Worries

Who: Dean and Lullaby
Where: The house
When: Around midday

Lullaby was finishing looking at her email, which of course didn't actually have much in it. Just emails from Andy, really, and she wasn't up for emailing him back. Mostly because he was doing what he usually did when he contacted her in any capacity--he was flirting shamelessly, being overly suggestive, and generally making her feel like she wanted to send him an email back with huge blinking letters that read: 'Andy. Please Back The Fuck Off. KThxBai'. So, she just kinda ignored them for now, looked over her homework for her classes, swiftly decided she didn't have the brain for it, and shut her laptop down. After that she moved Dean's computer chair over towards the window, and was sitting on it, partially curled up, eyes out on the treeline. The view from the other bedroom was better, but she didn't mind so much. Her mind was just gently drifting over everything. Like how doing her assignments seemed so...distant in light of what had happened.

And she was wondering how Dean was going to go back to school and his normal life after he'd killed someone. That was pretty heavy on her thoughts as she watched birds flitting between branches, and squirrels running up and down the trees. She had some music playing on Dean's computer, but only had it up loud enough that she could hear the bass. She didn't even know what it was, just whatever he happened to have on there. She just needed something that broke up the silence while she was milling over everything that had happened since they'd left for the Masquerade.

Dean had left Sophie downstairs in the living room as he headed back to his room, looking for Thia. He was quiet as he headed into the room and he walked over, stopping a few feet behind her for a moment as he realised that he'd been just about to simply walk up and put his arms around her. After the last few days when they'd needed each other for that support and comfort it seemed natural, but this wasn't the last few days, was it? They'd been healed, she was sitting up, he was walking around - sure, he was still tired, but that would pass in a few days, apparently. But didn't it put a different light on things? He started forward again, walking to the side of her and resting against the window ledge instead. "So, Sophie's going to see about getting me a flight back to England for a bit," he told her.

When she caught the movement of him, she looked up, focusing her attention up on him immediately. She followed what he had to say, and had automatically been reaching out for his hand. And unlike him, she didn't manage to curb the influence before she wondered if it was weird or not. That came about two seconds afterwards. So she just kind of gave it a little squeeze, then let go again. "Do you know when your flight is?" she asked. She was also kind of wondering about herself. If she was going--which when they'd talked about it before he was pretty firm on. But there was always the possibility he'd changed his mind. Or she wouldn't be allowed. Something.

Dean shook his head. "No - kinda as soon as possible, but she said that it probably wouldn't be a for a day or so. Which is fine - I have a few things I need to get done before we go. Y'know, see Caleb - apologise to Rose. Talk to that bloke from the club the other night. And I wouldn't mind checking in with Isaac either. How about you?" he asked, wondering if she had anything she wanted to get done before they left.

"You mean things to do before leaving?" she asked. She paused, biting her lip a touch as she looked up at him. "Are you sure I'm allowed to go?" she asked. Because that was kinda important and everything. "There're probably a few um. Issues to figure out on that score..." she started. A few. Yeah. Like the fact that according to popular belief and say, truth, she was dead. His parents knew that. And while she was happy about her new ID and everything--she didn't exactly want to test it out on airport security. Which meant if she was going, it would need to be through a mirror. Which was a scary sort of thought, not that she wouldn't do it. She would. But still.

"I have to phone mum this afternoon, but either you're coming with me-" He took a breath, making his decision as he spoke. "-or I'm not going." He'd thought long and hard about that one. It was going to be difficult, making his parents understand. He'd protect them from the truth about the world as much as possible, but some things were unavoidable. Like the fact that his mum and dad knew that Thia was dead. Stupidly, he'd told them. He hadn't told any of his friends, but he'd told them. Which meant he had some explaining to do. Then again, they knew Oz was a werewolf, so at least he wasn't entirely starting from scratch in the 'there are other things in the world'. But werewolves didn't die and come back to life, did they?

Lullaby didn't necessarily look terribly happy when he said that he wouldn't go if she didn't. She knew he wanted to go home--he had insanely good reasons for that. He needed to, in her opinion. So she really didn't like the idea that she might hold him back from that, if people, say, kinda freaked out over the fact that he wanted to have a previously corpsified friend tag along with. "I don't like the idea of you not going because of me." she told him, not able to not be honest on that score. "I know you want to go home. I think you need the break from...well. Everything here for a while. It's been crazy, you need the rest. I want to go with you too." She gave him a little half smile. "I don't really like the idea of being in a different country than you are. I know we're all better and everything, but that doesn't mean that I've kicked off on my whole wanting to take care of you thing. That's still there, so I'm afraid you'll need to get used to it. But I really don't want to be responsible for you not heading home when you need to, cuz of...complications."

