Secrets

Who: Thom and Leija
Where: Phone call, then his house
When: Afternoon onwards

Thom was didn't expect his mom to be home when he got in, so he didn't even bother calling as he walked into the quiet, empty house. There was a note on the front of the fridge from the housekeeper saying they needed more bleach. And another from his mom telling him that she'd be late home tonight and not to bother cooking - she'd grab something at the office if he wanted to order takeout. He left both of them where they were and opened the door instead, grabbing a soda and a slice of the half eaten cherry pie that was sitting on a shelf. He was thoroughly depressed about the entire day so far - the talk with Chance, then with David had revealed absolutely nothing. No, not true - it had given them some numbers, but nothing else. The drive home had been undertaken in near silence from both of them, though Isaac had mentioned a get together thing the following night that he should turn up to. Thom had made the usual 'yeah, sure' noises, but neither of them had been particularly upbeat or enthusiastic.

Now was not a good time to be alone in an empty house, he decided as he played with the pie with the end of his fork rather than actually eating it. He pushed the plate away from himself and crossed to the phone, wondering if he could bug Leija into doing something - or at least if she could pull him out of the funk he could feel coming on.

Leija was outside. Technically speaking. She was on the back porch, her feet up on the chair she'd plunked down in, looking at the rain running pouring down. She'd been trying to get a headache all day, in that way where it was there and then not again. The sort-of talk with her dad from the night before was cycling through her head on endless repeat, and she hadn't touched the violin sitting on the table in front of her. She wanted to play, but she didn't. She wanted to call Thom, but she didn't. She wanted to be a normal bubbly teenage cheerleader girl, but she didn't. She wanted ... all options at once, like he'd said. That was part of the problem. But the door between her and the kitchen was closed and her head was filled with noise, so it wasn't Leija that picked up the phone.

After three or four long rings, an adult male voice came on the line. "Yes?" John Christiensen answered mildly.

Thom had got so used to Leija always answering the phone, that hearing a male voice on the other end of the line nearly made him drop the phone in surprise. His fork, he did drop and it hit the plate with a clatter of metal against china as he sat up a little straighter, even if he couldn't be seen. But he refused to stutter his way through this, so he took a moment to compose himself before speaking. "Hi - is Leija there please?" he asked in his most pleasant and polite tone.

Leija's father looked up from his work. His sharp ears noted the brief noise that most likely indicated surprised. This must be the mystery boy. He covered admirably, and the tall man smiled faintly on the other end of the line. "Yes, I believe she's here someplace," he answered, rising slowly to start looking for his daughter. The portable phone went with him. "Can I tell her who's calling?"

"Thom - I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Thom asked, firmly fixed in 'polite' mode now. He wondered if she'd actually told her father about him yet.

"Not at all," he said, passing through the kitchen and catching sight of Leija's messy red ponytail through the window in the back door. At least the kid had manners. It was more than he could say for his outspoken daughter every now and then. John didn't open the door quite yet, examining her posture. "I'm Leija's father, good to speak with you. Perhaps sometime soon we'll have you over for dinner."

Thom was slightly surprised at the offer, but at least it answered his unspoken question - her father obviously knew who he was. "It'd be a pleasure, sir," he said, maintaining the tone. He wondered if he was meant to make small talk now, or whether Mr Christiensen would pass him over to Leija and the silence which resulted from his uncertainty hung between them.

Remembering being a young man himself and the pins and needles feelings that came from being faced with a girl's father, John didn't make him wait long. He opened the back door and stepped out. Leija looked around, noted the phone in his hand, and raised her eyebrows. "Thom, for you," her dad said, holding out the receiver with a little smile. Yes, I know his name now, that faintly amused expression said. Leija's cheeks darkened and she took the phone, waiting until her dad had retreated back into the kitchen before she put it to her ear. "Hello?" Duh. She rolled her eyes at herself.

"So, that was your dad, huh?" Thom asked, relaxing as he heard the much more familiar voice. "You know, I'd almost gotten so used to you answering the phone that I nearly said something straight off - and then this male voice spoke...."

"Yeah, that was my dad," she said, throwing a suspicious glance over her shoulder at the door. He wasn't there and it was closed. "Sorry about that. ... I'm outside, I didn't hear it." She wondered what that meant he was going to say, but didn't ask.

"That's okay - he invited me for dinner sometime. I take it that means he knows who I am then?" Thom asked, making a mental note that he should let his mom know at some point about Leija, but 'by the way, I have a girlfriend' wasn't exactly the kind of thing you left on a post-it on the fridge.

Well, she couldn't exactly lie. Leija wrinkled her nose just a little. "He knows you exist," she said, then winced. That probably didn't sound very good. "I haven't told him we're really ... going out yet, but he knows there's somebody. And that it's you. Even though he doesn't know you from Adam yet. Besides the name." Okay, she was rambling now. Shutting up time. "How's your day been?"

"So... He knows there's a guy called Thom, that maybe you kinda like?" Thom suggested. "And obviously now he knows that I'm interested too - what with me calling here and everything. And he'll be even more certain of that, because I'm just about to hog to phone line talking to you for hours, so... You don't want to hear about my day," he finished, with a sigh.

He knows that you make me vulnerable and scare the hell out of me, so yeah, you could say that. "Not maybe kinda," she said quietly. "Definitely like. And that's okay, it's not like anybody calls yet anyway. ... if I didn't want to hear, I wouldn't have asked," she pointed out. He didn't sound happy, so it was her turn to straighten up some. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," Thom shrugged - not that she could see that, but it was clear from his tone. He scraped back his chair and started to pace, walking into the living room and then out into the hall. "Just one of those days, y'know? Frustrating. It's nothing, really."

Leija arched a slow eyebrow on her side of the phone. From everything she'd seen, Thom was calm and zen and not easy to ruffle. "I don't believe it's nothing," she stated, though not in a harsh way. Maybe she was wrong, after all. She waited a beat, then added, "I'm here if you want to talk about it." Please do, so I can be distracted.

"It's..." He paused, then gave in. Maybe if he could couch it in sufficiently vague terms. "I've been helping Isaac out," he said, leaning heavily on the 'best friend' excuse. "His sister's... Kaysen's... Not exactly the most popular kid around. She's okay and everything, but she suffers real badly at the hands of the rumour mill. Anyway... At the party... There were rumours flying about how she got into this fight caused by this guy she was with - a senior. With this really, really bad reputation. Who I know gets into fights and things and... Then there were all these rumours flying and Isaac got ahold of them... And so we kinda went to see Chance - that's the guy - today and had a talk with him, then we were trying to track down who was starting shit about Kaysen at the party and... Yeah."

She listened, piecing all that together as best she could. It obviously bothered him if he was rambly about it. Though if he and Isaac had been friends for that long, Leija could see that. And Thom was siblingless -- as far as she knew -- like she was. "And you didn't find anyone?" she provided in a question, picking at the fabric on her pants.

"A few numbers, nothing else," Thom told her, sounding utterly frustrated. "Though, with Kaysen.... Half the school's involved. More probably. She's like the butt of everyone's jokes... And she's done nothing to deserve it, either. Well, not originally - though she's got a tendency towards being hyper-defensive these days, which really doesn't make her easy to deal with...."

