chalked it up to other reasons, and those should have been at least a bit better by now, but...it wasn't, apparently. Maybe it wasn't any of her business, but...she'd probably text. Just to see. Or something. And you'll be told that she's fine, thanks. But no one could say she hadn't tried, she supposed. So, she gave Sophie a little smile just for her. "Thank you." she said sincerely, before she looked back at Dean. "Lead on."

Dean noticed nothing strange about Sophie at all - for a boy who could be remarkably observant, he was still a self-centered teen about a lot of things and he simply led Thia back out of the room, heading for the basement in the small house. It was weird, he thought to himself as they hit the bottom of the stairs down. This room actually reminded him of the basement back at the other house. It was probably the identical cage in the corner that did it, he reminded himself.

She walked down the steps and had a similar feeling to Dean's. That there was just a lot of samey-feeling going on. Though, that actually could be chalked up to a good thing, considering she thought they both missed home. "So is it weird that because this place is kinda reminiscent of home, I like it down here?" she asked as she looked over at the cage. Which really...that probably made it even more weird. Possibly it could even have graduated to 'fucked up'.

Dean chuckled slightly. "Yeah, I was just thinking that. Thought it before as well. Weird, definitely," he agreed. "Sometimes I think I'd move the bed down here - but yeah. Then I kinda think that's probably weird as well. Though - honestly, that'd be more about privacy and getting away from those two for a while and this is about as far away as I can get, but then - y'know. Hey, my bedroom has a cage in it and that's kinda weird and freaky and I should really shut up about now, shouldn't I?" Dean suggested, falling over his words in an effort to explain himself.

Lullaby looked over and giggled a touch at him. "I dunno. You could have the cool dungeon bedroom. Actually..." she said, eyeing the cage thoughtfully. "If you hung blankets or sheets up on the bars and everything, you could have a kinda mini-room in there. Sectioned off and everything, y'know?" She turned to grin at him. "It'd be unique!" she told him. "Possibly really freaky, but no one could tell you you were unoriginal." she finished sagely. She didn't comment on the fact that she'd actually thought him having a room directly next to Oz and Sophie's had to be amazingly uncomfortable for him. It had crossed her mind and the less they ever talked about his cousin and her boyfriend's sex life the better. So that just wasn't getting talked about. Ever, really.

"Definitely unique," he agreed, crossing to the chest and throwing back the lid. "So," he said, looking over at her as he spoke. "Wanna come pick your weapon of choice?" he suggested. Because weaponry was so less weird a subject than willingly sleeping in a cage - something which he was betting Oz wouldn't let him do anyhow, since he'd want it on the full moon.

Lullaby took one last look at the cage, then headed over, thrumming her fingers over the bars as she did so, til she came to stand next to him. "My weapon of choice...my weapon of choice...hm." She reached out and picked up one of the compound bows, and hefted it up. It was heavier than it looked, and she tested the weight first, before she stood back from him adjusted around a bunch, then tried to see if she could even pull the string back. Not being able to do that would negate the entire thing.

Dean shifted to lean back against the wall and watch her. It was oddly strange, looking at her with a weapon in her hands. Not something he'd ever really imagined before, even if he'd actually seen it. It was just that on the few times he'd seen it, they'd been in the middle of a crisis and concentrating on her had been the last thing on his mind.

She wasn't paying attention to his focus on her, as she worked out how to hold onto it properly. She shifted her stance again, to what felt more natural, and slid her fingers down the string as she held it out steady, and she pulled it back. It was far harder than she thought it was going to be, so it took effort, but she could do it. She also made herself hold it for a few long moments, before she released it, and she figured it made a thwang sound, just by the breeze the string created as it whipped by her cheek, and the vibration in the bow itself. "I think I can work with this." she decided with a nod, before she turned her eyes back over on him.

"Good, we should find you arrows then," Dean said, not trying to hide that he'd been watching her. Of course he'd been watching her - she'd been trying somethig new. It was only natural that he'd watch her doing it. See: excuse. He did, however, lean forward and start looking for the arrows, coming out with a bundle after a moment and passing them over.