"My parents will be fine," Dean assured her - sounding rather more confident than he actually was. But he'd make it fine - he was determined about that. "They won't be a complication, I promise. And nobody else over there knows."

She watched his eyes for a few long moments as she debated with herself. "Okay." she said. She figured either it would be okay or it wouldn't--her worrying about it wouldn't change anything, and he seemed to kind of have that look to his eyes that told her when he'd Decided Something. "We thinking the best way for me to get there is through the mirror?" she asked. Which again, settled a thread of fear through her, but there was nothing for that.

"I think so," Dean told her, gripping the sill slightly harder as he stepped on the urge to reach for her. "We don't actually know how good that ID is," he pointed out. He didn't really want to test it if they could avoid it, even if the pack had included a passport.

She made a light face and nodded. "I don't really want to deal with scary men who want to put handcuffs on me." she said. "So let's not. I'll just...do that. you can take the mirror with you, and call me after you've talked to your parents?" she suggested. Then she gave him a little half smile. "And maybe be prepared to either summon me in a graveyard, or for me to need to snuggle you for a while if it kicks my ass energy-wise?" She'd prefer the snuggling option, really, but she recalled that she'd been out for a few hours after she'd been in the Inbetween for longer than she'd thought before. So, she didn't know what to expect. In theory, she would be in there less time, but she was kind of hopping an ocean, she didn't know if that would make a huge difference or what. Ahh figuring out weird abilities. It was less fun than one might assume.

"I haven't got the first clue where the nearest graveyard is," he admitted. "But probably not in walking distance." Which meant that they'd have to go for the snuggling option. Which he didn't have a problem with, not at all. He'd just summon her to his bedroom and.... And that was the other thing, he realised. His parent's house wasn't huge. Three bedrooms, which meant with Scott at his mum and dad, they didn't have a spare room. There'd have to be sharing going on. Either him and Thia, or him and Scott. God, he was going to have to share a room with his little brother! Because he couldn't see his mum letting him share with a girl, even if he assured them that they were just friends.

She smiled at him. "Oh good, snuggling is way cooler than graveyard dwelling." she told him, letting a little of her genuinely happy at the thought frame of mind shine through. "And I'm a geek, but I feel all silly about being summoned. Like I'm one of those protector-thingies from the Final Fantasy games." she said. "Sadly, I'm not nearly as bad-ass. I'll have to work on that. Y'know, come up with a mildly intimidating glare or something. ...of course this would all have to be after the snuggling-recharge bit, if I need it."

"Well, considering what you'd be facing would be my parents and my little brother, I think you might be best leaving the glare in its box and maybe trying a smile and being friendly. You're good at those anyway. You'd soon win them over," Dean told her, giving her a tiny smile. Maybe it would be easier just to bring her home, get his parents to meet her, love her and then tell them she'd died and been resurrected....

She giggled a tiny bit. "Okay, yeah, you're right. I'm good at smiling and being friendly, I won't try to glare at anyone." Except maybe Andy, if he can't learn to knock things the fuck off. That was a worry. She was actively concerned, now that they were going to be heading there for sure. "I'll be my usual charming self. Or, hopefully I'm charming. I'm told I'm sweet." she added helpfully. Really it was to cover the fact that the idea of meeting his family made her terribly nervous. In a huge way. But she didn't really want him knowing it did that to her. Because it was kind of lame, wasn't it? At least on some levels...of course on others it was perfectly legitimate and even likely that she'd have reason to be nervous.

"You're charming. And sweet." And a whole host of other things I can't say, he thought to himself - parroting back what she'd said, confirming it, that was one thing. It would probably be weird and over the top to add more besides. "I'm going to tell mum today that I'm bringing someone home with me," he told her. He wasn't entirely sure when he was going to broach the 'fade' subject.

She watched him for a moment. "Someone...not who?" she asked. Just so she knew what the plan was. "And are you gonna mention that I'm going to be coming in a weird magicky sort of manner that doesn't involve getting off of the plane with you?" she asked. "They know what happened to me...seems kinda strange to go for an elaborate scheme of having me show up in the terminal or something. I mean, it'd be great for movie hijinks and all, but I think we should stick to less flashy and possibly publicly noticeable antics." she said, kidding with the last bit. But she had just kind of caught how he'd phrased that. She didn't like the idea of being this weird bomb dropped on his parents either. Like a 'surprise! Here's that dead best friend I mentioned before!' thing.