She made a soft noise of acknowledgement, frowning over that a touch. She knew that people their age could be cruel bastards, but ... that was a little extreme, from what it sounded like. "Well ..." she started, not at all sure how to help. "Maybe somebody will squeal."

"Maybe...." Thom agreed, not sounding hopeful. "Can we talk about something else?" he asked her, really needing to not be thinking about Kaysen right about now. "How's your day been? Are you feeling better today?"

"It's been okay," she said after a beat, looking out into the driving rain again. She felt vaguely bad that she wasn't more helpful. After he'd gallivanted over the day before and everything to make sure she was okay. "I feel better. ... I have something for you."

That surprised him and peaked his interest. "You do?" he asked, the surprise sounding in his tone as he finally stopped pacing. He'd reached halfway down the basement steps and he sat, resting his elbows on his knees.

"Yes," she answered, smiling faintly at the change in his voice. She was silent for a moment, pretty sure that he expected her to tell him outright. But she wasn't about to do that. "You'll have to be surprised, though."

He chuckled a little at that. "I'm already surprised," he admitted. "Does that count, or do I have to be more surprised when I find out what it is?" he asked her. "And, talking of - when do I get to find out what it is? Cos, really - I'm not good with surprises. And not a lot of people know that." Then again, not a lot of people knew that much about him at all. But she wouldn't know that either, which was refreshing, he realised. To meet someone who had no preconceptions about who you were.

"Whenever you want to see me again, you can find out," she said, examining the rain. She could get to his house in the blink of an eye. But that would be suspicious. Maybe she could play in the storm for a little while on her way ... "Though it might have to be soon, or it'll be a fairly anti-climactic surprise," she added, smiling a little more. "It's not a guitar. Or a car. I'll tell you those right now."

"Leija - if you got me either of those, I'd be floored and demanding to know what bank you robbed," he told her, smiling a little. "Does this mean I'm gonna have to wait? I don't have transport right now - mom has the car and she's already told me she's gonna be late home. And usually that means not until gone ten..." He really really needed his own transport. If just wasn't fair - he was plenty old enough and it wasn't like they couldn't afford it!

She noted absently that she very much liked it when he said her name. "I can come there," she offered quietly. She hoped he'd be agreeable to that; after last time, before they'd gone to the movie, she wasn't so sure. Leija picked some more at her clothes and waited.

"Really? That'd be great," Thom told her, sounding as pleased as he felt. And possibly a touch embarrassed that he had to make her do that. To be almost not-quite eighteen and reliant on your girlfriend for transport - and your brand new girlfriend at that - was really far too embarrassing.

"Okay," she said, her sudden smile evident in her voice. She'd fly, because she loved flying much much more than driving in the rain. Leija stood and started back inside, to change into something that would dry a bit better than what she had on. He'd probably fret over her being soaked to the skin, but she couldn't care about that yet. "I'll be there soon, then. Bearing a surprise."

He chuckled. "I can't wait. I'll - see you soon," he added, with a crooked smile, marvelling over the fact that he already felt better, knowing she'd be on her way.

With a small musing noise, Leija hung up the phone and trotted down the hall. She told her dad where she was going and how she was getting there -- in an honest fashion this time -- went upstairs to change, and pulled her window open. He hadn't put up any sort of fuss about either her going to Thom's house or that she was flying; he was aware that sometimes she just had to do it. Fly, that was. Making sure she had Thom's present secure, Leija climbed out onto the roof over the porch and closed the window behind her. It wasn't cold in the least, so she'd opted for track pants and a bathing suit top. With a long-sleeved t-shirt tied securely around her waist, Leija let her wings free and took to the tumultuous skies.

Thom had remained sitting on the stairs when he'd hung up the phone. He'd hear the doorbell from there and he couldn't really bring himself to move. His life felt slightly more, well, normal now, though he couldn't help but think of what he'd considered this morning. Of finding some way to tell Leija about the magic. Except - nobody but his mom knew about that. And he was hardly the classical image of a witch. And if anyone even mentioned wicca to him, he'd run a mile. All that new agey crap just wasn't him. But that didn't mean the magic didn't work. Really, he had no clue what he was going to do.

She took her time in getting there, speeding through the rain in wide arcs, letting the sting of the drops center her and bring her out of the tired, thoughtful daze she'd woken up in. It was her choice, to give it a try. And if it ended up not working ... well then she'd know, wouldn't she? Then she would know. She wasn't that lucky. After what she estimated would be enough time for one to drive across town, Leija divebombed out of the air and into the side of Thom's yard. She caught herself with one powerful wing-pump enough so that her landing was somewhat soft, and circled around to the front of the house, pulling on the shirt she'd brought as she went. She was soaked through, but she felt so much better already. Standing at his front door and belatedly realizing that she'd forgotten her shoes, Leija rang the doorbell.

Thom had been staring into space until the doorbell rang. It successfully brought him out of it and he bounded up the stairs, phone still clutched in hand, to open the door to her - stopping and staring as he realised she was totally and utterly soaked. "Shit, damn - come in!" he exclaimed, bustling her inside. "What the... You want a towel?" he asked her, looking her up and down.

She was in the process of wringing out her hair some as he opened the door. "Yeah, please," she said with a bright smile, amused at the look on his face. Leija stepped inside, but didn't go any further, lest she drip all over everything. She provided the excuse she'd come up with on the way. "Daddy dropped me off at the start of the street, I wanted to walk in the rain. ... and he needed the car for some stuff."

"From the looks of you, we're talking the very start of the street," Thom observed - that being all the way over the other side of town. "Come on, let's get you dried off," he said, taking her hand and leading her upstairs and into the bathroom. He took a large, fluffy towel out of the airing cupboard and handed it to her, frowning slightly. "Are you... did you want some dry clothes?" he asked her. Damn, but she was soaked through!

Now that she was inside, she felt a little chilled, but Leija shook her head. "Not yet," she answered, taking the towel and wrapping it around her back. She rubbed it quickly over her head, mussing up her hair something awful, and then pulled up one sleeve. "Here," she said, starting to unwrap what looked like a necklace made out of wooden beads from around her slim wrist. She offered it to him, coiled in the palm of her hand. "They're prayer beads. From Tibet."

Thom took them from her and looked at them, blinking a little, a smile spreading on his face. "Where did you get these from?" he asked her, pleased, but slightly and obviously confused.

A very old monk in this very tiny village. He fell down the steps. No one will find him for weeks, maybe, I was there for seven hours. Leija smiled faintly. "My aunt, she travels a lot. Sends me things. They really are from Tibet. They're rosewood, I think, supposedly pretty old." She pulled the towel tighter around her. " ... told you it'd be anticlimactic."

"No, they're really cool. Thank you. I..." Don't quite get why you're giving me these, but they're wicked cool and I'm going to hang them from my bedpost, which you really don't need to know.... "Thank you."

She shrugged a shoulder and nodded a touch. It might've been better if she could tell him the truth, that she had so much stuff she'd collected from various places around the world that she'd been. Small things, sometimes pocketed, sometimes paid for -- with many strange looks -- but they were all a part of her, of her strange and sad life. Because everyone, deep down, was the same. And she wanted him to have a small part of that, even if he couldn't recognize it for what it was.