She had been figuring he'd be paying attention, so it didn't even register, really. "Okay." she said, taking the arrows. She rolled her shoulder slightly. "Was my arm shaking really bad when I was holding the string back?" she asked. She knew it had been trembling, and she could feel a slight sting in her fingers where she'd been holding it. This? Was probably going to take getting used to. She anticipated being sore from it for a while.

"A little," he allowed. "It's hard work, isn't it?" he added, getting to his feet. Guns were much easier. Guns were scarily easy, in fact. They didn't exactly take a huge amount of skill, or so he figured anyway. Anyone could be good with a gun with a bit of practice. "You'll have to work on your upper body strength - though if you start getting all muscly..." he said, but he bit off the admonition that fitted on the end of that sentence, since he didn't have any say in that now, did he?

"If I start getting all muscly...what?" Lullaby asked, gasping a little with a grin and a laugh. She poked his shoulder. "I'll be a short, midget-like girl with big arms and look really weird and disproportionate? How 'bout I definitely not do that? I think I'm good as is, just...I'll get a little stronger. So my arm doesn't shake, and then we'll call it good. I don't really feature myself for being all grr-thia." She had scars, that made her enough of a freak. She didn't share that sentiment, however.

"Yeah, yeah, something like that," Dean agreed, going with her alternate sentence-end. That was better than what he'd been going to say. or what he was thinking, which was that he liked her all small and petite and everything. he didn't want that to change. but then, it wasn't his choice, was it? He had to keep telling himself that. What he wanted had no bearing on anything. "But yeah - I'm sure you'll do fine and you'll probably end up being better at it than I am. Which isn't saying much, really."

"I'll see. I might just suck really horribly bad at it and I'll be embarrassed to even pick it up again." she said. Since that was a distinct possibility. "But I'll try it out, and let you know and everything. I need something to do, and something that helps me feel slightly more useful." She spotted a case for the bow, and started to put it in there, putting the arrows in as well before she picked it back up and shrugged it over her shoulder. Damn it was heavy. "Are we done hanging in the dungeon?" she asked. "Or are we staying here?" Which really...she didn't necessarily mind either way.

"Well, we can stay here, or we can go up to my room. That was your room. that other room upstairs," he suggested, lightly, making a joke out of the fact that this place was home-that-wasn't-home, for both of them.

"Ahh yes. The crazy merry go round room." Lullaby said, grinning at him. "Yeah, let's go up there. You said you'd show it to me." she added, heading for the stairs. Not that she figured it would look that much different. She imagined Dean was trying to make this as temporary a situation as possible, even in feel. Or maybe that was just how she did it. She knew she had that going on, ever since she'd left the main house. Hell, how long had it even taken her to really feel settled there? Her things had gotten put away initially because Dean had put her stuff away.

"Because it's really changed that much, right?" Dean laughed, unknowingly echoing her thoughts. Really, the only difference was that Sophie had changed the sheets on the bed and the drawers had his clothes in them. Oh, and his computer was set up on a table by the window, though he didn't have a proper desk - there really wasn't room for one. Dean didn't try and get past her as they headed upstairs - she knew exactly where she was going, after all.

Lullaby headed up the steps, then up to his room, opening up the door and letting herself in. Since it was their destination, she could do that without waiting for him. She shrugged the gear off of her shoulder and set it down by the door, before she went and flopped face first down onto his bed. It had been comfy when she'd been sleeping in it. She liked it ten million times better than the one at the other house, which was a lot older, and stiffer, and oh yeah, there was that part where the house hated her anyhow. So she hadn't been sleeping properly, and when she did sleep, she tended to have dreams she wouldn't ever repeat to anyone ever ever ever upon pain of death.

Dean followed her into the room, hesitating for a moment by the door, before leaving it half open and heading over to the bed. He sat down on the bottom of it, leaning back slightly against the foot board, his eyes on her. He wanted to check just how tired she actually was right now, but would that come across as a suggestion that he take her back to that house? How long could he actually avoid doing that for, anyway?