Dean looked slightly distressed at that. "I... I don't know. I - I haven't really... I... I don't know. It seems, well, I... I... I don't know how they'd take this kind of thing over the phone and I was just going to kind of play it by ear, I guess and I really - I don't know," he told her.

She looked up at him then stood up, stepped in front of him, and gave him a hug as she hooked her arms up around his neck. "It's okay." she told him, since he was doing a whole lot of stammering there. "We'll figure something out. What I don't want to do is kinda...show up and make them deal with it in kinda...y'know, like a 'here, now deal!' sort of way. I don't..." she looked troubled for a second. "I don't want to scare anyone." What with her having already done that with an ex classmate and everything the other night. "And I especially don't wanna do it in their own house, and make them feel like...like I dunno, they're unsafe?" she suggested, wondering how to word everything. "Maybe...go, and go home with them and try explaining then? And after call me to come? If it's all okay?" Because she was still distinctly aware of the possibility that it may not be.

Dean slid his arms around her waist and looked down at her. "It'll all be fine," he told her, still not sure how he was going to broach this. Maybe it would be best to just leave it all until he got home. Be easiest. He'd been thinking of giving his parents a headsup about guests, but he hadn't considered the arrival aspect of things.

She gave him what was meant to be a reassuring smile, though she wasn't sure how well it came out. "I'm sure it will be." she told him. Which she wasn't. Her fears were still very much in the pit of her stomach, but she didn't want to add more stress for him. She'd rather at least try to think positively, and maybe it would work out. She trusted him. She just really wanted to avoid certain things. Like scaring people. She really wanted that to not be involved when she met his family.

He reached up and brushed a short lock of hair away from her face and for the first time since everything had happened allowed himself to think about the masque and everything before the nightmare and for a moment he just looked at her, those thoughts there, just below the surface, before he pulled back, letting her go, not willing to go there right now, there was too much else to deal with, they didn't need any kind of complications right now.

For a second, Lullaby was kind of just looking back at him, thoughts not necessarily on the events before the whole her father showing up and the subsequent gunshot that went and altered lives and everything, but the emotions that she'd been feeling before it all went down. And for a second, she was kind of wrapped up in it, or at least edging that way. Then of course, he reminded her that he didn't at all have any sorts of feelings like that towards her and she was an idiot, by doing what was normal, and pulling back. So that caused her to hop back herself, removing herself from his person. Which--she should watch herself more. She probably shouldn't do what she'd just done, the arms up around his neck thing. It just felt natural to her. She did it without thinking about it. It had her fidgeting for a second, and she righted the ring on her finger. Then she looked around the room for a moment, casting about for something to say. Which was way more difficult than she would have thought. "Um...there should probably be packing going on for you, right?" she latched onto lamely. "Want me to get you a suitcase?" she asked. "And thinking about that, if there's anything else you wanted that you didn't think of or couldn't take on the plane I could take it with me when I come through the mirror because everything on me comes with me and stuff so that would be really easy for things, right?" she added in a bit of ramble, but thankfully she caught it before it got too bad.

Dean reached up and ran his hand through his hair, still getting used to the shortness. He should really go get a shower sometime. He was all kinds of icky, but he didn't want to walk away just now. "Yeah, erm - I guess packing would be a plan," he agreed, leaning back against the windowsill again.

"Right." she agreed. "...I'll go find you luggage then." she added. At least for herself, there wasn't that much to pack. She had more clothes now than she had before, but still. Not whole scads or anything. She headed back towards the door. Sophie and Oz had had a lot. So he could use something of theirs.

He watched her go, not making any move to stop her. It was a sensible idea, after all. Reasonable, sensible, all of that stuff. He should pack, he didn't know when he was leaving, so he should get ready to go. He pushed off the sill as she disappeared, going to his drawers and starting to take things out. He didn't know how long they'd be gone for. He didn't know how much he'd need to take.

*~*~*

After Lullaby had gotten done texting with Joshua, she was in a much worse mood than she'd been in that morning. She'd curled up on the bed, even, sort of tried to nap, even though she figured she'd have to talk to Dean when he came back from showering and everything. Her mind was a little all over the place in regards to her conversation. It was...sort of hard to land on any conclusions or emotions.