He frowned a little at the look on her face and brushed a wet, messy strand of hair back, before cupping one cheek softly. "I really like them - and they're not an anticlimax at all. Nobody's ever given me something like that before. Y'know - something from a far off place that I'm never actually gonna be able to go to. It's cool, it's like my own little bit of the world, right here."

Leija looked at him with a faint smile. She hoped in a vague way that someday he'd know the real hands that brought them back. Then chided herself for it. How selfish was that, anyway? He didn't need to be burdened with what she was. She turned her face just enough to kiss the inside of his wrist lightly. "Good," she murmured.

He looked at her for a moment, then stood, taking her hands and pulling her up. "See, if I leave you all wet like that, you're gonna catch a chill. So, I'm thinking downstairs, I can get the fire going - I know, I know, it's supposedly summer, but you're soaked and I think it's warranted. I'll even make hot chocolate. Unless you'd prefer tea."

She had to laugh at that, at least a little. It was so sweet, in a very decisive mother-hen way. "That's so not necessary," she said, smiling at him. "Though hot chocolate would be good. Would it make you feel better if I stole some of your dry clothes? I promise, I never get sick, I don't want to make you sit in a sweatbox."

He paused, looking at her. He had to admit that the thought of her hanging around in his clothes was stupidly appealing in a way he couldn't quite put his finger on, but he had to wonder if that was a good enough reason to agree to that plan. For good measure, he added in the fact that it'd mean she was dry. "Sure, I could loan you some clothes," he told her. "They'll be a bit big, but..." But he didn't look at all bothered by this.

Leija didn't either. And he'd offered earlier, so. She'd always thought it incredibly girly and weird to want to steal your boyfriend's -- because that's what he was now (!!!) -- shirts and stuff, but ... thinking about it, being wrapped up in Thom's scent would by far not be a bad thing. She grinned suddenly. "I wanted to see your room anyway." And she turned and slipped out the door, padding down the hall and peeking in doors.

He followed her out and down the hall as she started being nosey. "Guest room," he called as she opened the first door. "And the other," he added as she darted across the corridor. Both were very boring, but something had to be done with the rooms in the large house that neither he or his mother actually used. Arguably, the place was too big for them, but it was home, so Thom had never questioned the fact that they had multiple rooms that were rarely ever used. He caught up with her in a couple of strides and guided her towards another door. "My room," he supplied, sounding a lot steadier than he actually felt, unable to get quite over the whole 'OMG-girl-in-my-room!' of it all. But then again, they been in her room yesterday - but there wasn't a clothing-change planned yesterday.

The house was more extensive than she'd really ever thought, but Leija took it all in in stride. Someday she'd find out if his mom was a Columbian drug dealer or something. But Thom's room immediately held more interest for her than anything having to do with his mother and she walked into it, eyes skittering everywhere. Her's had been only half-unpacked still, but his? There was a lot of history here. ... only it was going to be hard to pick out, because his room was actually really clean. Weird. She looked around at him with a smirk, amused. He would be the only guy on the planet to clean his room. She briefly considered going to flop on the bed like she owned the place, but decided against it since she was all wet.

Thom was a tidy person by nature, but that had only been upped today since the housekeeper had been in. And, in fact, this had been the first time Thom had actually been into his room since her visit - so he hadn't had a chance to at all disturb the freshly made bed, or track any kind of dirt into the cleaned carpets. The furniture was perfectly positioned and dust free, all his clothes had been put away, laundry taken out - the only thing that was totally untouched was his desk, being that he'd thrown a total shit fit a couple of years ago when she'd thrown out some of his jottings and she'd refused to touch it since. But even that was fairly tidy - his laptop sitting off to one side and a pile of papers on the other, full pieces, random scraps - and his journal right on the top. He walked past her into the room and went over to his dresser, starting to root through, looking for clothes for her. "Erm, what do you want?" he asked. "T-shirt? My jeans are gonna be far too big for you, but I might have some draw string pants round here somewhere..."

Leija spotted what looked like a journal and immediately wanted to pick it up and start rifling through it. She clung to the ends of the towel so she wouldn't, but it made her pin-prickly curious as to whether or not her name was in there. She was willing to bet it was, if that book really was what it looked like. She tried to make herself focus, padding over to stand behind him and look. "Those or shorts or boxers or whatever you've got are fine," she said, not missing a beat on the b-word. She had some at home that she wore like sleep-shorts anyway. Not that they'd ever belonged to anybody but her.

Oh god. He was hit with the mental image of Leija lying on his bed wearing one of his t-shirts and a pair of his boxers and his head went all fuzzy for a moment. His hands stilled on his clothes, before he randomly clutched at the first t-shirt he came to - which was navy blue with a white motive of hands doing 'rock paper scissors'. And as he added a pair of boxers to that, he tried to convince himself that it was only sensible, that they'd fit her much better than anything else he had. That it had been her idea anyhow. But, really - who was he kidding?

If she'd known what sort of an effect that had, she probably would've been surprised that he'd actually given her a pair. She took the offered clothes, and checked the boxers to make sure they had a button on them. She was gonna have to lose her underwear too, and didn't want any sort of ... gapping to be a problem. It wasn't until she'd confirmed that that she really realized that she was handling Thom's boxers. She blinked at the little thrill that gave her. Hrm. She slid a hand lightly over his back and turned to head back down the hall to the bathroom.

Thom flopped down on the bed with an almost inaudible groan as she left the room, his mind still going all sorts of interesting places, a silly smile on his face - until, at least, he ran a hand over his face and told himself to be serious and not be stupid. He sat up, giving himself a minute to centre himself before standing, leaving the bed rather more mussed up than it had been when they first walked in. He walked over to the window and sat on the sill, looking out into the pouring rain, waiting for her to get back.

While she was in there, Leija dried off more thoroughly. She hesitated for a moment, then hung her clothes over the shower curtain rod. His mom supposedly wouldn't be back for a long time, right? So Leija'd make sure to head out before she could walk in and freak about a girl's panties hanging up in the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror for a good stretch of minutes, turning to the side with a newly critical eye. Was she hot? She wasn't sure. She wasn't skinny, by any means, though more of her curves were in her lower half. Was that attractive? Did it matter? He liked to kiss her. He was a guy, so maybe ... were they ever picky? Yes. Surely they were. Leija bit her lip as her eyes ticked up from her butt to the part of one of the scars on her back that she could see. The pink thick almost-kind-of-shiny line of skin, with it's mirror-twin to match over her other shoulderblade. No. Not attractive. Which is why he shouldn't ever have to see them. Hurriedly, she pulled on his big t-shirt and the boxers, folding the waistband up a couple of times so they weren't too baggy on her. At least she'd shaved recently. Taking a steadying breath, she opened the bathroom door and made her way back to his room.

He turned as he heard the bedroom door open again and the moment he saw her he decided that the films, the stories, all that was right - women did look better in your clothes than you did. Or, well, she did anyhow. His eyes were drawn down to fully appreciate her legs, before he caught himself generally staring and stopped, looking back at her face. "Better?" he asked, since he had to say something.