She smiled a little to herself, then curled up on her side, looking across at him. "I like this bed." she informed him. "It's more comfy than the new one." It was! "Hey, your computer is here." she noted. "You could poke me on skype if you were bored sometime." she said. Assuming she was on the laptop. She wondered after she said it if that was a weird suggestion. To her, texting was fine and everything but she would rather see him. And if she couldn't see him in person, she'd take a little crappy webcam version of him. Anything was better than just little words on her phone. It wasn't really like Dean did smileys or much like that.

"If I'm bored, I'd rather just drive over and see you, but okay," he allowed, kicking his shoes off and pulling his feet up onto the bed. "Andy's been asking for your details though - I hadn't realised you'd always just been talking to him on my account," he said, pasing that along, even though he'd prefer for Andy to go to hell about it all. But, she seemed to get on with the guy and Dean wasn't going to get into anything that separated her from other people, even ones who just wanted to flirt with her.

Lullaby propped herself up on her elbows, and reached up to tug one of the pillows out from beneath the blanket, and she hugged it, settling comfortably again, eyes on him. She wasn't thinking that she wanted to reach her hand out and tug him over. Really. "Has he? Guess I have to get a new one then. I hadn't even thought about that, but yeah, I guess it's rude of me to just...drop off the face of the planet and stuff." she said. Not that she especially wanted to talk to Andy...his heavy flirting going on was amusing sometimes but he kind of laid it on thick. And she got the impression that he wasn't actually catching on to the fact that she didn't necessarily reciprocate it.

"It's been a hard few weeks," Dean told her, completely understanding of why she might not want to talk to anyone who didn't know what was going on, not realising that that had little to do with anything. "And - if you wanted to talk to me, you'd need to get your own account, right?" though he'd still prefer to talk with her in person, like this.

"Yeah, I'll do that later, or tomorrow or something." she decided. "Then send you contact information and everything. But you know if you wanted to drive over and see me instead for things, you could always do that too." she said, beaming at him just for a minute. She was feeling better, and that was sinking in fairly quickly. It wasn't his room, or his closet, but it was better than most places and she felt truly comfortable. Which was something she hadn't been feeling in ages. ...or what felt like ages. When one's state of being was a constant underlying feeling of Wrong and Restless...yeah. Time seemed to drag quite a lot. Randomly, she poked his knee with her bare toe.

He dropped his eyes to her feet, then looked back at her, cocking an eyebrow. "What?" he asked, curiously, wondering if there was a reason he'd just been poked.

She gave him an impish smile and poked him again. "Nothin." she said. And poked him again. She also laughed a little bit, even if there truly was no reason at all for it besides she was feeling playful right then.

He grabbed her foot the second time round, holding it in his hands. "Really?" he asked, eyeing her, not letting her foot go, wondering what her next move would be, his thumbs resting lightly against the ball of her foot, though he didn't move them at all.

"Yeah-huh." she said. And she attempted to poke him in the side with her other toe. Which was a little more difficult to manage, considering she was laying on that side, but she put the effort in regardless. "Nothin. You're just sitting there, and there's this big invisible blinking neon sign above your head that says 'poke me!' The sign compels me. I have to obey." she told him in serious tones--but she couldn't wipe the grin off of her features.

"Pity," Dean told her, sounding genuinely sorry about that. "because you have 'tickle me' written in pink crayon o the bottom of your foot. And I, also, am compelled to obey," he told her, before shifting his right hand, still holding her foot in his left, to run his fingers over the sole of her foot.

The reaction was immediate. She curled up quick, making a high pitched squeak as she already started to reach for his hand. Lullaby probably would have made some verbal protest, but there was giggling going on. She was closer then, since when she'd curled, she'd curled inwards towards him. "Nooooooo." she protested when she managed to find her voice, but it was a damn weak protest, and she was still giggling a little bit, and tensed, in case he did it again.