She just knew that basically she felt like crap. Fabulous.

Dean, on the other hand, felt a little better after his shower. He'd taken clothes into the bathroom, since he knew that Thia was hanging around his room fussing over packing things. Or, at least, she had been when he'd left, so when he walked back in and saw her balled up on his bed, he was a little surprised - but then again, it'd been a long day, maybe she was just tired. He headed over and sat down by her, putting a hand on her back, enough to get her attention if she was awake, but hopefully not to wake her up if she was sleeping.

It got her attention, and she looked back over her shoulder at him. She gave him a light little ghost of a smile that didn't last, then reached up to try and tug him down, because she wanted a hug. Or, possibly, she just needed one, and Dean-hugs were ones she was good for. That might help her feel at least a little better. She'd take anything at that point.

He went, because he could never say no to her for things like that as he lay down and slipped his arms around her, snuggling up to her back. "You tired?" he asked her, voice by her ear so that she could definitely hear him. He wondered if that's what it was, but then again, there'd been that not-really-a-smile.

She shook her head. "No." she said. She settled back against him, curling up a little more into a ball, only a comfortably snuggled back against Dean ball. "I texted Joshua. He was kind of not okay the other night before the masque, and I was checking up on him." she continued. "I don't know. I need to quit feeling blindsided by things, I think." she told him, thinking that was so much easier said than done.

"Blindsided?" he asked, reaching up to shift the pillows a little, before returning to holding her, knowing he probably shouldn't be so comfortable like this, but she needed him right now, so it was allowed.

"Yeah. Like, it happened when he randomly asked me out again, and now it feels like it again, only with different things, and I don't know. Things got weird and he was telling me about him being...I don't know. I don't remember exactly--no. Pathetic and worthless I think was what he said. Damaged or whatever, and he threw in there this question about how like, between us it wasn't all bad, or..." she broke off and sighed, letting her eyes slip shut. "I don't know."

"I don't think breakups are meant to be easy," Dean said, wishing that he had a little more experience to draw off of with this. He wanted to be able to help, to be able to say something constructive, but his one and only 'relationship' had lasted a whole two days and his 'ex-girlfriend', if she could be called that had been trying to spread rumour after rumour about him ever since. Other than that, there were only his friends to draw off - Andy, his best friend back in England, had been a man-whore of epic proportions and the rest of them, well, Dean hadn't really paid that close attention. They occasionally had girlfriends, then they didn't - emotional shit wasn't high on the list of conversation topics for a group of guys. But now that his best friend was female, Dean knew he'd had a mind-shift about certain things. He wanted her to be happy, he wanted to be there for her. Which meant dealing with the 'emotional shit' - something which he didn't mind as much as he would have thought.

"I know." Lullaby said. "Just...I don't know? He's got himself a new girlfriend. Though for some reason decided to correct me and tell me it was just 'dating' or something. Which...that's kinda what you do with a girlfriend, right? And then he asked me if I was okay with it." she said, that bit still baffling her a touch. "...why would he ask something like that? And what am I meant to say to it?" she asked, glancing back over her shoulder towards Dean, but not fully turning because she was comfortable like she was.

"He obviously still likes you. I dunno - maybe he was hoping you wouldn't be alright with it. Like you'd be jealous, or suddenly have a thing that you wanted him back or something," Dean mused - he'd seen Andy play that card a few times with girls. It worked as well - or, it had for Andy anyway, though he didn't in any way put Joshua in the same box as Andy. That would be unfair to Joshua. "And the dating thing - it's like I was trying to say with Janice. Just, like... 'Girlfriend' is serious, y'know? It's, like... An on-going thing. There's a kind of, well, I dunno - permenance to it. 'Dating' is more casual, I guess. Like 'this is fun, but dunno if we'd do it again' type thing? At least, that's how I see it. And, like - I know that Andy always said that 'dating' meant you weren't exclusive or anything," Dean added, though he sounded less sure that he bought that part.

Lullaby had a hard time believing Andy was ever 'exclusive' but that was her opinion. And likely an unfair one. She did listen though, and nodded. "That makes sense." she said. Then sighed. "So I was meant to be jealous?" That...she wasn't, really. "I just want the guy to be happy. And I dunno, he said stuff, and he seems like he's not, and I still feel like that's my fault." she admitted. "He said he'd talk to Claire about Gabe, too." she added, deciding that subject was necessary to talk about too, and she could do that better because at least it wasn't weird emotional messes. "I guess she knows him or something. I'm still really afraid of that whole thing though. He said he didn't think Gabe seemed dangerous...but that's not what I'm worried about."