When his eyes stayed on her legs for more than a half-second, Leija's pulse picked up a little. She remembered that she'd always been wearing pants in front of him before, so ... he didn't seem to mind. She offered him a little half-smile that probably -- hopefully -- felt more nervous than it looked, and nodded. "Yeah. They're comfortable."

"And you look a lot less like a drowned rat," he added, with a crooked smile. "Did you need to hang your clothes up to dry?" he asked her, noting she wasn't carrying them.

"I left them ... in the bathroom," she said, pointing a thumb in that direction and raising an eyebrow. "On the shower curtain, is that ... okay?" She looked mildly worried that maybe it wasn't.

He caught the look of worry and shook his head. "No, that's fine," he assured her, standing and leaving the window. "You know, erm - you look really good in that," he said, sounding a lot cooler than he felt.

Leija let out a little laugh and looked down at herself. Oh hell, her headlights were on. Crap. She didn't do anything about it, however, just in case he, y'know, hadn't noticed. "Thanks," she said, looking back up at him. "I bet you do too." She was suddenly skin-prickly aware that they were in his room and the rest of the house was completely empty.

Thom had actually noticed, but he wasn't going to say anything - wouldn't know how to phrase it even if he wanted to. He was also being far too aware of where they were, and of what she was wearing and he let the silence drift between them as they stood on opposite sides of the room, before he finally spoke. "So - I guess I promised you hot chocolate..."

She didn't want things to go strange, so Leija decided she was agreeable to hot chocolate. Even though a big hunk of her would've liked to just tackle him onto the bed and ... she didn't know what. Straighten something out, let him know what was okay and what wasn't, something. She smiled a little instead. "It's not necessary to my continued survival, but if you want some too ... I'll always take anything with chocolate."

He chuckled a little at that and walked over to her. "So... you coming downstairs, or did you want to wait here and I'll be back..." he asked. He looked down at her, one hand resting on her arm. She still felt a little cold and he frowned, pulling her to him a little more and rubbing his hands up and down her arms to warm her up.

Oohh that ... felt really nice. And was probably a bad idea on his part, because the only thing she had on was his clothes, but she wasn't going to stop him or anything. Not on her life. She'd expected to have to come with him, but as he was giving her a choice ... "I'll wait up here," she answered, her hands automatically moving to his waist as he rubbed her arms.

He ghosted a smile and for now resisted the urge to kiss her before he pulled back. "I won't be long," he promised her, before disappearing out of the room and downstairs.

Leija leaned against the desk for a second and tried to let her heart slow down. She bit her lip as her eyes landed on that tantalizing little book. She glanced at the door and listened, then looked back at it. Should she? She probably shouldn't ... at all, but ... god, she was dying of curiosity. With one thumb, she opened the cover and took a peek at the first page.

Thom had never hurried through making hot chocolate so much in his entire life. Usually he liked to take his time over it, but somehow the thought of the girl in his room was really rather distracting. Unfortunately, there was only so quickly you could make the damn stuff, so it was a good five minutes later that his reappeared upstairs, a mug in each hand as he pushed the door open.

She hadn't wanted to risk actually picking it up, just in case he was one of those people who knew exactly where all the stuff in his room was down to the last centimeter. That, and after catching a couple of female names in her quick peeking thumb-through, she felt bad for snooping and stopped. Leija moved to stand at the window and looked around as he came in, a little smile on her face.

"Are you gonna be okay for getting home later?" he asked, crossing to stand at the window with her and handing her a drink. He looked out into the rain. "It doesn't look like it's gonna let up any time soon..." He took a sip of his chocolate, then stopped, deciding it was too hot as he put his down on his desk. "Hopefully the weather'll be better tomorrow..."

"Yeah, I can get dad to come and get me," she said, accepting the offered mug. She let it cool off for a little, looking out at the rain with him as it warmed her fingers. "So just let me know when you get sick of me," she added, flashing him a brief smile. "What's going on tomorrow?" Leija tried a sip. It was good. He knew how to make it right.

He stepped in behind her, slipping his arms around her waist. "I'll do that," he promised, though he figured that it'd be a while from now. "Oh, Isaac mentioned something about a get together out at Wetmore's Landing," he told her, then blinked and smiled a little. "Which you should totally come to - the girl that invited Isaac apparently said that anyone was welcome. He invited me - I'm inviting you."

Mm, that was nice. Leija leaned back into him comfortably. "You party animals," she accused lightly, smirking out at the rain. She took another sip. "What kind of a get-together is it? Are you guys playing again? ... or is that ridiculous question, considering the location that I've not heard of yet." She turned her head to look up at him out of the corner of her eye.

"No, we're not playing, though I'll probably take my acoustic anyway," he told her. "It's a beach party - come camp out thing. Likely to go on all night, people are taking tents and everything. As I understand it, it's just gonna be about a dozen or so of us, a bonfire, probably marshmallows, shit like that. Should be fun - not at all party-animal-eqsue. Does that disappoint you?" he asked, leaning forward to catch a glimpse of her face.

Which meant the obvious that he wasn't saying. They'd be spending the night somewhere together. Likely in a tent. That thought coiled right down to her stomach and stayed there. "No, quite the opposite, really," she answered in a mild tone, looking away and taking another sip of her hot chocolate. She was tempted to ask about sleeping arrangements, but that might be a bit too overeager. Or paranoid. Or something. "I'll see if I can go."

"Good," he told her, hugging her slightly more tightly for a moment. "I'd like it if you came." He hadn't actually given too much thought to sleeping arrangements, though the more he adjusted his mental idea of the party to include her in it, the more it started to become apparent. He'd been to this kind of thing before - and always ended up sharing a tent with Isaac. And now he had a girlfriend. Who was coming with him. And who possibly wouldn't know anyone else there. Was he putting her in a difficult position with this one? He really wasn't sure. Or whether to broach the subject, or leave it until tomorrow night. When it could just as easily be spectacularly awkward.

For her part, Leija wasn't going to ask until he did. 'Cause maybe there'd be a bunch of girls there too and he already just assumed that she'd sleep around them. Or maybe these things were always gender-separated. She didn't know any teenagers who'd actually follow that, but ... maybe there'd be adults or ... something. In any case, hey Thom, can I sleep with you? probably wasn't the best question to ask when he was right there behind her and she didn't have any underwear on. Well ... any of her own underwear. So she just smiled at the fact that he wanted her to come -- no, attend -- and sipped her hot chocolate.

He waited, to see if she'd say anything, growing slightly paranoid when she didn't. He leaned forward, brushing some of her hair to one side as he lightly kissed her neck where it met her shoulder. "You're very quiet," he murmured into her skin. He could smell the soap powder that lightly scented his t-shirt and the scent of her skin, a combination that was different and nice at the same time, making him not at all eager to move his head again.

Oh god. Leija's eyes slipped closed and her hand lowered the mug to the windowsill before she dropped it, because ... yeah. Even with just a little brush of contact, that felt like a place that his lips belonged forever and ever, amen. Her head tilted slightly to the side. "You just ..." she started in a murmur. " ... keep making me second guess everything ... to say." Not to mention when he did stuff like that, it was unspeakably distracting.

Thom nuzzled slightly against her neck, not kissing so much as feeling her skin against his face. "I do?" he asked her, his voice soft. "How's that then?" His own drink was well and truly forgotten on his desk now. He'd put it there whilst it cooled off slightly, but in the meantime he'd forgotten about it completely. Leija was a much better distraction.