"You still compelled?" he asked her, stilling his fingertips against her foot, though he didn't lift them at all. Her foot was cold against his skin - she was always just that little bit colder than he'd expected, but he knew that was normal for a fade.

"I might be. I'm trying to resist!" She was grinning at him, and her eyes narrowed just a little as she slowly reached out her hand towards his side, like she was going to poke him, sort of testing how far she could push it before he tickled her again. Really, she could have tried to get her foot away from him and all, but she didn't.

Dean curled a finger round and drew it very slowly and softly a couple of inches down the sole of her foot, keeping his eyes on her face, though he could see her hand in his peripheral vision just fine. "Try. Harder," he advised, enjoying this, the depression of earlier entirely lifted by now.

She made more little squeaky sounds between rashes of giggles as he did that, and she squirmed, but didn't actually stop. Not until she was nearly there. Then she dramatically untensed, and seemed to flop. "Oh! The effort of resisting has drained me!" she told him. Before she reached up quickly to tickle his side instead of poking it.

He hadn't actually expected her to tickle him - possibly he was somewhat naive in that respect - and so when she did, it caught him off guard and he collapsed like a rag doll onto his side, laughing uncontrollably, letting go of her foot to bat her hand away. "Gah, no - stop it!" he exclaimed, through the laughs.

Lullaby gasped, and of course took that opportunity to not at all stop anything, and instead she tickled him more, considering he was nicely down on her level now. Which was quickly gonna change, as she pushed herself up to get better leverage on him. Which she knew she'd probably lose the advantage in about .2 seconds, considering she had absolutely no tolerance for being tickled and lost all ability to function when it happened, but hey--she was taking what she could get. "Never!" she decided to answer him, but really, it took a second because she was busy laughing.

Dean brought his legs up, curling up into a foetal position as he tried to make himself as small a target as possible for tickling, hoping that she'd stop on her own. Either that or he was going to have to fight back - she'd leave him no choice in the matter. His cheeks were already beginning to hurt from laughing so hard.

Stopping wasn't really an option for her, she'd resisted on at least two occasions tickling him like this so she was going to take the opportunity now. It was a moral imperative. She simply couldn't live with herself if she didn't. Plus, it was fun, and stress reducing, and they both probably needed that. She leaned over him to keep tickling him, being tiny and quick occasionally had odd advantages, like when you wanted to get at someone's side when they were trying to be all curled up. Which she was aware left her open to counter attack, but oh well.

She wasn't stopping. Shit - that meant that he was going to have to stop her himself. "Right, that's it," he growled, grabbing hold of her wrists and pulling them away from his side, pushing her back as he sat up, using the momentum to change their positions. He gave her a gentle push backwards and let her go, not following her down as she rocked backwards.

She giggled and fell backwards onto her back, and she was laughing, grinning up at him. She looked far too pleased with herself, and her cheeks were flushed from the whole ordeal. She held her hands up just in case he decided to try and pay her back. And she was having a great lot of trouble stopping laughing. She'd quit for a little bit, then giggle again. She looked pleasantly guilty, and generally impishly happy.

Dean looked at her for a moment, then shuffled back down to the bottom of the bed again, bringing his knees up in front of him and loosely resting both hands on the footboard of the bed behind him. He shook his head to shuffle his hair back into place, since that had mussed it all up, then followed that with running a hand through it, before returning to lightly holding the footboard again, trying to look casual about that. "See where poking gets you?" he said, after a moment or two.

Lullaby watched him go, still smiling and intermittently laughing, watching him get himself all situated again. "What, getting to hear you laugh like never before and winning a tickle battle?" she asked. She mock gasped, rolling on her side again and hugging the pillow as she curled around it. "My god whyever would I do that again?!" she asked dramatically. "Oh wait cuz I totally won...." she decided, grinning.

"No, I stopped you - just because I'm too much of a gentleman to fight back," Dean argued back. Which was really more the truth than she'd ever know. Since seeing her there and then he'd wanted to continue it, but his mind hadn't been so much on the fighting part. Which was why he was currently right over here. Away from her. Distance: it was your friend.