"No, I'm not worried about Gabe being dangerous either," Dean told her. If he'd been worried about that, the conversation the other night would have gone very differently - a thought which sent a small shudder through him as he wondered what the hell he meant like that. After all, his definition of what he was capable of had really widened lately. But, now wasn't the time to be worrying about himself, so he pushed that away and concentrated on her. "I'm worried about him being afraid. I'll call him this afternoon," he promised her. "I'll talk with him - never mind Claire. I'll handle this," he promised. "And it's not your fault if Joshua's not happy. You're not responsible for that."

She frowned a touch, and this time she did shift back a little more so she could look back at him. "You okay?" she asked. She would have gone into the fact that she was afraid of what fear could do, really. Him running around telling people--it wasn't like he had any lingering loyalty to her. He barely knew her when she'd been alive. She did have to admit she felt a little better when he told her he'd handle it, though. Even if there was another part of her that was thinking of telling him he took on too much already, and hadn't he had enough of handling things that had to do with her in the past few days? But she couldn't actually bring herself to say that. There was no way to put that where it would come out anything but twitch-worthy.

And this was why he liked talking to her in the darkness of his closet - he could lie better when it was needed, instead of worrying what kind of darkness he was putting out. "Yeah, I'm okay - just thinking about Gabe is all," he said, hoping she'd take that answer. He didn't want to talk about him right now. They always seemed to end up talking about him.

She didn't say anything for a moment, seeming to assess, then she accepted the answer, and shifted again, curling back up where she had been. She almost grabbed his hand, too, to hug around her, but managed to curb the impulse. "I'm just scared of that. Of him, or what he'll do. He was afraid of me. Which...fear does bad things to people. And it's not even just me. What if he does something stupid, starts telling people, they tell people, hunters show up, and decide...I don't know, that everyone but Sophie's got to go?" she asked rhetorically. "Next time I want to go out anywhere...just...tell me no."

"Sophie and Oz can take care of themselves," Dean told her, reassuringly, though he was only a moment away right now from pulling back and going for the phone and dealing with this now. "And we'll be in England. You'll be safely away from everything where nobody will know you."

She nodded, but didn't actually feel much better. "I guess whether or not Oz and Sophie and you and Joshua and Billy and Maddie are all capable and everything...it's the whole you possibly being in danger thing that bothers me." she admitted. It was just like with her father, only...really random and she wouldn't know if anything happened. Not until she was getting hunted down, anyways. And if the person was any good, she wouldn't know until she'd been killed. Again. "And yeah. ...England." she said. Which wouldn't fix her trouble when she got back. But she was looking forward to that. Meeting people. Not necessarily the person who wanted to meet her the most, but...that was something she was trying not to think too much about.

Dean hugged her to him more firmly. "This isn't on you, Thia. If there's danger, then there's danger - and if there's hunters then they'd be coming anyway. And Gabe knows not to tell anyone and I'm going to go call him right now, okay? Because it's all a load of 'what ifs' and you're worrying about things that might not even be a problem, so, let's deal with that now, okay?" he said, letting her go and sitting up.

"Kay." she said, sort of wishing he'd stayed where he was--but that would be werid. He was going to be on the phone, and...yeah, whatever, it would just be strange. She'd just felt slightly better while being held. For her part she sat up, and leaned her back against the headboard, telling herself she was being silly, and it would be okay. Sort of. And Dean would talk to Gabe, and convince him that she wasn't really a threat and everything was going to be alright. And Joshua would watch the situation too, and...maybe she could call Isaac and let him in on the situation as well, so he'd know what the heck was going on. Plus--maybe Isaac would want to talk to Gabe about things. Maybe it would be nice for him to have someone to talk to or...something.

Dean snagged his phone from the table and paged up Gabe's number, before turning back to her. "I'll - I'll be back," he promsied, not really wanting to make this call in front of her. It'd be easier, he thought. Not having her watching, not having her wanting to know and worrying every second about how it was going.

She didn't really want to be waiting out the call by herself, wondering how it was going, but also recognized that trying to talk to someone while someone else was listening was really never a comfortable situation. So, she nodded. "'Kay." she told him, giving him a little smile. Or, it was an attempt at one, anyhow. She'd have to figure something out to occupy her attention. Maybe she'd....play excessive amounts of mojong or something. Sure. Whatever.