"Yeah," she said in a very fuzzy, distant sort of way. She was engrossed in the feeling of smooth skin, then very slightly different-feeling skin -- because it wasn't quite rough, and her variety of adjectives was dwindling to an alarmingly small number -- where he must shave and then the light brush-tickle of his over-long hair on her neck. But still. Talking. Yes. That needed to be done, too. "Just don't want to say the wrong thing," she said. "Still new at all this."

"I have faith in your ability not to say the wrong thing," he told her, smiling into her neck. "That and you have an amazing amount of leeway and I'm a naturally forgiving type," he promised. "So, you don't have to second guess." Or avoid the subject, which he was currently guilty of himself. He should stop that. Really he should.

He drew back and rested his chin on her shoulder. "So, erm - tomorrow night. Did you want me to organise for you to share with one of the girls...." He trailed off, the 'or' left hanging, never mind the 'you could sleep in with me' bit. Because he wasn't sure how to say that - it wasn't like anything would happen, Thom knew that. It was too soon, and anyway, he didn't work like that. But she didn't know that and he didn't want to make her think... Whatever she might think if he asked her, so! Not quite asking questions!

Leija's hands settled on the arm he had wrapped around her and she chuckled softly. Good for him, he'd gotten to what had been really tempting to dance around. Her cheeks started to get a little bit pink, but she was getting to the point where that didn't bother her anymore. Not with him. "I think I'd be more comfortable with you," she answered quietly, a smile tugging at her lips. That was true, and a good excuse. She generally didn't get on with other girls, and ... really, quite honestly, she wanted to sleep with Thom. Sleep-sleep. She'd never slept cuddled up with anybody before, and it really seemed like it'd be a pleasant thing to do. She looked at his profile out of the corner of her eye. "If that's okay," she added, just in case.

He bit the corner of his lip slightly - and then immediately caught himself and let it go. That was a nervous gesture that he never did in front of anybody. He took a minute to answer though. Was this all going too fast? He'd hardly known this girl for a week and now he was facing sleeping with her. It all felt like a rollercoaster ride - exhilarating but kinda scary and out of his control. And whilst he didn't want it to stop, that didn't mean that he didn't have his screaming oh shit moments. It was strange, he knew - a moment ago he'd been chickening out of suggesting they sleep-sleep together tomorrow night, because of what she might think. And he'd been fairly calm about that. And yet, the moment she suggested it, he was suppressing inner-panic at the prospect. He guessed it was the difference between fantasy and reality.

He needed to speak, he realised. "Sure," he said, his voice coming out a touch hoarse. He cleared his throat. "Sure - sure, that's fine." Oh God - did that come out sounding like it wasn't? What with the silence before it and everything? Gah! Clarification. "Fine, great! I'd, like that."

It took him way too long to respond. And when he did, there were too many affirmatives in it. Leija was silent for a beat, considering. Taking into account his sudden omg-what-am-I-doing hesitation from when they'd been in her room, it didn't take a fucking rocket scientist to figure this out. "Thom," she said, her voice very steady now that she had a good direction to go in. She pulled at his arm to loosen it up enough to allow her to turn. She draped her own around his shoulders and looked him dead center in the eyes. They really needed to get this out in the air, it would probably save both of them some inner turmoil. "We don't have to do anything, ever that you don't want to do. Just like I'm not going to do anything that I don't want to do. Okay? I like you a whole truckload, this is ... is really good, the whole thing. I'm really happy with it. I'm also very, very attracted to you, but that doesn't mean that the second it's nighttime and we're horizontal that we're going to have sex. I'm not ready for it, you don't seem ready for it, and that's totally okay. That's good, really. I'd have to rethink some things if you were that quick on the draw, and I'd hope you'd question it too. I've never had anybody ever kiss me, even, and I'm totally fine with hanging out there for a while. So if you're not comfortable sharing a tent with me, just say so, it's fine, you won't hurt my feelings, promise." She smiled at him faintly, trying to gauge his expression.

Thom blushed beetroot, absolutely mortified for a moment that she'd been the one to give him that speech - it pricked at his 'guy'ness. But at the same time, but felt a huge wave of relief that couldn't be ignored and after the first rush of mortification had passed, he chuckled slightly and gave her a crooked smile. "So, you stopped second guessing what you were gonna say then?" he pointed out. He looked down, dropping his head slightly, before looking back up. "I didn't mean - I'm comfortable sharing a tent with you, but you're right - I'm not ready for anything more. This is... fast for me." He gestured between them. "This, us, what we have here - is way faster than I usually move. And I'm not complaining at all. This is also great. But... Yeah. I'm kinda..." No, he didn't have words to end that one. And he currently felt like a total idiot.

A total screaming virgin? her mind supplied in it's sardonic way. Not that she'd ever say that to him, of course. It wasn't derisive in the least; in fact, it made part of her like him even more. Leija's smile broadened and she rose up on her toes to lightly kiss one of his hot cheeks. Even though she knew how bad it sucked, he was absolutely adorable when he blushed. "About this, yes, I did. I have no basis of comparison, but it is fast," she agreed. Not that she wanted to backpedal at all, she was starting to really enjoy the stomach-butterflies. But she really didn't want him to be uncomfortable or ... feel like he had to give more than he wanted to be a man or something stupid like that. Guys were strange. "I like it here, we don't have to move from this point anytime soon." She nuzzled at his jaw.

He smiled, definitely looking happier now. "Good," he told her. "I like this point," he added, before leaning in to kiss her softly to prove it, before drawing back a little. "I just - don't want to rush things. And I want to get to know you better." Like, what the hell was that all about? The tears and the thing you can't tell me? I want you to be able to tell me.

Leija smiled at him and nodded. He wasn't exactly being defensive, but she kind of got the impression he didn't want her to think it was something wrong with her. Which she didn't, in the least. It was sweet. "Me too," she answered, sucking her lower lip into her mouth for a brief second. "So we will." And that was as simple as that, to her. She had a feeling -- which could've been totally off base, but it was a nice feeling anyway -- that eventually they'd progress on to other points, but for now she was glad that she'd plunged on ahead and laid things out with him.

Oh, the lip sucking thing was nice. And he couldn't resist following it up with a proper kiss, pulling her closer, his arms going around her as he did so."Good," he told her, drawing back from the kiss and just holding her. "Leija - about yesterday..." he said, tentatively, cautiously.

She held him back comfortably. She was pretty sure, outside of possible arm-cramps or something of the kind, that she could stand there all damn day like that. Her eyes opened a little wider as he started to ask something, however, and she felt her stomach drop a little. "Yeah?" she encouraged quietly.

Well, he'd broached the subject, there really wasn't any going back now. "I know you said you couldn't tell me, I know you said that I'd think you were crazy. But I won't, really. And I meant it when I said I wanted to get to know you better. I do - all of you. Even the potentially-crazy-inducing bits." He looked at her with an earnest intensity, awaiting her answer.