"And I stopped cuz you weren't fighting back. So, I was taking pity. Which means it was a concession, and I still totally won." She pumped one fist in the air. "I win!" she declared, then let it flop back down to the bed. She was starting to get her breath back now, but couldn't get her smile to calm down. "See, I could have kept being all mean. And if your chivalrous attitude is your downfall, well that's not my fault. You'll learn, one day." she informed him, giggling again. There was a part of the back of her mind that really wanted him to come back over. Really really. Which...should really probably mean she should excuse herself for a second or something, but she didn't want to. She was happy right where she was. Or, mostly. She'd be happier if he were over with her.

"Okay - you won, I'll give you that one. Just this once," Dean told her, with purposeful condescension, before he gave her a smirk, bringing his hands forward to wrap around his legs, shifting his position to rest his head on his knees - a compact little ball o' Dean.

She giggled again, and reached back for the other pillow on the bed, which she threw at him. "Just this once? How terribly big of you." she teased, sticking her tongue out at him cutely. She stayed where she was, and resisted a few urges, dismissing all of them as spectacularly bad ideas. She thought he looked cute there though, where he was. She just didn't want him over there. Still. She needed to get off of that track, really. But she wanted to snuggle him. She hadn't done that in what felt like ages and ages and she missed him. Which...was an incredibly weird statement, considering she still saw him damn near every day. Still.

"Yeah, I'm a... nice like that," he told her, ducking out of the way of her pillow throw, so the thing went sailing passed him and hit the table instead, knocking the mouse flying off the table with a crash and setting the monitor rocking on the edge. Dean jumped up off the bed and steadied it, moving it back from the edge a little - he needed a bigger table, really. or a proper desk, but there really wasn't room in this small bedroom that had only really been designed to have a bed in it and nothing else. "I preferred my old room," he said with a slight sigh, turning back round to her.

Lullaby blinked as that happened and she immediately sat up. "Oh, shit I am so sorry!" she said, immediately of course feeling really bad. She crawled over to the edge of the bed and winced, looking at the computer to make sure that she hadn't broken anything. It didn't look like anything had, but still. "Sorry." she said again, looking up at him. "And...yeah, I did too. I miss your room." She specifically missed his closet. "I miss my room. I miss home." she admitted. Again, she curbed an impulse, and wondered if she shouldn't duck out for a few minutes just to get her head back into reality land.

Dean bent and picked up the mouse, putting it back on the table before grabbing the pillow and turning to stand at the bottom of the bed - not a huge move, given the lack of space in the smaller room. He hugged the pillow loosely over his stomach and nodded. "Me too - but Billy's working on it already, so many we ca..." he broke off, reminding himself that she'd already been moved out, hadn't she? It wasn't like she was just over at that other house because there was no room here. He was still going with his plans though. Even if she wouldn't be moving back in. "Maybe you could come, like, visit or something," he finally finished with a shrug, hating what that idea suggested. He really needed to learn to let go.

She watched him as he changed track there. It was so blatant she couldn't possibly miss it, and she made a little bit of a sad face. She also wondered if he'd let her hug him. He kinda looked a little lost right there, hugging his pillow. She finished crawling over towards him and sat up on her knees, reaching out to take the pillow away so she could hug him. If he'd let her. She hoped he did. She didn't quite know what to say. Then spoke anyhow. "I'm not supposed to be there forever." she said. She didn't think she'd be able to live there forever. She'd twitch herself to death. The only reason she tried to handle it now was because it was meant to be temporary.

"I know," Dean told her, allowing her to take the pillow from him, resting his hands on the end of the bed as she did so. He was just aware that she'd been gone less than a week and he missed her so much. And sure, he could write off some of that as worry about this weird house thing, but even taking that into account - he missed her. She'd only been meant to be staying with him because she had nowhere else to go. He'd promised himself that he'd be fine if she moved out and had somewhere else to go and yet - he missed her. He didn't have a right to do that - she was his best friend. He should be able to get through this without missing her like this. It wasn't like he ever got to missing Andy or anything when he'd been back home and still saw the guy every day, just because he lived in another part of the village. It was - that was just how it was supposed to work.