Leija looked back and had to work to keep herself from immediately bursting into tears. No, that look in his eyes wasn't fair. He was supposed to be letting that go and forgetting about it. Nevermind the glaring truth that it would be coming up again if they spent any substantial amount of time together. Which they already were. Her second -- besides crying -- impulse was to make something up to placate him. But that wouldn't work, she was a crappy liar. Leija bit her lip and just stared at him for what felt like a really long time. "Do you ... believe ... in more than ... normal, everyday things?" she asked in a low murmur, wanting to take it back halfway through it.

He reached up to stroke her hair, encouragingly, still holding her with his other arm. He hardly dared breathe, because this? Was more than he'd gotten yesterday. And he did want to know - and more than that, he wanted to be able to be there for her, to be someone she could come to. He knew it was his protector instincts kicking in, but he didn't give a damn about what the cause was - it was just who he was. And standing by and watching someone he cared about that upset? No, it hadn't been something he'd coped with particularly well. "Uh huh," he confirmed. "I do. There's more in the world than most people know about. I take it you know that too?" he asked, stating the obvious.

She hugged him tightly, heart pounding in her chest. As if somehow she could squish the curiosity out of him. What he said was only very marginally reassuring; most people believed in ghosts and shit like that. Easy stuff that movies and books told them existed. It wasn't like what she was was even remotely suspected by the population at large. But what could she do? She'd already started talking, and telling him no now would just push him away, wouldn't it? Leija squeezed her eyes closed and wished desperately that this wasn't happening. That whole talk they just had might've been for nothing. "I am one of those things," she whispered. Please don't go, please don't be afraid of me or run or lose your mind, because I like it, I really do, you should keep your sanity, it's good for you --

He expected as much. The 'crazy' had been the clincher, really. So her words didn't come as that much of a surprise - even if her actual wording as a little... Odd. He held her as she clung to him, resting his head against the top of hers, lightly. "Me too," he whispered. Because that was the truth - and even if he couldn't tell her about the protector thing, he could tell her about the magic. And that came under the heading of 'other stuff, weird and unbelievable'.

"What?" she said in disbelief before she could stop herself. Leija pulled back to look at him, genuinely shocked. Surely he didn't ... but -- what? She looked him over, then glanced around his room again. All seemingly normal ... Her hands spread across his back, feeling for ... something that she definitely would've noticed by then. She made herself stop. Angels weren't the only things out there, just because he was something didn't mean he was anything like her. "What do you mean?" she near-demanded, really trying not to freak out. What if he was a demon? What if he was a hunter who targeted valkyries? What if he was something bad? Which was ridiculous, but she really hadn't expected to hear that.

Thom was given serious pause by the look on her face, the tone of her voice. It was kinda intimidating - plus there was the fact that what he was obviously just about to tell her he'd told nobody. Not even Isaac - and he told Isaac everything. Well, except for the 'I'm a protector and doomed to look out for your sister for the rest of our lives'. But that had good reason. "Erm... I... I guess I mean I can do magic. Spells and things. Not a huge amount, right now, but I'm learning. Like the crystal I gave you the other day - it's imbued with a calming spell."

Oh. Oh. He was a ... a witch. Or something. That was very human and normal and not at all scary or threatening or anything. She could deal with that. Leija's shoulders slumped in visible relief. Even though she knew that now she had to tell him. She was tempted to make him ask her again, but that would just be prolonging the inevitable. It was just a question of how. It would be dramatic and ... well, effective to show him, but that might break his mind. And she definitely didn't want to do that. Leija looked off to one side, the lump in her throat huge already. She swallowed. "I'm ... I'm sort of ... like ... an angel." Which wasn't entirely accurate, but that was the closest point of reference he'd probably have.

Of all the things Thom possibly could have ever thought she would say - that? Wasn't even anywhere near the list. "An.. angel?" he asked, blinking slightly, though he didn't look like he doubted what she was saying. More pure shock than disbelief. He was sure there was more he should add to that, but he couldn't quite get past the 'I'm an angel' of it all.

She glanced at him, worrying her lower lip without any sort of mercy. "Sort of," she said. This was ... bad. In that it wasn't good at all and if she didn't do something to prove it, he'd really think she was a freak or insane or ... something. "I get ... called. I have to go and ... help people die. That was where I went at the party. I had to." Yes, she was sounding crazier by the second. "Here," she said, moving away from him and turning to put her back to him. She reached back and pulled the back of the borrowed t-shirt up to expose her bare back. Her shoulders twitched a little in the whole Not Want of it all. She gave him another glance, aware it might be the last time she really saw him before everything fell apart. "Don't be scared, okay?" she said.

Die - you help people die!?! His brain screamed at her, but he still couldn't really make his mouth work as he watched as she turned round and pulled up her - his - t-shirt, aware of the fact that he probably looked entirely freaked right now, despite all of his earlier assurances. He met her eyes as she looked at him and held them for a moment, catching his bottom lip between his teeth and worrying at it - not even thinking about his 'not in front of other people' rule for that right now. He nodded to her words, even though just her saying that made his heart race with apprehension.

He already looked scared, and that made her want to do this even less, but things would be worse if she didn't tell him what she really meant. "They need it, somebody has to be there when they're hurt and dying, it helps them, I can make them not think about it anymore and try to pass over more peacefully and I hate it, but it's good sometimes, they need it, and it has to be done," she rambled in a desperate sort of way. "I'm not dangerous, I promise." God, she was already making this a complete disaster. Squeezing her eyes closed and facing forward again, she forced her wings out. She knew from experience with her dad that he wouldn't be able to see them, which was maybe a blessing. She could, in her peripheral vision as they stretched out and fluttered just a bit. She knew that if she had no idea about any of this, the fire might be scary. The effects would be there, however, the faint breeze that they always gave off. The muscles in her back moved as she pushed with them enough to get her off of the carpet. At least his room was big.

Her words penetrated his brain - and actually brought him back from the edge of terrified panic that 'I help people die' had sent him to. He made himself listen, taking ahold of himself with the iron will and determination which his mother had instilled in him since before he could remember. He'd been raised to be able to deal with anything that life threw him without breaking a sweat - his mother had been preparing him to handle anything since even before she could begin thinking of telling him why. But she hadn't prepared him for angels. And she hadn't prepared him for his girlfriend revealing the scars on her back and telling him that it was okay. He watched, uncomprehending, until she seemed to jump, or something - and then she was hovering above the floor and there were...

He backed away, involuntarily, knocking some papers off his desk with one hand as he flailed back - because fucking hell she had wings. Wings of fire. He fell back over his feet and landed hard on the floor in the midst of a floating pile of papers, blown around a little by her wings. He sat there, wide eyed - and suddenly a little crystal with some calming spell really didn't seem like that much... Hell, the entire truth - even if he could tell her without dying - seemed like nothing right now, as his girlfriend hovered in the middle of his bedroom on wings of flame.

She didn't do it for long, because the ceiling really wasn't all that tall when you had the wingspan that she did. It was just enough to show him that she wasn't a complete loon. Leija dropped back to the floor, and pulled them back into her back as quickly as she could. She turned, letting the shirt drop back down, and took in his shell-shocked expression. Bet you wish you hadn't asked now, huh? part of her mind asked cynically. The rest of her was worried as all hell, and she went to kneel next to him, reaching out for him automatically. "I'm sorry," she was repeating, though she wasn't sure why.

He let her reach for him, in fact, when she did, he reached for her as well, a hand going out to touch her skin, as if checking she was real. And then he was on his knees, on her level as he put his arms around her, drawing her in, but also feeling her back, as though he expected there still to be something there. Which, to be fair, he did - even though he'd held her countless times over the past few days, Even though they'd just spent the best part of an hour with her resting against his chest. There was nothing there, of course, and he paused for a moment, before burying his face in her shoulder again, just as he had earlier, except this time, he held her more tightly and the move was totally for his own comfort. "Don't be sorry, there's... No sorry," he mumbled, eventually, without lifting his head at all. Angel - Angel. ... Angel His brain couldn't quite move past that right now.

That was far better than her all-encompassing fear that he'd push her away and tell her to get out, so Leija wrapped her arms around his shoulders and held him back just as tightly. Her fingers threaded into the hair at the base of his skull and stayed there. He could cling all he wanted, she couldn't blame him. She wanted to cling too, after all. She was pretty sure that her talking some more would screw things up, so she took a few deep breaths to try and calm herself down and let him have as much time as he needed or wanted or ... yeah. She leaned her head against his and held on.

The clinging was needed for a while as Thom reassured himself that she was still the person he knew. Having her there, holding him, really helped in that regard and he wasn't going to question it. Nothing his mother had told him about the world had prepared him for this. Nothing at all.

Eventually, he drew back a little, his hand going to cup her cheek as he looked at her. "You hate it?" he asked her, his brain finally giving him that, out of everything he'd just experienced.

She looked back, eyes ticking between his dark ones, subconsciously looking for any sort of disgust or fear or ... "I never know them," she said, eyes leaking just a little bit. She knew that wouldn't help, but she couldn't help herself. She'd never done this before with anyone, and she felt so ... guilty that she wasn't normal for him. Not easy to deal with. "They're always strangers, but I see them suffer so much and even though I think I help most of the time, just ... just the things ... the other night when I left the party, that girl wasn't more than seven years old, Thom."

Oh god. "That's what upset you yesterday," he surmised, feeling like someone had just punched him in the stomach. "Oh god, Leija - I'm so sorry," he said, already imagining what that must be like, his heart going out to her. He clutched at her, pulling at his t-shirt that she was wearing to pull her back in to his arms, not at all graceful or cautious, just a messy, gangly pull as he twisted round, just to get as close to her as he could.

She went with it -- not that she had any impulse at all not to -- and let out a soft sound. It was her turn to plant her face into his shoulder, and she did so as she went back to clinging to him. It was natural to want to assure him that it was okay, he didn't have to be sorry, she did it nearly every day, it wasn't a big deal, but oh god it was a big deal. It was always a big deal, every spark of life that she watched leaving someone's eyes. The not-knowing whether she helped or not, whether they were really going to a better place or just snuffing out. It was the biggest deal, and there wasn't any reassurance for it. "Are you okay?" she asked his chest, hands fisting in his shirt. "I know it's ... a lot."

"I'll be fine," he reassured her, already his instinct to put someone else before himself taking ahold. "Don't you worry about me. It was just... a surprise, that's all. I didn't.. I didn't know."

"I know," Leija murmured. She shifted a little, enough to press a kiss to his neck. She wasn't sure what else to say, it really was a lot to dump on a person, she felt sure. She knew that she'd been shocked, and it was in her blood. It was who she was, who her mother had been. Leija -- probably wisely -- decided to save that story for much, much later. What had happened to her mother.

He was back to clinging now, he couldn't help it as he drew her in to him. He held her there, not speaking, for a minute, before he let her go - mostly, anyhow. He took hold of both of her hands and stood, pulling her up with him, leading her mutely over to the bed. He sat, pulling the covers back as he did so, looking up at her, hoping she'd join him without him having to ask. Words still weren't being his forte right now.

She did, without question, sitting down next to him and rubbing both thumbs over his hands. She was chewing mercilessly on her lower lip, really trying not to blabber at him like she wanted to. Now that he knew, she wanted to tell him so much, try to explain it, try to make it somehow not so awful. But there weren't any words for that, so she just sat and looked at his face with worry very apparent in her eyes. She got one hand free to reach up and brush the hair off of his forehead, needing to pet him somehow.

"C'm'here," he muttered, pulling her down onto the bed, so that they were lying and he could hold her properly, pulling her close to him, his arms around her. He didn't make any move to kiss her - at the moment, he didn't feel ready for that, but somehow he knew, he just felt the need to hold her. And all the while, he watched her, watched her face, watched the worry written there, the way she was chewing on her lip. He wanted to tell her it was okay, but he couldn't. He wanted it to be okay, he really, really did. And he hoped it would be. But right now, he didn't know what to think and he wouldn't lie to her.

And so, for now, he just held her, the random realisation appearing in his brain that an hour ago, this, lying here like this, would have scared the hell out of him. But the combination of their earlier talk and her revelation cut through all of that, made it not even a subject any more. He reached a hand to her back, stroking above the t-shirt over where he'd seen the scars earlier, over where those fiery wings had come from. He couldn't feel anything. "Can I...?" He left the question hanging as he reached down, slipping a hand slightly under the back of the t-shirt, making a small 'I wanna move up' gesture, the question written on his face as he waited for her permission.

If he'd tried to kiss her with that look on his face, Leija was pretty sure she couldn't have done it. So she was grateful he didn't, just settling in on her side next to him. She just slipped an arm around him, and continued to watch him avidly back, not quite sure what she was watching for. Reassurance, signs that he looked like he was really cracking up, rejection, anything she could read. Her shoulders automatically tensed the second he touched her back, even over cloth. She made herself relax, because he'd done it countless times already in the past week or so, there was no reason for her to be weirded out by it now. She'd always known, after all. His touch was just purposeful this time, searching. The muscle-loosening only lasted another second until his fingers brushed her bare skin. Funny how not that long ago she'd determined that he wouldn't get to see those scars if she could help it because they were ugly and she had no excuse for them. Her eyes burned into his for a few seconds before she nodded and tucked her face into his chest. Thom wouldn't hurt her, she trusted Thom. If she didn't, they wouldn't be there right then. And she knew that she'd be dying of curiosity if their positions were reversed.

He slipped his hand further up under the t-shirt, rucking it up slightly at the back. Her skin was soft and warm - and this was not at all how he'd envisioned the first time he'd touch her like this. He'd imagined this being with a totally different purpose entirely. But now? Now he had to know.

His touch was slow, soft, tentative as he felt his way up her back. It stilled entirely as he felt the first scar, then he began a silent exploration of the scar's length, running his fingers over the surface, before moving to it's twin. He looked down slightly to where she had her head buried in his chest. "Does it - do they hurt?" he asked, his voice soft, tinged with worry.

She wasn't stupid in the least, so she knew the question was coming eventually. The fact that it was really his first question was somewhat comforting. Leija turned her face a little so he'd be able to understand her, and spoke just as softly. "No," she answered, every tiny nerve in her back tingling with awareness of his hand. "The first time, they did. They weren't there before that -- the scars. But after that ..." She trailed off and shook her head just slightly, the hand at the back of his ribs curling up to cling to his shirt again.