She hugged him, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. There was that Dean-scent that he had about him, that she appreciated. And it was possible she missed. His hoodie she wore all the time so it didn't have that anymore, which could possibly have been just a tiny part of her motivation for leaving it here tonight. She wondered if she was being clingy right now. She was usually aware of the levels of that in herself, knew that when she saw him, when he showed up to see her that she needed not to latch on or anything, and she did well with that. But that didn't mean she didn't have the urge to do that. And right now she was finding less reason not to just for a few minutes. Really there would only be one thing that would be better, and she didn't have a way to voice that. "I'll be back eventually." she said, realizing only distantly that that statement was almost so late it was no longer connected to the initial thread of conversation.

He rested his arms across her back, hugging her loosely as she hugged him. Normally he returned hugs better than that, but he was warring with himself about his reactions and his emotional cues right now, trying to resist the urge to admit to her that he missed her. he shouldn't do that - she was already aware there was something wrong. he knew that just from the way that she was placating him right now, that much was obvious. He needed to just suck it up and get on with it. "...yeah," he agreed, realising he should probably respond to her, even if it was only a word.

Things ran through her head, but she rejected every single one of them. Statements, actions, everything. So she stayed where she was, at least a little while longer, trying to figure out what kind of a statement his had been. Was he just agreeing because he was agreeing? Did he not want her to come back? Was he twitching over not actually residing in the same house as much as she was? It was such a non-answer of an answer. She gave him a tighter squeeze for a moment before she contemplated letting go and sitting back. Which she might need to do really soon, so she didn't like...lean back and try to take him with her.

Dean didn't say anything for the longest time, not sure what he could say that was acceptable right now. He knew he should probably suggest he took her back, but he couldn't bring himself to offer. She'd have to ask. But - he kind of wanted to fill the meantime with reasons for her to stay, so she wouldn't ask. Which he probably shouldn't do. Like he shouldn't tell her he missed her when he really, really did. "I - would you teach me some more sign language?" he asked her, in the end.

She nodded, then pulled back enough to look up at him. She gave him a little smile, then she shifted back, reaching out to take his hands and she tugged them, hoping he'd come with her. She wanted him to stay close. That was probably not so terribly good of her, but whatever, it very definitely was what she wanted, and she had an excuse. If she was going to teach him things, she might have to correct, so...he should be close. So she could do that. "C'mon. Sit with me."

Dean didn't go with the tug, instead walking round the side of the bed before sitting down and shuffling toward her a little more, so he ended up in the same position regardless, just where she wanted him. Just like a good student.

She smiled and sat indian style in front of him. "Okay, so what do you want to learn tonight?" she asked, signing as she spoke, just because that always helped. "Anything specific? Can you remember how to sign my name?" she asked. She could focus in on this, this was easier for her. Having something solid. Even if she was aware that it was dark outside the window, and she would need to be brought home sometime. ...sometime wasn't right now, and she would put it off as long as she could, really.

"Like this," Dean told her, doing the spiral down that was her name. That one he knew he'd never forget. "But, okay - since you're probably going to be the only person I talk to with this, let's... teach me something that's going to be useful. And - can I just say that it's fucking warped that the first thing that comes to mind is 'are you okay?'. The lives we lead, right?" he asked her with a laugh to cover the lie. The first thing that had come to mind had been 'I miss you', followed by a few other choice and highly rejected phrases.

When he signed her name right, she looked terribly pleased about that. It was nice to know he'd retained that one, and well. She gave a little light half smile at the rest. "No, I think that's probably one of our most common phrases, so yeah...Might as well teach you that. Our lives are in fact, massively fucked up." she said. "But hey, now it can be fucked up in sign." So that would be great..but might help. She signed it for him, speaking out the words as she did so so he'd know which part signified which word. She signed it three times, first really slowly with all the parts clearly separated out, then she went faster, then normal speed to show him how things flowed together.