"Do they burn?" he asked, finding his voice again now. His hand stopped exploring and just rested on her back between her shoulder blades. "The fire..." That had been part of the shock - wings of fire. No cute, white, fluffy things. Fire. He didn't recall there being any heat radiating from them - but he knew that he'd been panicking at the time, that his memory couldn't be wholly trusted. He was calming down now, his heart beat slowing from the gallop it'd been running at, his breathing normal again. No, now he just had a million and one questions and a head full of confusion to sort out.

"They don't burn. They're not ... real fire, I don't think. There's no heat, just some wind. They stay the shape they're supposed to be, they catch the air like real wings ... I've never caught anything on fire with them ... otherwise I probably wouldn't have any hair ... You can touch them, Daddy has ..." She turned her face up to look at him, reddish eyebrows drawn close together. She bit her lip before taking a breath, because she really really had to get something out before she lost all of her nerve. "Thom," she started, voice very soft, but fast. "I know this is a lot. Like ... the world, a lot. And I'm still me, but I'm me with this, because I can't help it, it's who I am, and I'd stop if I could, but it's really not a choice. But I know it's -- would be -- is a lot to deal with for you and we just got started and I know you didn't sign up for this and you don't have to answer right away, I'm not trying to overwhelm you, but if you feel like ... like maybe you don't want ... me. Anymore. I'd understand. ... I just want you to know that." Though her gaze literally begged for him to say that he didn't Not Want. She could help it.

He considered this - because no matter what, he couldn't stop being Thom and Thom thought things through. It was just who he was. "No," he said, softly, after a moment. He caught her gaze and pulled his hand away from her back, reaching to stroke the back of it softly down her face, as though he could wipe that look off it. "I'm not going to pretend this isn't a shock, or that I'm not gonna take a while to properly understand it. I'm probably gonna be bugging you with questions, but... This is who you are. And I wanted to know that. And now that I know? I wouldn't take it back. Given the choice, I wouldn't not know again. And I don't want to stop seeing you." Oh god, his girlfriend was a angel. Literally.

A thought-out answer was the best kind of answer he could give. Leija might not've believed him otherwise, because, well ... people said things off-the-cuff that they didn't mean. He sounded like he meant that. Her eyes closed while he touched her face, but slid open again a moment after. She wanted to keep his gaze, it felt important. "I can handle questions," she said quietly. "I can't guarantee that I know all the answers, though. There hasn't really been ... anyone ... to guide me through all this, there's a lot that I don't know the Hows or Whys of." Though they couldn't get much closer, she shifted in just a little bit. She wanted to tell him that she didn't forget that he'd confessed -- even though that felt like the wrong word -- to her too, and she was interested in what he could do, but she wasn't sure how. She had questions of her own, but he looked pretty focused. "I want to know you too," she murmured, staring into his eyes.

His heart dropped at her final words, whilst at the same time doing a strange leap-y fall-y thing. Because he did want her to know him, but he knew there were limits on that. And she'd just told him this huge thing and he couldn't reciprocate. The sudden rush of guilt was a sharp stab as his heart hit bottom and for a moment, he couldn't maintain eye contact, his gaze flickering away, before returning to her face. God, what the hell did he say to that? 'I'll tell you what I can?' Which would be the truth, but sounded so... Not enough. But he didn't want to give her some bullshit answer either. "I know," he said, finally, the expression in his eyes stating that he knew this wasn't enough, as much as he tried to hide that.

It was hard to miss things like that when your faces were only like ... ten centimeters away from each other. He'd been raptly staring at her up until that point. There's still something he's not telling me. She was sure of it. Which was ... confusing, to say the least. She was silent for a good long while as the gears turned in her head. 'I know.' What in the flying bloody hell did that mean? After something like this, did he not trust her? There was an impulse in her to push and get halfway mad and demand to know what he meant by that, but she reigned it in and controlled it. It was good to know she could still do that around him, because she wasn't at all oblivious to the fact that he'd just gotten his reality punched in the face. And he didn't need her paranoia at the moment, she was sure. But she couldn't not say anything. "That's not ... terribly reassuring, but okay," she said, giving him a wry half-smile.

I'm sorry. The thought was echoed in the look on his face as he realised that he was going to have to become a better liar than this. But he didn't want to lie to her. It didn't feel right. "I'd like... I'd like you to know me better than anyone," he offered her, quietly, his tone serious. That he could give her, the truth and as much as he could give anyone. It was all he had.

That thrilled the girliest part of her. To think that maybe she was wanted like that, as a Closest Person. Her eyes ticked between his, trying to read what was there. "But there's things you can't tell me," she stated just as quietly. It wasn't exactly a question. That was the only thing she could really conclude. Not that she sounded upset about it, that was kept under wraps.

"I'm sorry," he told her, a confirmation as much as one was needed. "If I could..." He looked down, unable to maintain eye contact. "There's a difference between can't and can't. I probably shouldn't even be telling you that much," he told her, wondering where the line was - was he just about to drop dead? He really didn't think so - it'd been explained to him that he couldn't talk about being a protector. He couldn't tell anyone what he was and he couldn't tell anyone who his protected was, or explain his motivations for protecting them. He thought that possibly he could get away with telling someone he was cursed, as long as he didn't say what the curse was, but at the moment, he wasn't even willing to risk going that far.

She didn't quite understand those implications, but his face was telling her enough for the moment. Really, if she'd been smarter, she should've taken the same path. But what was done was done and he hadn't completely freaked out or sent her away or anything of the kind. Leija knew there were more things under heaven than most people could dream, and tons of it she had no idea about. So she wasn't going to put the thumbscrews to him. Especially not today. She leaned in to lightly brush her cheek against his. "You can trust me," she whispered low. "But if you can't, you can't. I'll actually listen to you if you tell me not to ask," she added, sounding the tiniest bit amused.

He pulled away a little, so that he could actually look her in the eyes again. "Leija, believe me, this has nothing to do with whether I trust you or not. Okay? Nothing at all - I trust you. We wouldn't be here right now if I didn't. But, yes, I'm asking you not to ask." She may have looked amused - Thom looked deadly serious.

That sobered her up immediately. He was a serious sort of person to begin with, and that sort of intensity was a teeny bit unsettling. "Okay," she said quietly. She had no choice but to believe him. And, most likely, if she wanted to keep that trust, listening and not asking would be the best plan.

Well, one thing at least, the 'you're a complete shit Thom Harkin' feeling that telling her that left him with really doused the flames of the panic that had been lingering from her reveal. Nothing like coming across as a bastard to do that to a guy. He closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them and reached for her, drawing her into his arms and kissing her on the forehead. "Will you stay for a while?" he asked her. This had all been so intense, he wasn't sure that he could keep it up for much longer, but he didn't want her to leave either.

After tugging her -- his -- shirt down again in the back, the arm that wasn't tucked under her slid around him again. She was all for cuddling. Needed it, really, after the hour they'd just had. Could it really only have been that long? Funny how so much could get turned on it's ass so fast. It was scary and exciting all at the same time. He knew. He really knew, and that meant she didn't have to hide from him or lie or try to make up excuses or be so alone in everything. It made her cling. "Yes," she said emphatically, leaving off the standard 'if you want me to' bullshit. She needed to stay. Maybe if they were still for long enough, things would settle into some sort of place.