He gave her his full and somewhat intense concentration, signing the phrase in part then total, trying to mimic her gestures, then repeating them a few times after she'd finished, hoping they were right.

She watched, smiling. "Not bad." she said. "okay....let's see." she said. "This one's easy. Talk to me." she signed, which she knew she had a habit of saying to him, and he occasionally put back to her. She picked out a few more phrases to teach him, among which were 'I'm Sorry', since that sure as hell got handed out a lot, standards like 'please' and 'thank you', 'goodnight'. Little things. Then, she threw in one that she didn't explain, but her name was clearly in it.

Dean copied each and every phrase, practicing each until he had it down and only then moving on to the next. He copied the unexplained one, going through it and only then giving her a look. "So, what did that one mean?" he asked, since she hadn't offered a translation. He paused, then smiled a little and took a guess, going through the action as he said it. "'Whatever you say, Thia'?" he suggested.

She smiled at him, happy he'd pegged it. "Well, you said you wanted to learn things that'll be useful for us communicating." she said. "So, yeah. Now you can say 'Yes, Thia, whatever you say' completely silently."

"And my life will be all the richer for it," Dean concluded. "Okay - so you taught me 'are you okay'. How about some answers to that. Something a bit more descriptive than 'yes' and 'no'. Since I don't have the handy 'I can see you exuding black stuff from your head' indicators either," he teased.

She laughed. "So I keep telling you. I'm glad you've finally accepted that." she said. "And you have the heart monitor." she added. "But okay. Answers to that. We'll start with 'I'm extremely awesome' and work our way to 'abysmally bad'. So we'll at least have varying degrees of 'yes' and 'no'. I'm trying to think of a good phrasing for other things too. Like if there's danger, or to be quiet, stay hidden, stuff like that." Which was also a testament to how their lives worked. They actually needed something like that.

Dean had been thinking that as well - sign could be a nicely awesome way of letting each other know how bad things were without anyone else knowing what they were really saying. Which he knew was bad, but at least it might be a good plan with it, one day. "All the heart monitor tells me is if you're rates up - I don't know ever if that's in a good or a bad way," he reminded her as he prepared to be led through the next lesson.

"I suppose." She said thoughtfully. "But I'm pretty sure you could piece it together, if we were within eyesight." she added. And, say, I'm not having heart-pounding action going on for reasons you don't know about and totally aren't going to find out about either. she added on mentally. "And alright, we'll just go with a couple varying degrees of danger too...from 'yes extremely bad danger watch out right now' to 'there might be trouble'." she decided, starting to walk him through that, keeping things as simple as possible. She wondered if she'd be teaching him his name tonight. She knew she'd picked it out...it was more a matter of bravery.

"Maybe," he allowed as he continued to copy. He hoped that he remembered all of this, but he wasn't bad with active things, gestures and movements. Visual stimuli. It was just names he had a problem with - faces he was good with. So hopefully this would stick - it had last time, at least.

She walked him through that, then went through simple commands, like 'stay there', 'come here', 'go around', 'I'll come to you', simple things that could mean important things. Actions you needed to take or not take. That would be a good thing to be able to say without being within earshot. She was turning her mind towards 'what might we need to communicate accurately if we were across the street from one another'. Which could all be simplified down fairly well, which she thought was a good thing. Just having basics they might need down would be helpful. "You're doing well." she told him, probably a little randomly. But he was, and she figured he ought to know.

"Tell me that when you get me to repeat all of these next week and you get to see how many I remember," he told her, serious in that - he wanted her to keep testing him on this stuff, randomly if needs be. But the time to realised he couldn't remember it was not the time it was really needed.

Smiling, she nodded. "I will." she said. "But you're getting the motions down well. And again, a lot of it is pretty intuitive. So I'm sure you can manage fine." she said, confidence in his abilities as usual, very pronounced. Then she went onto a grimmer subject, and taught him to go through different degrees of injury, so they could let each other know if they were hurt, and just how hurt. She gave him signs for bleeding, broken bones, and how to gauge it from minor to major.

Any comment Dean may have had to her confidence was lost in the new onslaught of things to remember until he called a halt some time later. "Okay, okay - I think that's enough for now, or I really am going to forget what goes where," he protested, good naturedly. He'd enjoyed their session, but his brain really could only hold so much information, as much as he wished it could hold more. That way he could put off inevitably the issue of having to take her back to that house, or maybe if he had a bigger brain he could come up with a reason why she should stay.

She smiled at him and reached out to muss his hair. "But you did a good job!" she told him. "You get an 'A'." she told him. "I could probably sneak back to my old room, and find you one of the workbooks that I used to give people when I taught them. It'll be easier for you to look at things and y'know, get the less important signs looked at. Like 'puppy' or 'house' or what have you. I'll see about that maybe sometime next week or something if there's time." She flopped over onto her side, curling on it, and she snagged his pillow again to put under her head. It's probably time I should go. she thought. But didn't say, because she didn't want to.

"Thanks, that'd be good," Dean agreed, though part of him really didn't want to learn from a book. Part of him wanted to completely monopolise her time and have her teach him everything herself. But he knew there were parts of him that weren't exactly reasonable. Like the part that just watched as she curled up, rather than suggesting he took her back now.

She didn't say anything for a few long moments, but then reached her hand out to him. It was something that she kept debating, unsure entirely whether or not she was actually going to do it, and in the end she did. Because she missed him, and she wanted him over there with her even for just a couple of minutes. She'd be happy then, really. Now, she was pretty sure he wasn't going to follow through, but she had to see.

Dean paused for a fraction of a moment, then uncurled, reaching out to take her hand, shuffling enough to make it an easy take, though he didn't go any further as he gave it a little squeeze.

Watching him, she was glad when he did take her hand, and she pulled. Not hard or anything, but...enough. Enough that it was clear she wanted him closer. Over with her. But she definitely didn't pull hard enough that he couldn't resist, or it would be hard for him to do that. Basically, she just suggested without saying anything what she wanted, and left it up to him.

He didn't need to be told twice as he went with the tug and curled up next to her, slipping an arm around her shoulders. The sign lesson had done a whole lot to calm his more runaway thoughts of earlier and put his mind back on an even keel, which he was grateful for, so he didn't have to worry about that. He was more concerned about taking her back to that house now. Or, at least, avoiding doing that for as long as possible.

A soft little smile settled over her features, and she shifted a little closer to him, getting herself comfortable. She felt some of the tension in her frame ease, even if she hadn't been aware she was carrying it--or even why. Either way it was nice, just being where she was. She let out a breath she'd been holding, and let her eyes drift shut for a few moments too, just kind of letting herself feel better for a bit.

Dean wondered if the hair thing she did to him that always put him to sleep so effectively would work on her, and if so, whether he dared try it. She did it to him, so it was obviously classified as a 'friends' thing in her head, so maybe that was okay. Because if she fell asleep, then he wouldn't have to take her back. And she'd been so tired lately - she needed the sleep. Maybe if she spent a night away from that house, she'd get that sleep. It would be better for her. It took him a minute or two to work up the nerve, but eventually he lifted his fingers to her hair, softly stroking them through the short locks, trying to do to her what she did to him, his heart hammering in case the only effect was for her to call him on... something.

Now, she was in fact, surprised. Shocked, even, but she didn't really show it, save for a tiny exhale of a contented sound. She was exhausted, and that? Felt really nice. Fantastically nice even. So nice that it had pretty much the exact effect he was going for. She curled in against him even more, and it really didn't take her long to drift. She just relaxed, and then she was dreaming, inside ten minutes.

Dean stopped as he realised she'd actually fallen asleep, that that was, in fact, really quite good for that. He wasn't at all sleepy himself yet, but that didn't matter. She was sleeping, which meant she wasn't going anywhere. He'd work the rest out later.